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So though the premise of a man falling in love with the voice of his phone’s operating system is a little ridiculous, Spike Jonze’s movie Her actually looks wonderful and maybe even believable. But duh! Who wouldn’t fall in love with Scarlett Johansson’s voice?
You already know what’s going to happen. Tim Cook will get on stage next week, Jony Ive will wax poetic about chamfered edges, Phil Schiller will be his jolly self and a new iPhone will be announced to the world. It will look a lot like the iPhone we already know but Apple will find some way to make it seem as if it will change everything.
Cigarettes are bad for you. No one — not even the guy smoking on the street corner right now — will argue that. But e-cigarettes just add a layer of ridiculousness on top of that. It looks like you’re playing with a dumb toy that lights up and annoys people because you get to smoke vapor indoors.
Have you noticed this trend in YouTube? You watch a video on YouTube. Maybe it’s a minute, maybe it’s two. Maybe you laughed, maybe you didn’t. But then there are five minutes of additional post-video video that tells you to either subscribe to their other channel, add them on Facebook, tweet out a shoutout, click on their next video, see what they’re up to, shill for a sponsor and maybe even do all of the above.
Even though YouTube is the greatest tool ever created to waste time, it’s also the biggest open house for gigabytes of completely useless moving crap. And even though YouTube can make any video viral, it’s also responsible for the onslaught of YouTube celebrities. YouTube giveth and taketh away.
Most company logos usually play it pretty safe: stale stencils or vanilla graphics mixed with a bunch of nothingness to keep uniqueness to a minimum. That’s never fun. But if you get too adventurous, the internet skewers you. That’s why we’re left with logos and brands that pretty much are all different degrees of the same. Design studio Maentis wasn’t happy with all that sameness, so it took the famous logos and brands we see everyday and created painfully honest (and hilarious) parodies.
This is perfectly ridiculous in every single way. The video thumbnails of IKEA’s Malm bed. The suggestive captions that use porny tag words like ‘blonde’, ‘twins’, ‘hammered’ and more. The ridiculous amount of views that each ‘video’ has. The live webcam. The skeevy black background. It’s a fantastic parody of a porn website if you replaced every single porn reference with just a link to IKEA’s Malm bed.
Freaked out about the “always on” Xbox One creeping on your life? You probably shouldn’t be. But if you’re one of those people who’s afraid of connecting your Xbox to the Internet, love playing old and used games and hate having a Kinect, this is your hilarious fear of Xbox One: it’s HAL 9000.
It feels nice to get points. It doesn’t really matter for what, but the more points the better. When you check into Foursquare, you get points, and it feels nice. And sometimes you even get a badge and that feels like the ultimate vindication, even if the badge is for 10 visits to the district court for traffic offences.
Because Twitter wants to force lightning twice with self-imposed limitations on communication, Vine has been awkwardly limited to 6 seconds of video. But what does that 6 seconds mean? Could Vine promote Vine in 6 seconds? Could you explain what Vine is in 6 seconds? Is 6 seconds longer or shorter than you think?