10 Changes That Must Have Steve Jobs Rolling In His Grave

I miss Steve Jobs. The tech world is so boring. So beige. Things haven't been the same without his show-and-tells, him slamming people left and right, or his email replies in the middle of the night.

Apple hasn't been the same either. And, wherever he is, Jobs probably doesn't like some of the things that have been happening or are about to happen in Cupertino. Here are the 10 things that would have probably made him shout his classic "this is shit!"

1. Siri

According to his authorised biography, Jobs really never tried Siri. He was handed the iPhone 4S at the last board meeting he attended, just before he resigned. According to Walter Isaacson, he appeared puzzled and less than impressed after playing with it briefly. Not surprising. Siri was and is a beta product. And a broken one at that. Apple treats Siri as the main reason to buy the iPhone 4S, even though it's really a gimmick that people rarely use. Had he known its problems, it's hard to imagine that he would have approved its release in a final product.

2. 16:9 4-inch iPhone screen

If this rumour is true, the ghost of Jobs wouldn't be happy. He really hated the idea of a 16:9 screen for both the iPhone and the iPad. He mentioned it publicly and in his biography. He believed Apple already had the perfect format. According to his own words, the company worked for years on finding just the right ratio, and they found that 3.5 inches was the optimal and most comfortable size. The one and only size. He even joked that 4-inch Android phones looked like skateboards.

3. Supply execs and managers in engineering meetings

According to Apple engineers, things are changing inside the company: there is a "growing presence of project managers and supply chain execs" within the company. They are present in every important meeting, which didn't happen when Jobs was at the helm. He would have never allowed these external executives to interfere with the genius of his engineers and designers. Jobs believed that the creation of Apple products had to be free of any compromise.

Image by Gemenacom/Shutterstock

4. Negotiating with Google-puppet Samsung

Jobs vowed to stop Android no matter what. For him there was no room to negotiate: Android phones were shit facsimiles of Apple products. He repeatedly said that Apple put a lot of effort in creating the iPhone, patented the hell out of it, and was going to defend it with all its arsenal. He believed that Eric Schmidt betrayed him and Apple, and he didn't want their money or a settlement of any kind. He just wanted them to stop using Apple's ideas in Android. He would have never sit down to negotiate with who he thought were thieves.

5. That shitty Apple TV user interface

Jobs hated the current Apple TV user interface. According to an Apple engineer, he rejected it five years ago. And when he rejected something, it's because he really hated it. But someone at Apple thought it would be good to put it back in the Apple TV now that he's gone. He's probably thinking "those cheating clowns! this is bullshit!" every time someone cranks up the set top box with his company's logo on it.

6. Making products with worse specs

That new iPad's thickness is 0.37 inches and weighs 1.44 pounds, compared to the 0.34 inches and 1.34 pounds of the iPad 2. All while the battery life has decreased to 9 hours vs 10 hours using it. These differences are not dramatic, but they are a step back in Apple's star product. They represent compromise, and compromise is for b-players, something that Jobs hated. He constantly pushed engineers and suppliers to get the product he wanted.

7. Supporting charities

This was a huge no-no for Steve Jobs, who repeatedly denied giving charities anything. The only time Apple teamed up with anyone during his tenure was with Red, the non-profit AIDS-fighting organisation supported by U2's Bono. Jobs wasn't convinced about it, but he went along with it because it was a marketing win for Apple to get U2 to support the iPod. But now Apple is actively giving to charities without asking for anything in return. $US50 million so far. Cook is even giving Red space on Apple's home page with no product marketing tie-in, something that Apple's have only done when a major catastrophe — like the Haitian earthquake or the Japanese tsunami — hit. That's not saying charity is bad! Just that Jobs never approved of it.

8. Giving stock dividends

This was another no-no for Steve Jobs. Obsessed by Apple's near-death experience when he returned to the company, Jobs hated the idea of giving a single cent to Apple's shareholders. Every analyst and investment company knew this. He wanted his war chest to keep increasing, to invest back in the company and to have at the ready to make strategic acquisitions. That's why Apple never gave dividends, even while they were able to do so for a long time now.

9. Company leaks, like the ones with Apple TV and Foxconn

Nobody would have dared to talk about a future product when Jobs was alive. Nobody. Much less the CEO of its biggest supplier. Although it was later denied, this is what happened with Foxconn's boss and the Apple TV set. I'm sure Steve would send undead ninjas to kill this guy if he could.

10. User interface details

This skeuomorphism thing is getting out of control. And there are a thousand little details that Apple is now fucking up in their user interfaces. Something that Jobs would have never allowed, with his obsessive attention to detail. When he was alive and in full strength, Jobs reportedly went through even the most minute details of every product.

Perhaps someone should get Steve Jobs' soulmate on the top job.

Yes, I'm talking about this guy. [Thanks Blakeley!]

Bonus: Kutcher

Seriously? This is shit!

Image by Fer Gregory/Shutterstock


Comments

    It's amazing.. the dilution is happening very quickly. Compromise is coming. It'll be interesting to see what comes out of the pipe in the next couple of years.

    dont mean to sound like I'm trolling or anything, but I get the feeling that if these changes happened while Steve Jobs was still alive, you would be saying these changes are needed, and accept any bad effects from it.

      True as true as true.

        Seems like Jobs wanted to go the way of Nokia... make a lot of money, then decide you'd make a perfect product and fail to evolve.

        I'm actually excited to see an evolution of technology from the company that has yet to innovate since their first mobile technology released.

      This article doesn't say that they're bad changes, just that Steve Jobs wouldn't like them. To quote: "That’s not saying charity is bad! Just that Jobs never approved of it."

        In that case I look forward to the follow up: Why you should care about any of these things.

      Most likely true.

      But it's also true that none of those changes would happen if Steve Jobs didn't like them. Therefore if they did happen, Jobs would have liked them, hence all who respect his opinion and ideals would like them.

    I think it's good that they aren't trying to play the What Would Steve Do game, and adopting some more conservative business tactics.

    Sure, having Steve Jobs' judgement was a huge asset to Apple, but if they started trying to guess his moves from the grave it would have ended in disaster I'm sure. I think adopting a more mainstream business strategy will give them time to find their footing without SJ.

      Doing what-would-Jobs-do is not adopting some conservative attitude. Its to keep pushing when "good enough" is not good enough. I believe we are seeing rapid development in Android, Windows 8 and their associated devices because Jobs' Apple set the bar high.

      I remember reading that the Apple engineers bought lasers so they could drill near invisible holes in the casing of the macbook so that the indicator light would only show through when it was on. When it was off it looked just like the rest of the casing. While it may be a bit of a wank it shows a philosophy that is clearly no longer a part of Apple. The products will suffer and the rest of the world will pass them by, and by then the bean counters will have made Apple into another Blackberry or Nokia.

    I agree give it three years apple will just be another company that makes ok product but there is better. Without steves vision and perfection there will be no more revolutionary products just more of the same marketed to be the next best thing.

    Next we'll see font hinting in Apple products *cringe*

    Apple can only go in one direction now and thats downwards, I can't see them maintaining the growth and keeping the good products. I never agreed with Job's harsh business tactics and beliefs but he was with no doubt the brains and special something behind this company and if History is a teacher Apple will go the same way they did the last time Jobs left Apple, and I can't see Microsoft bailing them out again this time round but who knows I'm sure someone will but they have a ridiculous amount of cash reserves so I would say it should take a long time and if not I will take my hat off to someone that can stuff up a company with the amount of cash reserves Apple has in a short period of time as you would have to be extraordinary to achive such a high standard.. hahah

    I wish Apple well as competition is always good but I've switch to PC and Android phone although I still do like my heavy and rather un-flexible iPad 3 I believe my next tablet will also be an Android based unit ..

      And the award for the worlds longest sentence goes to... Jonathan!

    As a few have already said here, without Steves visions, input & marketing ways we'll probably see Apple slowly slip back into what it was in the 90's. Which would be sad, because the Apple I have grown up with has been about innovating themselves and selling high quality products that are user friendly and are a statement.

    I hope this doesn't change and they spiral away into the abyss.

      Personally, I think Steve Jobs' two most most important talents were finding (and acquiring) the right people for the right job & knowing what ideas would sell.

      I don't think the man himself was such a great designer, but rather a freakishly good businessman who knew exactly what he wanted, wouldn't accept anything less & headhunted the people who could make it happen.

      Now that he's gone, I think apple will take less risks on new innovations & lose some of its monopoly on the designers that made them successful under Jobs' reign.

    Without Steve there is NO Religion.
    It was never about Products it was all about the Messiah.
    The Consumers/Acolytes really thought they were getting something of value, what was really happening was Steve stiffed his investors, screwed over the faithful, and Grew his Net (Personal and Company) worth out of all bounds.... Sure they were (still are) getting a value Product, but they were paying through the nose for it.

    With the Saviour (Apple saviour that is) dead, they will drift away, unless there is a resurrection to keep them believing for the next 2000 years.

    NB. Apple Has given out Dividends in the past, just not for a long time. (and never very much)

    11. This article

      hahahahhah. Nailed it.

    I thought this might be a parody. It is so over the top.

    Reading this, I can't help but think that Steve Jobs was a dictatorial, manic, control-freak boss who didn't tolerate debate or discussion. Am I right? I also think that Apple has peaked, its had its heyday, and will now gradually slip back into the same niche position its had all along in the desktop market. Why? Apple can't handle competition - witness the many law suits it brings against its competitors, and its failure so far to stop any of them.

    Clearly the mobile market is going to Android, and Apple will have to compromise just to keep up. This might be a good time to sell Apple shares, along with any Facebook ones you might also have, as both companies have started the slide downwards.

    Half the items on here would have been pretty far down the pipeline before Steve left the company, with the exception on the 'evil corporate suits', giving to charity and paying shareholders, of and kutcher Steve would have had his fingers in those pies.

    Essentially: TOO MUCH COMPROMISE.

    SJ was all about NO COMPROMISE... it was Apple's holy grail.. the reason Apple became so awesome.. because they never compromised. Now they have been compromising ever since he passed away.. it might turn out to be the right time to start compromising.. but I doubt it..

    I just hope that someone steps in and does something about it before it gets too far and we lose a precious resource in the IT sector..

    And for the record.. I hate Apple. I just see their value in the scheme of things.

      MobileMe was a shambolic and overpriced compromise - Steve definitely hated that one, and it happened on his watch.

    Admit it, this article was only created to say the movie with Ashton Kutcher is shit isn't it?

    I am a mere Storeman. I make less than $1000 p/w. I give to charity when I can. To have millions of dollars and NOT donate is disgusting.

    While I agree with this article. That last picture is a sham. Yes I hate Kutcher, but to put kutcher next to old-jobs is not a fair comparison. Putting Kutcher next to 70's-open-hair-hippie jobs and they look almost the same.

    6. Making products with worse specs? A tiny thickness and weight compromise to allow for a greater CPU, screen res, battery capacity and double the RAM?

    7. Apple has supported Product Red way before Steve Jobs died... since 2006

    5. Everyone knows by now that Jobs would do back flips. Tim Cook was talking about it just yesterday...Walter isaccsons book makes a big point of the fact Jobs initially hated the idea of allowing third party development on iOS.

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