Mark Zuckerberg Reveals Goat Named Bitcoin but Will Zuck Kill and Eat His Crypto Creature?

Mark Zuckerberg Reveals Goat Named Bitcoin but Will Zuck Kill and Eat His Crypto Creature?
Image: AP/Lucasfilm Ltd/AP

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg posted a photo of his two goats on Monday, and the crypto world got pretty excited after hearing the names of Zuck’s four-legged friends: Max and Bitcoin. But are Max and Bitcoin pets or something a bit darker?

Obviously, cryptocurrency enthusiasts are trying to decipher whether Zuck’s announcement means the Silicon Valley billionaire is betting big on bitcoin, a move that might surprise bitcoin backers since Facebook wants to launch its own currency soon. Facebook’s long-stalled Diem digital durrency, formerly known as Libra and derisively called Zuck Bucks, could be trialed by the end of the year.

But we at Gizmodo have a more pertinent question than anything involving Zuck’s thoughts on the future of Monopoly money. We just want to know whether Zuckerberg will kill and eat Bitcoin.

It’s not a ridiculous question if you remember a story from just a couple of years ago about what Zuck has done with his goats in the past.

Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey revealed to Rolling Stone magazine back in January 2019 that Zuckerberg once killed a goat and served it during a dinner Dorsey attended. The incident happened back in 2011, when Zuckerberg had made a personal pledge to only eat animals he had personally killed.

From Rolling Stone in 2019:

[Rolling Stone]: What was your most memorable encounter with Zuckerberg?

[Jack Dorsey]: Well, there was a year when he was only eating what he was killing. He made goat for me for dinner. He killed the goat.

In front of you?

No. He killed it before. I guess he kills it. He kills it with a laser gun and then the knife. Then they send it to the butcher.

A . . . laser gun?

I don’t know. A stun gun. They stun it, and then he knifed it. Then they send it to a butcher. Evidently in Palo Alto there’s a rule or regulation that you can have six livestock on any lot of land, so he had six goats at the time. I go, “We’re eating the goat you killed?” He said, “Yeah.” I said, “Have you eaten goat before?” He’s like, “Yeah, I love it.” I’m like, “What else are we having?” “Salad.” I said, “Where is the goat?” “It’s in the oven.” Then we waited for about 30 minutes. He’s like, “I think it’s done now.” We go in the dining room. He puts the goat down. It was cold. That was memorable. I don’t know if it went back in the oven. I just ate my salad.

Dorsey’s explanation caused plenty of confusion over what kind of “laser gun” Zuck might have on his premises. And we never really got a satisfactory answer about whether the wealthy have special goat-killing guns that the rest of humanity has yet to learn about. But that’s not important right now.

The important question is whether Bitcoin’s days are numbered. Bitcoin the goat, not bitcoin the cryptocurrency. Well, either one at this point, given bitcoin the cryptocurrency’s trajectory.

Do you have inside knowledge of Bitcoin the goat and whether he’s a pet or will soon wind up as food?