Twitter-Banned Clown Seeks New Posting Crown

Twitter-Banned Clown Seeks New Posting Crown
Photo: Drew Angerer / Staff, Getty Images
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Donald Trump has been retired from the U.S. presidency for a good two months now, but the urge to post has only gotten stronger by the day.

Banned from his former platform of choice, Twitter, for accidentally-oopsie-woopsie-inciting an insurrection at the U.S. Capitol, Trump has reportedly been growing restless — and according to recent reports, the former president has been in touch with several existing, if obscure, app vendors in recent weeks in the hopes of minting a social platform of his own someday soon.

On Wednesday, Axios reported that Trump and his digital adviser, Dan Scavino, are currently in talks with a relatively unknown platform called FreeSpace about a potential partnership. The details of that relationship seem fuzzy so far: As Axios notes, Trump is famously loathe to sink any of his own money into a business, preferring rather to lend his name and likeness and hope for the best. The platform itself also appears to be an odd fit for Trump’s brand, given that FreeSpace bills itself as focused on the “POWER OF POSITIVITY” and “incentivising, highlighting and rewarding good habits and healthy online interactions.”

While it’s of course always possible that Trump is seeking to rebrand as some sort of Gary Vaynerchuk-esque positivity guru, sources with knowledge of the talks noted to Axios that the partnership is far from finalised, and that Trump’s eventual choice could be “any of several companies, with more meetings this week.”

In any case, it does seem increasingly likely that we’re going to see a Trump-branded media venture lurch out of the sea at some point in the near future, and during a Sunday appearance on Fox News’ “#MediaBuzz,” his former senior advisor, Jason Miller, hinted unsubtly to that effect.

“I do think that we’re going to see President Trump returning to social media in probably about two or three months here, with his own platform,” Miller said.

While spending your post-presidency twilight years finding new ways to own the libs online is certainly a spirited choice, if Trump’s inner circle of toadies and sycophants had any respect for him at all, they might advise him to try peanut farming instead.