This week a fresh iPhone 11 leak suggested that the new series would have a rather dire set of names.
iPhone 11. iPhone 11 Pro. iphone 11 Pro Max
The flagship Pro Max sounds like a knockoff protein powder and we hate it.
But it did get us to thinking about some of the worst phone names that have cursed the market over the years. Strap in.
LG V50 ThinQ 5G
LG has a history of convoluted naming conventions, and ThinQ has only made that worse.
You don't need to advertise your smart ecosystem branding in a phone name. We assume it's going to be part of it at this point.
Also, nobody wants to say that many syllables.
LG may be trying to do the whole dual-screen-you-can-fold-back-thing in 2019, but Motorola on that bandwagon in 2010.
I hate how much I love this name. I want them to do a Motorola Ollie for the Aussie market.
Yezz Billy 4.7
This was actually a Windows Phone from 2014 that was named after, you guessed it, Bill Gates.
I totally get the homage, and that Yezz was its own brand, but the two words being mashed together is... interesting.
That's right, Asus collabed with Garmin to make a phone-GPS hybrid.
I guess back in 2010 they didn't realise that Google Maps was going to cut their grass HARD.
The whole OnePlus One, OnePlus Two thing is just a bit... perplexing? Nokia is suffering from the same problem at the moment with its 4.2, 3.2, etc devices. It's needlessly confusing.
LG Chocolate Touch
Samsung Galaxy S II, Sprint Epic 4G Touch
I think I went into a mini rage blackout just reading that. Just, why?
So this one was named the "Priv" after its privacy features, but that's super not how it reads.
Why not just call it the Blackberry Toff?
I really wanted to like the BlackBerry Priv. C'mon! Android on a Blackberry phone! Sadly, the company's latest, and possibly last, shot at appealing to users who've long since moved on falls incredibly short.
LG Thrill Optimus 3D P920
Like we said, LG loves a long-winded name.
There were a few Thrill phones the company release. But to be honest, "thrill" is the opposite vibe emanating from any LG phone.
It also just makes me think of this:
Yeah, we're going there.
Tim Apple can call the series the "Ten" all he wants, but plenty of people are going to ignore the roman numeral, especially when you add a regular letter next to it.
Subsequently, plenty of people pronounce the XS the 'Excess' and considering the price tag, that's fair.
Acer Liquid Zest Plus
This sounds like some kind of gross energy/vitamin drink hybrid and I hate it.