Today’s the official day that new Star Wars merchandise begins spewing forth from Lucasfilm and Disney. Too bad there are so many horrible The Force Awakens products floating around like Imperial garbage in a Death Star trash compactor.
Have you seen a Force-disturbing Star Wars product that should be expedited to the nearest Sarlacc? Please leave it in the comments below.
I hear Darth Vader often went on holidays on Dagobah, widely considered to be the Hawaii of planets.
Lemme guess: Dark Side, Light Side and… Yoda? How do you think they bent those straws, the Force?
I actually thought it was a Minion dressed up as Kylo Ren.
Andy Warhol is painting these in heaven.
“Here’s the story… of a man named Obi…. who was busy with Jedis of his own…”
This is the Stormtrooper who tried to kill Han Cholo.
The first couple to get married using these also plan to be frozen together in carbonite at the ceremony.
What do you have to lose when your company is already known as the evil Empire.
Vader and Yoda: Not superheroes. Batman: Not in Star Wars.
A great starter toy to teach your dog to chew on friendly droids and other hunks of metal.
He really shouldn’t be out there alone with so many Sand People on the move.
I don’t want to be the one to tell Chewbacca that he got stuck with the flavour “Spiced Latte,” do you?
Brush your hair with the one character that didn’t have any.
“Hey baby, can you help me get this Death Star operational or do I have to turn on the tractor beam?”
So you do admit this is really cheesy, Kraft.
You realise those are, like, C-3PO’s intestines you’re hanging in your bathroom, right?
In my day, we just slept in sliced-open tauntauns. [Update: Holy crap. This thing is $US4000.]