The great thing about leveraging nostalgia to sell toys is that your customer base is all grown up with jobs and disposable money for making exorbitant purchases. This isn’t the first time Hasbro has resurrected the Cobra HISS tank from its classic G.I. Joe ‘80s toy line, but it is the first time the company has scaled it up, added loads of detailing, and is charging $US300 ($416) for it.
It was just earlier this year that Hasbro revealed a fun G.I. Joe x Transformers mashup toy with a new version of the Cobra HISS that transformed into the Decepticon leader Megatron while a Cobra operative Baroness figure was behind the steering wheel. At $US90 ($125) it was easily the most expensive version of the iconic G.I. Joe vehicle released to date, but that now seems like a steal compared to the new G.I. Joe Classified Series Cobra HISS.
It’s another super-sized and super-detailed remaster of a classic Hasbro toy realised through the company’s HasLab crowdfunding platform. In the past it’s successfully brought creations like a $US350 ($486) two-foot tall Marvel Sentinel and a 30-inch long replica of Star Wars: The Mandalorian’s Razor Crest to fans, but this is officially the second G.I. Joe product released through the platform, following the Skystriker announced last fall.
But unlike the Skystriker that was scaled to the 3-3/4″ G.I. Joe O-ring figures from the ‘80s, the new Cobra HISS is scaled for Hasbro’s newer and larger six-inch figures, so it measures in at 19 inches long and almost 11 inches tall.
Tiny LED lights weren’t cheap enough to be extensively used in kids’ toys in the ‘80s, but the new Cobra HISS takes full advantage of the technology now with a detailed dashboard for the driver that includes glowing panels and even a light-up targeting screen.
To further taunt the G.I. Joe troops, the new Cobra HISS throws any attempt at a stealthy attack out the window with a completely unnecessary accessory on the front that projects the Cobra logo onto the ground in front of the tank. It’s ridiculous, and we want it.
The feature that anyone who grew up playing with the original toy and its faux tank treads will appreciate most is that the new Cobra HISS includes a fully working tank tread system with wheels and sprockets that roll along as the vehicle does.
It all sounds like a fantastic upgrade, but the new Cobra HISS won’t ever see the light of day if 8,000 fans don’t head on over to the Hasbro Pulse website and back the project. At the time of writing, just hours after the project went live, it’s been backed by over 900 people so far. If the Cobra HISS does reach its backer goal before 11:59 PM EST on Wednesday, July 6, Hasbro will include an “G.I. JOE Classified Series Cobra HISS Tactician figure,” but if it doesn’t, like the Star Wars Rancor before it, the tank simply won’t go into production.
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