Ryan Gosling, What Did They Do to You?

Ryan Gosling, What Did They Do to You?
Image: Warner Bros.

Warner Bros. can’t be excused for their actions. The Barbie movie is on its way and they have done unholy things to my boy, Ryan Gosling, of La La Land, Drive and Blade Runner 2049 fame.

Look at this face. This body. This outfit. All of it, the colour, the pose.

Overlay this with some of the music from Drive and have him say “I drive” and boom. Unholy. Gosling’s Ken is so hot and yet so sexless.

Warner Bros. announced a while ago it was bringing Mattel’s Barbie to life in what we thought at the time was a bizarre movie to make.

It’s still bizarre. And who would’ve guessed the Barbie movie would be shaping up to be one of the biggest movies to watch, but it is. Somehow. And despite Gosling-related abominations,  I’m excited for it.

Warner Bros revealed a first look at Margot Robbie in character as Barbie at CinemaCon.

The rest of the details, as you can imagine, are absolutely scant. We know Robbie will be joined by Ryan Gosling, Will Ferrell, Simu Liu, America Ferrera and Kate McKinnon.

We also learned back in July that Robbie’s live-action debut as Barbie had added a dynamic filmmaker behind the camera when Academy Award nominee Greta Gerwig signed on to direct the movie she’s also co-writing with Noah Baumbach.

Gosling, meanwhile, is playing bachelor, occasional paramour and owner of many sets of purchasable fabulous clothes — and occasional extra best male friend for when Barbie hangs with her gal pals — Ken. Deadline in October reported that Gosling was Gerwig and Robbie’s only consideration for the vital role in the Barbie extended universe, but the actor had previously passed on joining the film… until production itself stalled enough that Gosling has returned to negotiations after clearing his schedule.

What part Liu, still riding the high of Shang-Chi and Kim’s Convenience, will play is still unclear, it feels reasonable to guess that he’ll be a friend of Ken’s, but it’s a guess as to which one. It’s a similar case with Ferrera’s casting.

But truly, anything’s possible with this flick.

It’s a weird story, for a weird casting process, for a weird movie, but I guess when you’re already making a live-action Barbie movie and tap an icon like Gerwig to direct and co-write, you should probably expect weird. And my nostalgia is here for it.

Barbie is scheduled for theatrical release in Australia in July 2023. While you wait, why not check out every major sci-fi, fantasy, thriller, horror and adventure flick hitting cinemas in 2022.