If Y’all Love Bad Superhero Movies So Much, Watch These 5 Morb-Like Films

If Y’all Love Bad Superhero Movies So Much, Watch These 5 Morb-Like Films
Image: Sony
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We hear you loud and clear, Morb-heads. You love Morbius with all of your heart, that “Morbin’ time” is upon us and that it’s the first movie in history to sell 1 Morbillion tickets. But perhaps it’s time to move onto some other bad superhero movies.

Uh, ahem, sorry, I did say bad. That’s what we’re doing here, right? We love it because it’s bad and not because we’re bringing cult-like fanaticism to a mediocre movie on all fronts, right?

Perhaps there’s a universe where some of the movies below received the harsh criticism overwhelming praise that Morbius did. Come with me on a journey into Morb-like bad superhero movies. Keep in mind that this isn’t a quality ranking, it’s more of a “further reading” recommendations list.

Daredevil (2003)

Kicking off our Morb-like bad superhero movies list is Daredevil (2003). Starring Ben Affleck as Matt Murdoch, the blind lawyer turned superhero, the 2003 film Daredevil is a mess. It’s nothing like the 2015 Daredevil Netflix series, which although includes a snooze-worthy B plot from time to time, is a pretty well-rounded superhero show.

The Daredevil movie from 2003 is visually confusing, with an annoying use of sound and a plot that just doesn’t do anything (Fisk hires Bullseye to kill Daredevil, thrilling stuff, hey?). It also, somehow, features Jon Favreau as Matt Murdoch’s best friend Foggy, along with Colin Farrell as Bullseye, Michael Clarke Duncan as Fisk and Jennifer Garner as Elektra. It’s an absolutely star-studded cast, and yet it’s a total bust.

At the very least though, among its messy shots and boring story, you can get a fairly Morb-like enjoyment out of it.

Venom: Let There Be Carnage

A member of the Morbius Cinematic Universe (officially named “Sony’s Spider-Man Universe”), Venom: Let There Be Carnage (2021) also sucks.

While Venom-apologists tend to say that the comedic relationship between Venom and the man he’s possessing (Eddie Brock, played by Tom Hardy) is enjoyable enough to stick with the film, it’s filled with hard-to-follow CGI mess and a storyline as dull as tapwater (an alien symbiote possesses a serial killer and Eddie/Venom need to stop him).

Let There Be Carnage is certainly Morb-like, falling for exactly the same pitfalls that Morbius fell for (minus, you know, the slightly tongue-in-cheek tone). It’s a goofy story that’s all over the place.

  • Venom: Let There Be Carnage isn’t currently available to stream, however you can rent or buy it on Google Play, Apple TV or Amazon Prime Video.

Son of the Mask

I’m perplexed by Son of the MaskI’m half-convinced that this film does not exist, and that it actually exists inside of a comedy TV show where the writers needed to make up a hilariously bad premise for a film. Also, I’m still brooding over having to watch it in year six on a rainy school day.

Son of the Mask is creatively bankrupt, much like Morbius itself, focusing entirely on the association with a famous IP and not the IP itself (in this case, The Mask and in Morbius’ case, Spider-Man). It’s about a guy who gets the titular “Mask” and has a baby (the baby has mask powers). It’s yucky with heaps of gross bits. The worst part is that it lacks Jim Carey, the actor who made the original film so special.

It’s a family-oriented movie with some goofy graphics and scenes but there’s nothing here worth a serious, die-hard watch. A hate-watch? Maybe (Morby).

  • You can stream Son of the Mask on Netflix.

Underdog

Yo, I hate this movie. I remember watching it on an obviously pirated DVD in some shoddy disc case back when I was 10 or so. Thinking about it now, it was probably quality appropriate for the film itself.

Underdog is based on the original Underdog TV show from the 1960s, something that nobody I have ever met remembers. It focuses on a dog that becomes a superhero. Creative, right? No, not at all.

It’s just over 80 minutes long and is pretty bad, with story and action as deep as an inflatable swimming pool. I reckon it rates pretty high on the Morb-scale, considering it’s pulling from an IP that nobody actually knows about (no, Morbius the Living Vampire is not a staple of the Spider-Man comics in any way).

  • You can stream Underdog on Disney+.

Max Steel

The last of our bad superhero movies list includes the lowest scoring superhero flick on Rotten Tomatoes (0% on the Tomatometer), Max Steel. It blows. the film is based entirely on a range of action figures owned by Mattel, featuring the most boring action I’ve ever seen in a superhero film.

The actors also appear to be asleep while delivering their lines and there’s an annoying CGI robot that flies around saying just the most annoying things. It’s a film that exists entirely as nostalgia-fodder for toy-loving 90s kids.

At the same time, though, very worthy of a hate-watch. But “It’s Max Steelin’ time” hardly has the same ring. We’ll call it a Morb-like.

  • Max Steel isn’t available to stream, however, you can rent or buy it on Google Play, Apple TV or Amazon Prime Video.

While you’re here, why not check out every major sci-fi, fantasy and horror flick set to release in 2022.