You Need A Phone Case To Combat Humankind’s Hubris

You Need A Phone Case To Combat Humankind’s Hubris

We have all found ourselves thinking at one time or another that we don’t need a phone case. In that moment, we are fools, and Zeus punishes the arrogant.

The only thing more inevitable than death and taxes is that you will drop your phone. You hold the thing all the time, and you’re always just one step away from shattering this object made of glass on the cruel and unforgiving ground. One cannot evade destiny.

Sure, the phone usually looks and feels much nicer when it’s unencumbered by silicone, but that’s the kind of thinking that leads to STDs and unwanted pregnancy.

A replacement screen for an iPhone 12 Pro Max is $519. For a Samsung Galaxy S21 Ultra, you’re looking at $500.

Sure, you can insure your phone against a broken screen which costs hundreds of dollars plus excess charges when you actually use it, or you can buy a nice phone case for $50+.

Totally intentional phone case stress tests

As a technology journalist, I’m a professional who never actually never drops a phone by accident. Instead, I stage random drop tests that can occur at any time without warning.

For example, a few weeks back t I was doing a Fitness+ treadmill workout with my iPhone 12 Pro Max on a stand.

I perhaps got a little too into it (Sam is very motivating, ok), causing the tilted treadmill to bounce my phone into oblivion. Time slowed as it fell more than a metre off the top of the treadmill, bouncing on the hard floor into a glass barrier, narrowly stopping it from falling all the way to the ground floor.

From there, it slid under the treadmill with an accompanying loud crunching noise. Oh no.

But, thanks to the official Apple leather phone case, it’s completely fine. The leather on the case is torn up and the plastic on the inside is visibly cracked.

But while the EFM screen protector is scratched to hell, the phone is 100 per cent unscathed. There is no universe in which it would have survived such a fall unprotected.

Another example of my totally purposeful testing is from a weekend when I took a Samsung Galaxy S21 Ultra out of my pocket with wet hands.

I immediately dropped it more than a metre onto a tiled floor. It bounced impressively on the corner of the padded, military grade EFM Case Armour case, and was then completely fine, nestled beneath the kitchen island.

Could it have survived that without the case? We will never know, because I don’t plan on finding out. But probably not.

The same thing has happened with dropping phones in Tech 21 cases down flights of concrete stairs. Not something I would recommend with or without a case, but is certainly something I’d prefer to happen with a protective case with properly padded corners for shock absorption.

There’s some downsides, but…

Of course, there are downsides to cases:

All that plastic that you’ll only use for a year or two is pretty bad for the environment, and they’re weirdly expensive for what they are. Plus, some of them age in less than flattering ways.

But some of them can be wallets, others have MagSafe, and they allow you to further customise your phone. They also protect you from your own clumsiness, which is the true nemesis of most people.

Some also make claims about being anti-microbial that I lack the ability to prove one way or the other, but it sounds like a positive thing.

So please, for the love of all that is holy, use a phone case. Pride comes before a fall.