10 Things The ‘Storm Area 51’ Event Might Uncover (Besides Aliens)

10 Things The ‘Storm Area 51’ Event Might Uncover (Besides Aliens)
Image: Getty

On September 20, 2 million people plan on storming the Area 51 military base in Nevada, U.S.A. with the sole purpose of uncovering (and potentially emancipating) the aliens long rumoured to be held at the site.

But ‘them aliens’ aren’t the only things that might call Area 51 home.

Conspiracy theories have long plagued Area 51, thanks to its many, many layers of classification and government secrecy. They say that curiosity killed the cat, and it just might kill again, with the U.S. military releasing a stern warning against trespassing ahead of the event.

The flurry has also led to several nearby towns to issue advance emergency declarations for the date because their remoteness means that the towns aren’t built to handle a sudden influx of 2 million people.

While the military and townsfolk are preparing intensely for the arrival of the alien truthers, the debate is on as to whether people will actually turn up, or if it’s all just a bit of a joke.

If it does turn out to be real, and the extraterrestrial enthusiasts turn up, dodge the military’s bullets via their Naruto running AND make it into the sacred Area 51 base — just what might they uncover?

We have a few ideas…

10. JFK’s Brain

John F. Kennedy’s brain — or what was left of it — is missing. Three years after Kennedy’s brain was stored in the U.S. National Archives post-autopsy, it vanished without a trace. Since 1966, conspiracy theories have raged about where it ended up.

The most common theory is that it was whisked away by the U.S. government and/or Kennedy’s brother Robert, “perhaps to conceal evidence of the true extent of President Kennedy’s illnesses, or perhaps to conceal evidence of the number of medications that President Kennedy was taking”. If it was indeed taken by the U.S. government, Area 51 is certainly a prime location for hiding it.

9. The Honj? Masamune

Image Image: Wikimedia Commons

The Honj? Masamune is a sword forged by prolific Japanese swordsmith Goro Nyudo Masamune, and it’s been missing since the end of World War II. Following Japan’s defeat in the war, the Allies — including the U.S. government — demanded that all Japanese noble families relinquish their sword collections as a form of humiliation, which seems pretty cruel, if you ask me.

In any case, it’s believed that the Honj? Masamune, which had a prolific history dating back to the 16th century, and was considered highly sought after, vanished during these Allied raids. If the U.S. government did indeed take possession of it following World War II, where better to store it than the most inaccessible place in the country?

8. Human clones

Image: Getty

Human cloning technology is real, it’s here and it might just be happening. Dolly the sheep, the world’s first cloned animal, was born in 1997 — but cloning has ceased to make advancements since then. That’s because human cloning is banned in 70 countries across the globe, including the United States, U.K., Russia and China (although China does allow gene editing).

Surely, none of these countries would violate national and ethical bans on cloning. Surely. And surely governments around the world wouldn’t be trying to get — or already have — an advantage in the race for scientific cloning supremacy. There is definitely not human clones in Area 51.

7. The Amber Room

Image Image: Wikimedia Commons

The Amber Room, a literal room made from Amber, was designed by craftsmen Andreas Schlüter and Gottfried Wolfram, and gifted to Russian royalty in the 18th century. It was often called ‘the eighth wonder of the world’ because of its beauty and intricacy, and was the pride of St. Petersburg.

In World War II, the Nazis stole it. For a while, it was on display in Germany, along with other stolen treasure. Then it just kind of… disappeared? A couple of pieces turned up in 1997, but that’s it. Gone without a trace. Or is it? Maybe the U.S. government stole it back from the Nazis, and now it’s shimmering away in a dark corner of Area 51. It sure would be a neat bargaining chip to use against Russia.

6. Harold Holt

When Australian Prime Minister Harold Holt went swimming off the coast of Victoria in 1967, he never returned. Was he lost at sea? Was he picked up by Chinese submarines? Theories have flown for years about where Harold disappeared to, and we’re unlikely to get a definitive answer, but we can always speculate wildly.

The 1960s was a strange time for politics, and the Cold War was in full swing. Sure, kidnapping an Australian Prime Minister right in the middle of a war might have been a bold move, but who’s to say Harold isn’t livin’ it large in Area 51 with his alien pals? Maybe he just needed a vacay, and a swift exit to Area 51 via the sea was what the doctor ordered.

5. A race of subterranean lizard people

Image: Ctenophorus fionni (Peninsula Dragon) by Jose Ramos

Boy howdy, the U.S. really enjoys a good lizard person conspiracy theory. According to the theory, the world is being run not by malicious politicians, but by a race of underground reptilian people who merely disguise themselves as human. As rumours say, they’ve had their claws in world politics for many years, and also founded secret societies like the Illuminati.

If there’s anywhere in the world that would support and nourish these strange and cunning reptiles, it would be the cold and dank laboratories that I assumed populate Area 51. It would be the perfect breeding ground for this elusive species.

4. Rasputin, the Mad Monk


Russia’s greatest love machine ate poisoned cake and drank poisoned wine. He was shot in the chest — and still, he did not die. Though reports are hazy, it’s generally believed that Rasputin was finally killed by three gunshots to the chest, then later wrapped in cloth and dumped in the river to make sure he was really dead — but was he?

Sure, there’s photographic evidence of his death, but even the 20th Century was familiar with the “fake news” concept. I put it to you that Rasputin still lives — as a prisoner of Area 51. An immortal being is a rare find, and Rasputin’s knowledge could serve the U.S. government for centuries.

3. Walt Disney’s severed head


Walt Disney died in 1966, and in the decades since, a rather persistent and wild rumour has surfaced repeatedly — that Walt had his body, or just his head, cryogenically frozen, to be preserved for the future. This very specific rumour also states that he’s buried beneath the Pirates of the Caribbean ride in Disneyland.

The rumours had to have come from somewhere, right? But maybe they did get one thing wrong — the location. Perhaps, somewhere deep in the bowels of Area 51, scientists are — still to this day — literally picking Walt’s brains for the next big creative idea.

2. Bigfoot


Bigfoot is a legend amongst the cryptid community — an elusive beast that has dodged all attempts at capture.

Supposedly, one of these attempts was staged by the FBI itself. Bigfoot sightings are common throughout history, but the creature is yet to be found. Could Bigfoot call Area 51 home? There’s no evidence to say otherwise. In fact, there’s no evidence at all…

1. Psychic children

Image Image: Netflix

We’ve talked about the Montauk Project before. Supposedly, it was a U.S. government initiative set up to perfect the art of time travel and instil psychic powers in children. Yes, it’s also the inspiration for Netflix’s stellar Stranger Things TV show.

Preston Nichols, the first supposed escapee from the Montauk Project, has evangelised for years about this project, claiming he was abducted and experimented on by the U.S. government. The only problem is that nobody believes him, and isn’t that exactly what the U.S. government would want?

If the unkempt droves do turn up to Area 51 on September 20, and make it past the U.S. military, and get inside Area 51, will they find anything on this list waiting for them? Only time will tell.