‘How To Cook And Eat Placenta’ And Other Weird Stuff We’ve Googled

‘How To Cook And Eat Placenta’ And Other Weird Stuff We’ve Googled
Image: Getty

Whether it’s calculating basic maths or opening an incognito window to find out what pegging is – we’ve all been there when it comes to Googling embarrassing stuff.

In the spirit of solidarity I asked the office for contributions regarding the weirdest shit they’ve searched for. It’s okay, you’re not alone.

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Long ago, Google made the mistake of adopting the motto, “Don’t be evil,” in a jab at competitors who exploited their users. Alphabet, Google’s parent company, has since demoted the phrase in its corporate code of conduct presumably because of how hard it is to live up to it.

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Pedestrian Group Office

I once downloaded Tor so I could search ‘how to roll a joint’. I’m not sure if I used a secure browser out of paranoia or because I was worried that someone at Google would think I’m a loser – Definitely Not Tegan

It’s embarrassing how many times I have to Google how to find basic information in Analytics. It just slips right out of my brain every time – Tom, Gizmodo UK Editor

‘How to put my bones in a teddy bear’ – Leah

I got sprung by my wife searching ‘why do i laugh when other people cry?’ – Rhys

In the past week I’ve made two separate searches relating to ‘the best dinosaur puns/best dinosaur jokes’ – Josh

‘Why am I single?’ – Anon

‘Is it safe to moisturise your eyelids?’ and ‘how often should you wash your bra?’ – Sarah

‘I’ve been chatting to babes all day quote’ – Chantelle

I got so drunk for the 2018 US election the next morning I searched ‘who is the president?’ – Victoria

It’s not printable – Jack

‘How to soothe a bruised cervix’ – Steph

‘How to cook and eat placenta’Chris

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I'm a huge podcast tragic. From true crime to weird radio play style pods, I like shoving as much of it into my earholes as possible. But despite my efforts, I realised that I don;t listen to as many Australian podcasts as I'd like. Sure, I have a few favourites, but I could be doing more to support local creators. So I asked around the office to find out what the best Aussie podcasts are, and why I (and you) should be listening to them.

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I also decided that it would be a good idea to ask some tech journalist mates

I can’t think of anything silly I’ve googled because I have very good reasons for everything I do – Amanda Yeo, Freelance Journalist

Recently, finding out how much an inflatable tube man costsAlex Kidman, Freelance Journalist

I had to google what a belfie was, because I’m officially old now – Alex Choros, WhistleOut

I regularly Google ‘please don’t arrest me, I’m a journalist’ due to the highly illegal stuff I search for lol – Rae Johnston, Junkee

‘How to stop frequent flatulence.’ You know, for a friend – Ewan Roxburgh, Press Start Australia

‘Define Pay Pig’. It was the second week of a new job and a manager was behind me’ – Darren Pauli

I once did an extensive Google session about my new PC build randomly powering off before I realised I didn’t plug one of the power cables in properly – Angharad Yeo, Good Game Spawn Point

‘Justin Bieber height’ – Sam Murden, MSN Australia