“Songs tell of a creature that lives deep in the dark woods, spending its nights ‘killing for sport’ and ‘eating all the bodies.’
Even death itself holds no fear for the Actual Cannibal Shia LeBeouf…”
Oh, Tumblr. The source of some of the most fantastically weird and awesome shit that the internet has to offer. This time it has gifted us ‘Actual Cannibal Shia Labeouf’ thanks to user Sushinfood – the D&D character I didn’t know I needed until now. The people’s champion.
But what does an Actual Cannibal Shia Labeouf look like on paper?
Well, he’s a medium Humanoid who has a +7 for Stealth and +8 for performance, naturally. He also seems to be pretty ripped and charming, sporting 18 strength and 19 charisma.
While his intelligence is hovering around 10, he makes up for it with his axe and knife-wielding abilities, not to mention his Actual Cannibal attack.
I personally like the ‘Shia Surprise!’ ability, that allows him to rise ten minutes after hitting 0 hit points – unless his head is missing or body destroyed, of course.
Here are the rest of the stats:
Image: Sushinfood
As the Tumblr post reveals, Sushinfood’s DM sprung Actual Cannibal Shia LeBouf on their D&D group, which promptly horrified them all.
Frankly, I am extremely into it would be keen to have that legend run a game with my mates.
Shout out to our Sub Editor Amanda Yeo for spotting this one on her day off and absolutely making my day.