Guys, I've got some good news. North Korea looks like it may have abandoned its plans to develop nuclear-tipped intercontinental ballistic missiles and is instead challenging the US to a dance off. At least that's my reading of their latest propaganda video.
North Korean state news agency DPRK Today has released a new video showing men dressed in fatigues dancing to upbeat military music. And while it isn't an explicit call for a dance-off between the US and North Korea, hopefully the two countries can put aside their differences and settle this with some sick dance moves instead of nuclear weapons.
The video jumps from images of troops wielding intimidating weapons to footage of the men doing a somewhat less intimidating dance on a stage. Previous propaganda videos have been more about blowing up San Francisco and Guam.
I mean, sure, it has plenty of explosions, but so does Transformers. And we're not threatening to start a nuclear war with Michael Bay. At least that I know of.
If the US wants to compete with dancing like that, it's going to have to up its game. Propaganda videos released by the Trump regime in recent months have hardly contained any dancing at all, though Trump's videos have clearly been inspired by Kim Jong-un's over the top style.
Seriously, just check out this video produced by the Trump regime after the G20 summit in Hamburg, Germany — a conference where the American president was seen as not only isolated in the international community, but a laughingstock who let his unqualified daughter sit in for him at high level meetings.
MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! pic.twitter.com/NVDVRrWLs4
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 9, 2017
That's some impressive propagandising, but it isn't going to get the US anywhere without some great dancers. The North Koreans aren't messing around.
If the US and North Korea are going to settle this thing peacefully, they better get to it. Time appears to be running out, with both sides showing off missile tests in an escalating and increasingly dangerous fashion.
There aren't many good options for the US right now. But at least with a dance off there isn't any possibility of accidentally staring World War III. And make no mistake that WWIII is precisely what we're talking about when we talk about military options on the Korean peninsula. Even Steve Bannon knew that.
If nothing else, North Korea has at least given Hollywood an idea for the latest instalment in the Step Up franchise. And that's probably better than nuclear apocalypse. Right?