In 250 BC, Greek mathematician Archimedes sat down in a public bath and realised that the volume of water displaced equaled the volume of his body. This was the birth of the "eureka!" moment, and the realisation that I could use my iPhone 7 in the shower this weekend was exactly the same. "This shouldn't be happening," I thought. "But it is." As hot water trickled down the screen of my new phone for the first time, I felt a compulsion to pull it to safety. I did skimp on AppleCare, after all. But when my phone continued to play music and load all of the most recent death threats in my Twitter mentions -- just like it does when it is not in the shower -- I began to feel more comfortable. Not only that, I felt enlightened.
A real conversation I had
Like a superhero that had finally realised his strength, I suddenly felt superior to all of my peers who don't have the capability to obsessively respond to emails while also taking a refreshing shower. A quick search of Twitter confirmed what I had suspected: Using your iPhone in the shower is the latest status symbol.
Best new iPhone 7 features are definitely the camera and the awesome water resistance.
(I'm tweeting this from my shower)
— Ross, Erin (@ErinRoss6) October 3, 2016
Got the iPhone 7 and first thing I did was take a shower with it. Winning
— Gage Brooks (@Gage38755532) October 5, 2016
Wow I just took a shower with my iPhone 7
— Arman (@armantirmizi) October 6, 2016
Got my iPhone 7 in the mail yesterday and I'm currently tweeting in the shower to test how water resistant this is-- it fuckin works !!
— Haylarious (@haylebaby) October 6, 2016
Tweeting live from the shower. iPhone 7 is wavy I'm moist
— Manny Moshpits (@mannymoshpits) October 6, 2016
IM IN THE SHOWER YALL WITH MY PHONE IM SO GLAD I BOUGHT THE IPHONE 7 BC IM SENSING JUDES TO BAJIJI RN
— Layla (@CRUCIODOLAN) October 7, 2016
i have so many shower selfies bc of the iphone 7
— ㅤ (@heqburn) October 8, 2016
For those who say the iPhone 7 isn't any different, I'm tweeting this from my shower
— Tč (@tommycarroll_61) October 14, 2016
Best part of iPhone 7..... keeping it in the shower with me as I play music through it
— Evan Woodford (@EvanWoodford) October 15, 2016
I was texting in the shower today with the iPhone 7 and I just wanted to let ya guys know it really is water resistant??
— jordan.? (@Jordan_bitchin) October 7, 2016
The iPhone 7 is waterproof which means that I can now watch Netflix in the shower what a time to be alive
— Morgan Tate (@kimmorgantate) October 7, 2016
Some may say that this feature takes away some of our most precious time alone, the time free from the mental stranglehold that our phones have over us.
But they're wrong. Use your phone in the shower and feel the power.