Are China’s Robot Restaurants A Threat To US National Security?

Are China’s Robot Restaurants A Threat To US National Security?

It seems like every other week a new robot restaurant opens in China. Meanwhile, you know who hasn’t opened a robot restaurant in basically forever? America. That’s right. Forget students’ maths test scores and fighter jet numbers, China is eating the US’ lunch in the only area that really matters. And that lunch is being served by a robot waiter.

During the first Cold War, US policy makers used to refer to the missile gap. It was the fear that the Soviet Union had more nuclear weapons than the US. But now that the Soviets are no more — not to mention the fact that the United States could blow up the entire world many times over with its current stockpile of nukes — it has a much more pressing concern: The robot restaurant gap with China.

You might be saying to yourself, but Matt, robot restaurants are a dumb gimmick meant to distract the ignorant masses while hiding sinister technological advances that endanger the world. Why should the US be building robot restaurants? Well, they said the same thing about NASA. And then we went to the moon. Makes you think.

If America allows the Chinese win the robot restaurant race, it’s basically surrendering the automated future. I mean, take a look at the latest robot restaurant that just opened in Yiwu, Zhejiang province.

No, take a closer look…

Those are guns. Big robot guns that you didn’t even see the first time because robots are so stealth. In conclusion, America needs more robot restaurants and it needs them quick. This is more important than the Manhattan Project and the Space Race and Benghazi combined.

Photos: Little Blue (blue) and Little Peach (pink) at a robot restaurant in Yiwu China via Getty Images