Secret Mystery Tunnel Discovered In Toronto — Is Drake Involved? 

Secret Mystery Tunnel Discovered In Toronto — Is Drake Involved? 

A “large, sophisticated” tunnel was recently discovered near York University in Toronto. Unlike regular, non-spooky tunnels built for known reasons, the Toronto Mystery Tunnel was forged by hands unknown, for deeds unknown. Maybe it was Drake?

The CBC reports that authorities have ruled out “drug lab” and “marijuana grow operation” as potential uses for the Mystery Tunnel. Toronto police are expected to give a press conference tomorrow.

The 7m long tunnel had lights powered by a generator, and it was the perfect size for an adult human (like Drake) to walk through on missions of whimsy, mischief, or solitary rap practice.

Now, give or take a crack mayor, Toronto is generally a pretty chill place. No place for a Mysery Tunnel! But what man or beast illegally constructs a secret tunnel for non-nefarious reasons? A lot of questions persist:

In an interview with CBC News, Ray Boisvert, the former assistant director of intelligence at CSIS, said the discovery raises some important questions. “First and foremost is the question around the context of the tunnel — where it is positioned? How deep was it? How accessible was it? And what sort of things could be sent through that tunnel, being people or material.

Here are some potential use-cases:

  • Terrorism. Most scary, most obvious: This tunnel obviously took a lot of work to build, it’s very close to the future site of a large sporting event. Since the tunnel is near the Rexall Center, one of the host sites for this summer’s PanAm Games, this could be the beginning of an attempt to disrupt the Games. I hope it’s not terrorism! But the federal government’s threat level is still “medium,” suggesting no definitive foiled plot.
  • Drake’s Secret Lair
  • Drake’s “Thinking Tunnel”
  • Maple Syrup Repository, It Is Canada After All
  • Non-Denominational Party Tunnel
  • Sex Tunnel?
  • Sex Tunnel That Drake Dug?

They have already filled in the tunnel. Now they need to fill in the mystery. [CBC]