Who is this phenomenal southerner? What’s an Explainette? And how did this man come to the conclusion that the best “box-cutting implement” at his disposal was a loose, rusty razor blade? Concern yourselves not with these questions. The only thing that matters here is that our new friend exists, and someone decided to sit down and tell him what an unboxing is. God bless you, sir — and god bless your packing peanuts.