The Facebook #Hashtagocalypse Is Upon Us

We’d heard tale that this day was coming. Here to confirm our suspicions that, there is indeed nothing sacred anymore, the hashtag is officially infusing its personal brand of poison into our once-beloved Facebook.

Should you decide to click on the tiny demon, a list will pop up directing you to all the posts from your friends and “liked” pages that also use that particular hashtag. And while yet to be officially included, it’s only logical that advertisers and sponsored hashtags will soon follow — especially considering that Zuckerberg et al. will need something to take this recently removed cancer’s place.

The hashtag, employed by Charlie Sheen to celebrate rampant drug use and tweens to decry their tortured existence, has morphed from a fun little tool in Twitter’s early days to the soul-sucking linguistic parasite we find today. It’s permeated our language to the extent that whether or not it has any function is a moot point. It’s as a stylistic crutch for when crafting coherent English seems like a bit too much work. Because even before Facebook allowed this, people were using it as impotent additions to their status updates.

As both Facebook and festering contagions are wont to do, the new service will initially be limited to a small percentage of users before imposing itself on the community at large. And thus begin the End Times. [Facebook]