Bruce Wayne Is Actually Spider-Man, His Nemesis A Fellow Called ‘Jackstraw’

Bruce Wayne Is Actually Spider-Man, His Nemesis A Fellow Called ‘Jackstraw’

At least, according to this, uh, “Batman” toy. Now, mistranslations on cheap products are nothing new, but the way this one manages to gracefully fall off the rails (for a translation, anyway), only to end its life head-first in utter nonsense, is a sight to behold.

Ever since the masterpiece “The Backstroke of the West”, we’ve all come to appreciate the comedy power of interpreted language gone wrong. What makes this one, spotted by the folks over at Neatorama, particularly special is how it gets perhaps the most crucial detail completely wrong.

Here’s the relevant excerpt from the text above (courtesy of Neatorama):

…Bruce come to Gete, which was a corrupted city filled with various crime groups. Bruce found a basement under his villa, in which the equipments turned him into another person: Spiderman. With this mask, Spiderman stroke all criminal activates and criminals everywhere, such as Tougon, the chief of mafia, Doctor Jackstraw, the abnormal drug trafficker, even a mysterious opponents quite familiar with him…

I feel sorry for any kid that ends up getting this thing (whatever it may be) as a present. Hitting the school yard, confident in the knowledge of Bruce Wayne’s true identity as a web-slinging crime fighter is surely going to end up with a few unfortunate dakings.