Top Five All-Robot Movie Remakes

Our Real Steel competition challenged you to remake a movie with an all-robot cast. There were many fine entries, but only five of them could walk away with a prize pack. So what were the the five best robot remakes? This was a tough — and very amusing — competition to judge. Congratulations to all the winners — we'll be in touch to get your Real Steel Blu-Rays sent out to you.

MD Any movie starring Tom Hanks with Tom replaced by a robot. For example:

Cast Away: Not only does Tom have to survive stranded on an island, he also needs to avoid rusting. Sleepless In Seattle: With an alternative ending where robot Tom climbs up the outside of the building to collect the backpack, completely missing Meg Ryan. Philadelphia: Robot Tom succumbs to a computer virus and not the AIDS virus. Turner & Hooch: Where robot Tom and his robot dog battle crime on the mean streets of some sleepy backwater. Apollo 13: Robot Tom saves the mission by stepping outside the capsule to repair the damaged spaceship. Forrest Gump: Oh wait, he was pretty robotic in that movie anyway.

You get the idea.

Barry Joe’s Apartment remade with the cockroaches as robots. The dance scene where the cockroaches are dancing on the toilet would be great but instead of diving into the toilet. Someone walks in to take a leak, they all the robots jump in and as the guy whips it out and it’s hanging there, huge sparks from the robots fly up at him and well…..lights him on fire. Man on fire running off.

Klfair In the vein of butchering classics, I think there should be a remake of Great Expectations, with the tired old robot Miss Havisham who is only programmed to wear a wedding dress and be a miserable old sod raising Estella, the new young robot that Pip falls for. I think Miss Havisham as a robot would be sort of poignant and a good fit for the story.

Either that, or a Four Weddings and a Funeral. Hugh Grant is a robot!

Dudefella I firmly believe that the charming rom-com “Love Actually” would strongly benefit from the replacement of actors with robots. It could ask and address many existential questions, such as “are humans the only entity capable of love?”, “would sentient animatrons develop deities and holidays?”, and most importantly, “would robots release crass Christmas singles?”.

HR Aladdin. Genie is a robot which can tap into and change anything (except love and free will apparently). Jafar is an advisory AI which goes nuts and tries to take over. Aladdin is a worker robot which gets sick of his job. Jasmine is a robot being programmed to run all the systems. (They fall in “love”). The tiger is a firewall, the bird is a virus.

Of course it would completely ruin the movie, but ROBOTS!!!!

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