Canon Plays God By Fusing Calculator With Mouse

Why’d Sir Edmund Hillary climb Everest? “Because it’s there.” And so follows Canon, fearing neither God nor Science in its path to dominate forces of the cosmos under man’s will. The X Mark I Mouse. It’s also a calculator.

Say you’re “on the internet” and need to stop to add some numbers together. Better grab your calculator — oh wait, you already are. Say you’re adding some numbers together. It’s tax season. Better get on those taxes. But then you need to go to Amazon to order some new socks, or perhaps a book (digital? paperback? You decide). Better grab your mouse — oh wait, you already are.

Nothing can stand in your way. You have both the universal language of mathematics and the modern gauntlet of cursor-shifting in your grasp. You are human — elevated. Your veins course Bluetooth. So what’ll it be? Multiplication? Division? Double clicking? Trick question. You can have it all. You are become death, destroyer of worlds.

The X Mark I Mouse, previously hoarded by our friends in the UK, is now available on American shores. [Canon]


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