Gifts For Agoraphobes Who Really Prefer The Indoors
Some of the geeks you know may say they prefer the sun and air, but at least one-third of them are lying. Here are the types of gifts those people want. I should know; I’m one of them.
Dyson Air Multiplier: Normal fans are fine for normal people who are home a few hours a day, but a full-time house-dweller needs a full-time fan. This is how you can justify $379 on a fan that’s a gift. Because it’s not just a fan, it’s a statement: A statement that says your loved one may be too cheap to use air conditioning, but not too cheap to afford a Dyson. [Review; Dyson] [imgclear]
Sonos ZonePlayer S5:Every roomHands onSonos
Aquapeudics Shower: Total fantasy, but fantasy in the way that you can actually save up $US4300 and purchase one for your own home. Yeah, it’s a gift for yourself. Bathing is still important for people that don’t go outdoors, and the Aquapeudics combines a multi-headed shower with a hot tub with an acupuncture massage with a foot massage with an alien probing station. [Shower; Aquapeudics] [imgclear]
Honeywell Touchscreen Thermostat: Just because someone’s adverse to going outside doesn’t mean they like walking up and down stairs in order to adjust the temperature. Get one of these, including the touchscreen remote, so they can carry the controls with them at all times. It even helps make sure the temperature is correct where they are instead of where the thermostat is. Is this person this adverse to moving around that you can justify $US400 on this? Yes, yes they are. [Review] [imgclear]
Roomba 400 Professional Series: There are no janitors for your home to clean up after your mess. A Roomba is the next best thing. If you can find it on sale you can get it for all of $US100 (or less!), but it is the ugly red model. Who cares, you’re not the one looking at it. [iRobot] [imgclear]
Nikon Action 7×35 Binoculars:Amazon
Toto Washlet: There’s an obvious upside to being able to use a personal bathroom all day. But the downsides are that your friend goes through toilet paper incredibly fast, and gets stuck with whatever comfort level they have on their best toilet. The Toto Washlet solves both problems. Depending on the model, it’ll run you somewhere between $US500 and $US1000.
But everyone in Japan uses a Toto for a reason, because washing the bum before wiping cuts down on toilet paper usage by 80 per cent (ballpark figure). And constantly heated seats is something nobody can turn down, even in summer. [Toto] [imgclear]
Anything On This List: You know what agoraphobe means, right? They don’t like going outside, so don’t make them leave their house with any of the outdoors gifts on that list. [This list]