Are you trying to live more like Jesus? Is that purity ring just not cutting it for you? Let's introduce to you these sexy Inflatable Foot Cushions, guaranteed to make you a virgin for life!
Although these ridiculous looking kicks promise to help "keep you active while maintaining blood flow and muscle tone in your legs" while you're inactively watching TV, on long flights, or doing whatever else you do in a chair, I believe this un-gadget has an alternative purpose.
Another one to add to the list of fashion faux pas, the Inflatable Foot Cushions will repel away women faster than wearing socks with sandals. Admittedly, I want a pair of these suckers for myself. But only to see if they'll help me walk on water; after all, my momma tells me I have to stop being a little Satan spawn and start being more like Jesus. [Product Page via 7 Gadgets]