Summer has gone fast hasn't it? Hard to believe that many of you will be heading back to school sometime in the next few weeks. That means it's time to get on a schedule and prepare yourself for another semester of boring lectures, homework and tests. Sure, there is a lot of fun to be had—but the party is going to come to a screeching halt when you get out there into the real world. That's why you have to apply yourself now so you can get a good job when all is said and done. Either that, or you have to learn how to cut corners more effectively. Since this is the Thank Giz It's Friday roundup, we are going with the latter.
Step 1: Get on a Schedule
Even if you set your own class schedule, chances are you are going to have to get up before noon. So, you are going to need an alarm clock that gives you that jump start you need in the morning. I can guarantee that no clock will satisfy on more levels than the Orgazmo. Just set the alarm and an invigorating female orgasm will gently coax you from your slumber. Available for US$30. [Gobaz via Link]
Step #2: Dress For Security
If you go to a public school, you will probably find yourself caught in a crossfire at one point or another. Therefore, It is essential that you come to school with the appropriate bullet-proof protection.
Defender Hoodie: Features 2mm of Type IIA bulletproofing in the torso, which is enough armour to stop a 9mm full-metal-jacket round at a velocity of 1,090 feet-per-second. Too bad its only for police officers and security personnel in the UK. And the US$845 price tag sucks pretty hard too. [Bladerunner via Link]
Step #3: Dress for Success
Dressing up for school isn't all about personal style and deflecting bullets, it is also about getting an edge. No matter what subject you are in, there is an article of clothing that can help you cheat like a champ.
Math Equations Shirt: Available for US$15. [Sanchez Circuit]
Calculator Belt Buckle: Available for US$10. [BeWild]
Science Crib Sheet Shirt: Available for US$25. [Computer Gear]
US History Cheat Shirt: Available for US$17. [Snorg Tees]
Step #4: Get the Right Supplies
Sure, you need a decent laptop, calculator, notebooks and the like but may I also suggest:
Doggy Style Pencil Sharpener: Those pencils aren't going to sharpen themselves people. Might as well have a good time doing it. [Link]
LiveScribe Smartpen: This high-tech pen records the audio in the classroom then syncs it with the notes you take. All of that information can be indexed on a PC or you can play back specific portions of audio by tapping the corresponding section on your notepad. Available in 1 and 2GB sizes for US$149 and US$199 respectively. [Livescribe via Link]
Step #5 Manage Your Time More Effectively
You know all that sleep you are losing by getting up earlier? Catch up in class using some of these sneaky eyelid stickers. Your teacher would probably have to be legally blind to miss it in a small classroom, but in an auditorium you are golden. [Link]