It looks like writing "John Mayer here" really works to get Apple's attention when you report a problem. According to Steve Jobs' fab guitarist, they got back to him directly only four days after he sent the bug report ramblings:
...four days later, I received an e-mail from my manager saying that Apple was at my service. Word of my problem initially made it's way to Apple not by way of my public profile, but by a technician receiving the report as they would anyone else's and passing it along internally until word reached my friends at the company.
Well, John, sorry to bust the bubble, but if you start your bug reports saying you are John Mayer, of course your manager is going to get a mail from Apple. The support guy who took care of Mayer had this to say:
"We take crash reports seriously on our side, because for us it's just like being able to talk directly with the customer while the problem is happening. The information that we get from the automated system is perfect for helping us solve the problem, and obviously the customers comments can take it one step further."
We bet that Apple takes reports seriously, but have you ever got anyone from Apple—or any other company—sending you an email from a bug report? [John Mayer —thanks Robbie]
Guest Editor's Answer: Mr. T has sent hundreds of bug reports about Safari breaking down and never got ANYTHING back from those Apple suckas! Here's my latest report:
Hello suckas! Mr. T here. I was trying to do some editing today for this tech site and the crazy Safari crashed! I pity the fool who goes out tryin' a' take over da world with their browser, then runs home cryin' to his momma! So listen to me, suckas! You're going to fix this! Or I'm gonna kill that crazy Jobs! Sincerely, Mr. T
And then I added a picture of genitals drawn in ASCII code!