What's round, blue, and trying to get you off? Why The Rubbot, of course, a sex toy for men that's currently under development by a product design team in San Francisco who are also soliciting beta testers from among masturbators just like you for the project. Using something called the "Inch Worm Concept" to provide a fully automated wanking experience, the Rubbot's creators promise that it will prove to be "compact, hands-free, cool-looking and . . . let's just say, 'effective'" upon its release sometime next year. As far as we're concerned, a male sex toy we don't have to use one of our hands to fiddle with couldn't come a minute too soon, especially since our jobs require keeping at least one hand free for typing and mouse clicking and stuff—and that Thai hooker we keep hiring to take care of our other manual needs while we're working is starting to get awfully expensive.
The Rubbot: Hands Free Masturbation Is (Almost) Here
Trending Stories Right Now
Oh, so you thought Baby Yoda, jet-pack wearing Mandalorians, beskar, and camtonos made The Mandalorian a geeky, self-referential entry into the Star Wars canon? You haven’t seen anything yet.
Pop quiz, hotshot: say you’ve made a big, colourful remake of one of your most beloved animated properties, featuring a massive cast of people of colour, many of whom from groups that are typically only cast in Hollywood as, uh, terrorists. Say that movie makes a lot of money, and you decide to make a spinoff for your new streaming service. Which character do you base that spinoff on?