Back in 2002, TakaraTomy released a device called the Bowlingual, which claimed to translate a dog’s barking into human dialect you could read from a screen. Now, 7 years later, the company has updated Bowlingual to include vocalisation—you know, like a text-to-speech GPS but for an animal discussing the merits of eating one’s own feces.

It’s a Japan-only toy, so the voice of the American dog movement will continue to go unheard. But do what we do and just assume that your dog is perpetually trying to warn you that the old mill is burning down. Better safe than sorry. [TakaraTomy via technabob via pocket-lint]

Jump into your glittery spandex pants and crown you head with that leopard headband, because you are going to need them to follow the 100 million—yes, million—three-minute workouts of the Minutes Gym Digital Video Trainer.

That’s what Takara Tomy says: Their $US73 Minutes Gym thingie will give you 100,000,000 different workout exercises, three minutes each. It will also measure your fat and keep track of it over a three month period. I don’t know how well this will work—or if it will work at all—but I like the cute graphics:

[Japan Trends via Oh Gizmo!]

The Transformers Chrono Label will come in two versions: Cybertron Autoceptor and Destron Time Limit. The old-school dot graphic timepiece detaches from the wristband, and with a bit of tugging becomes a tiny little transforming robot.

It can be pre-ordered from NCSX for $US290.90 each. Wow, is there anyway we can transform that price into something less ridiculous? And maybe bring back this cute pop-up Transformer watch instead? At least it’s got colours. [Geek Alerts]