Apple’s WWDC Keynote will happen on Monday June 8th, at 10am. Phil Schiller will be presenting, as he has the last two Apple events. It’s tempting to start asking, “Where’s Steve?”, because it’s June. Don’t.

There is a lot of information to digest in the iPhone 3.0 update. If you want to get up to speed, check out our definitive guide—or watch the keynote in its entirety. [Apple]

Apparently, a trailer for Angels & Demons. Tom Hanks is here! He has Betamax regret! His first real gadget was a Sony Trinitron. Hilariously self-conscious, mocking the fact he’s shilling for Sony. All he ever sees is Sony, Sony, Sony. And uses Sony Sony Sony. Except the teleprompters! LG.
Here’s Sir Howard Stringer. Tom: “I’m whatever Sony wants me to be, Howard.” Tom is hilarious.

3D glasses, “unlike any other prototype before. They let you watch a movie while walking around. “Tom why don’t you try?” “Oh look, they’re so cool and hip…They’re going to get even better than they are now? I’ll be checking the Fedex.” “Will you take the hold off my paycheck for Angels and Demons now?”

Tom exits, being pulled into realm of Casio and Samsung. “Howard save me, you’re a knight!”

Howard: “I’m not recession proof.” He has seven principles for the industry: Fusion of industries, open technologies (Linux, consumers expect choice), social networking, squeezing more money out of consumers (he calls this a “value chain” and “good business,” go green, etc. Nothing unobvious or mindscrewingly revolutionary.

By 2011, 90 percent of Sony products will connect to Internet and each other.

Heeeeere’s the G3 Wi-Fi web browser camera. They’ve already uploaded photos of Tom and Howard using the camera to Picasa, and then sent it to a Bravia TV on stage. Available now for “an extraoridinarily reasonable price.”

Connected photo frame/alarm clock/screen thing with Chumby power—plays video, Big Ben alarm clock. Very cool. Quoting Letterman on weather from it: “It’s so cold in NY right now, Bernie Madoff is actually looking forward to burning in hell.””

Flex OLED protoype, eco-friendly. “How many people get a chance to squeeze Beyonce? I hope Jay-Z isn’t in the room.”

Sony sells more HD products than anyone else, they think they’ll benefit from DTV. We’ll see!

Pixar dude John Lasseter is here. “Sound check: Is my shirt loud enough in the back?” I want one. He’s here to pimp Blu-ray: “You can’t go back.” Showing Wall-E on Blu-ray. Man I love that movie.

He’s demoing Sleeping Beauty BD-Live content—menu represents real-life weather, kind of cool. His kids beat his arse at Cars Blu-ray game. Trailer for their upcoming movie Up. Looks awesome, and funny. More Tom Hanks talk: He’s working on Toy Story 3.

Talking PSP and PS3 and how they interact. Kaz Hirai coming up. Talking about PlayStation Network and how it’s expanding what you can do with PS3.

New free MMO called Free Realm for boys and girls, tweens and teens. Launching on PC first. Looks like medieval Second Life. MTV dumping 2000 hours of programming on PSN video. Hello, Real World Brooklyn! EA is now onboard PlayStation Home, bring more games and yay, contextual ads to “savvy consumers.” Overall though, no new PlayStation announcements. Where’s Netflix streaming? Seriously dude. Even my pants has that now.

America’s doctor, Dr. Oz is getting his own show thanks to Sony. Find out why your penis doesn’t work the way it used to, everyday. Oh, by the way, you’re a fatass. He just said Sir Howard is bulbous dude. He should be six foot six to match his weight. Drop your belly fat or DIE. Outside of a fried food convention, this has to be the most ironic place he could drop this speech. High fructose corn syrup is the devil, says Dr. Oz. I knew it!

Sony is all up in the new Yankees stadium. 550 Bravia LCDs. The whole park is on,e giant Sony commercial. Reggie Jackson is here. Says he can’t wait to see the new Sonyised Yankee Stadium. New candy bar: Reggie Bar. Tom Hanks loves it.

Talking up green products: Greenheart bio-plastic, Eco Bravias, etc.

Here we go; 3D announcement. We’re supposed to put on 3D glasses now. 3D Cars clip in Tokyo drag race. Gran Turismo in 3D. 3D footage from Virginia Tech at Orange Bowl.

Dreamworks Animation CEO Katezenberg up to talk about 3D. Two revolutionary events in the history of cinema: The arrival of sound, then the arrival of colour. He thinks 3D will be the third. (How conveniently poetic.) “It’s not your father’s 3D.” It’s 3D that uses polarised lenses and dual projectors (so you do still need glasses, even though Sony insists that they’re different ’cause they is state of the art and less dumb looking, from Ray Ban.) Showing 3D clip of CGI flick Monsters and Aliens, with a giant robot fighting a giant girl and some monsters—pretty cool.

Sir Howard’s back up with a Sony Ericsson phone, has Gracenote for identifying songs. And hey, our friend the Vaio P.

Hello, Usher. He’s in 3D too, but no glasses required. Usher: “Yeah I do…. know a lot about technology. *Pause* Sony technology.” He just had two sons, captured experience with… Sony. Howard asks if Usher misses the album. Usher says Sony Ericsson lets him make an album. Also mentions Sony sponsored his Broadway run on Chicago, which Tom Hanks’ wife was also in. Woooo, the incestuous commercialisation—as entertainingly, ironically self-aware as they’re trying to make it (and it is)—is mud-pie thick.

Howard wrapping up, talking about how they make dreams, rainbows and economic revitalisation happen.

And that’s it!

A bizarre clip meshing him into classic black-and-white flicks intro’d the speech, telling us how gadget companies are gonna save us from the Great Depression 2.0. It was made using a new service called Yoostar that’ll let you desecrate old movies by embedding yourself into them, along with other warped personalisations. Shapiro gets pretty cutting: Gadget companies are bright light, not just because they’re gonna breathe life into the economy , but they don’t need no bailouts like certain other industries, dammit. But even that light’s looking pretty dim this year.

Gary Shapiro loves some Obama, talking about how tech-loving he is, and how he needs to promote tech growth and innovation to keep America on top in tech (We’re on top? Really?). But he has no love for other politicians stepping in to make rules about technology. They’ve got some innovation checklist (pictured) for dumbo politicians to follow so they don’t hose the whole industry, and therefore, Shapiro says, America.

Hahahaha, he’s talking about how trade shows matter more than ever in crappy economies, and how it actually saves money for companies. I thought saving money is why companies have been pulling back on their trade show explosivganza.

Overall, it’s not a pretty picture for the industry when its cheerleader-in-chief lays out how grim stuff is, even if it’s mixed with pillowy clouds of fluff about how great the industry is.

Here’s what is currently unfurling in front of me, give or take a few guest presenters and some marketingspeak:

Ballmer comes out—my guess is he’s smiling. He talks about the wonderful world of consumer electronics. He mentions this company called Microsoft. He also mentions the tough economic times we’re all going to suffer through together. He will be optimistic, however.

He’s going to talk about Windows 7. First, he’ll announce the availability the Windows 7 Beta tomorrow for registered Microsoft beta peeps, January 9th for everybody else. He’ll run through a lot of stuff we’ve already seen on Win 7, like DeviceStage, Homegroup networking, “Play To…” and other coolness.

On the Windows Live front, he’ll tell us that Windows Live Essentials is no longer in beta, and that you can now post photos on Facebook directly from Windows Live Photo Gallery, and save photos from Facebook directly to your Win gallery too. He’ll also say that Windows Live Search and Essentials toolbar is gonna boot Google from Dell computers in February. Meanwhile, Verizon Wireless is going to implement Windows Live on VZW feature phones.

For Windows Mobile, the big news, as presumed, will be full Adobe Flash support in the browser. (Sounds good to me, if only the browser was as good as, well, others.)

Ballmer is going to call Robbie Bach to the stage to talk about connected entertainment. Bach will start with some good Xbox stats—28 million worldwide, with 17 million active Windows Live members, and over a billion dollars spent on the service since inception.

Bach will introduce a number of sweet products:
• Windows Mobile app for managing Netflix queue
• Xbox Live community game builder called Kodu (already buzzed about)
• Windows Media Extender functionality in Toshiba products (announced earlier today)
• The latest edition of Ford Sync, a separate release of which is on our homepage

That’s all we know so far, but stay tuned, because anything could happen.

Many people are bashing the Philnote because it was a bore and there were no new new NEW toys. In reality, the keynote wasn’t very different from many other that Steve Jobs did in the past. I remember some who were mostly the same: Endless software demonstrations plus a hardware update here or there. In fact, I think there were even worse keynotes, like that time when an endless parade of third-party software directors came on stage to show their support to Mac OS X. It took me several Guinness pints to get over that one.

So given what he had to present today–and I’ve to say that I love the new iPhoto and iMovie–El Schillerino did quite a good job. But even while he was good, apparently he’s not Steve Jobs and people weren’t as enthusiastic as when El Esteban is on stage. I don’t know what’s going to happen when Jobs finally retires from Apple, but maybe the key for success goes through free beer for everyone at the door. [Image based on the original beer goggles from Urban Spectacles via Dark Roasted Blend]

I’m a sucker for any Apple keynote, whether I’m in the stands with the press or F5′ing away at my browser like most of you. There’s a certain hypnotic timing to them, a clean presentation and a controlled, meticulous unveiling process that makes even the less exciting products seem monumental in scope.

During today’s last Apple Macworld keynote, not having been there, I actually forgot at times that Steve Jobs wasn’t presenting with Phil Schiller taking his place instead. Indeed, from the text/content alone, I wouldn’t have even noticed. The presentation style was intact—from the clean slides to the dramatic structure, it was an Apple keynote, even if it wasn’t Steve’s Apple keynote. But I want to know, do you feel the same way?