Although shooting a stream of plasma into your mouth sounds painful, the blowtorch actually works in small pulses, which lets the flame’s gasses ionise and cool down a little before they can burn you. So far, dentists have only used this technology to sterilise teeth during root canals, but have a few other ideas on where else to use it—perhaps, in the future, zapping away diseases on your genitals? [R and D via PopSci]

Here’s your opportunity to have Hollywood white, super-healthy teeth, thanks this revolutionary, super-safe, medical-quality laser toothbrush. It has an energy concentration so low that any tissue surface, even eye tissue, is safe! It works with a programmed tooth management system that turns on the laser for a recommended treatment period (55 seconds) with one-touch mode switch. In this case, the laser toothbrush does not need toothpaste but directly radiates laser on teeth. This revolutionary semiconductor medical laser helps decrease sensitivity, toothache pain, inflammation, and even helps eliminate bad breath. No more messy toothpaste accidents, now you can clean your teeth with light! [AA batteries included]

Don’t trouble yourself with working out exactly how the laser is powerful enough to burn plaque and germs but leave your gums, teeth and eyes intact, because we can tell you how. It’s a freaking laser.

Maybe we’re being to hard on the Smart Miracles Laser Toothbrush. Maybe this $US69.95 device operates just as advertised, eliminating bad breath and decreasing sensitivity while not necessarily doing a damn thing for actual tooth health—after all, a tongue cleaner can eradicate most morning mouth without cool beams of light. But still, I’m not trusting it to do anything right related to my precious oral hygiene. And I love lasers. [Smart Miracles via bookofjoe]

Unlike the Teledyne Waterpik of old, the manufacturer of the Dental Air Force throws more than just a stream of water at your grimy teeth and gums—it also uses air pressure and their own proprietary cleaning solution to “break through the plaque barrier.” Unfortunately, laying a beat down on Count Plaqula won’t come cheap. The unit is priced at $US240 and refills run about 30-35 cents per dose. [Dental Air Force via DVICE]

Dabori says that his patent-pending Giro Sponge holds water, massages gums and polishes teeth all at the same time. He hopes to have it to market soon, with versions for adults and kids. Besides the fact that I think it would feel totally creepy, like brushing your teeth with a wet rag, the real spoiler here is that you would have to floss all the time since it doesn’t go between your teeth at all–I hate flossing, and I’m not going to do it more than once a day. [Crave]

Say hello to Simroid, a new robot from Japan designed to help train dentists. Forgive me for being a little off-colour here, but this thing looks like it’s better suited to give BJs, but it’s looking a little too downsy to sell well in any of Japan’s numerous sex shops. In any case, it’s loaded up with sensitive teeth so it can say “that hurts” if it gets stabbed in the gums or something. It also has a gag reflex so it can react if an “instrument” is stuck down its throat. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to step away from the keyboard before I write jokes about this thing that’ll get me fired. Must… practice… restraint… [IT Media via Pink Tentacle]

Just like the home version, this travel version works with ultraviolet rays, and its makers claim that 99% of the germs are killed in seven minutes. Never mind that the 1% of bacteria that are left are probably superstrong, and might just put the hurt on you 10 times as much. But then, the way you feel about this product is probably a whole lot more important than the way it actually works. But hey, it’s your $27.99. [productdose]

As of right now, the device can only turn a CD player on and off (I mean, give a guy a DVD player at least). But scientists are confident that the controls have far more potential, with the goal of checking email on a mobile device. It reminds me of Back to the Future II. “You get to use your hands? That’s like a baby’s toy!”
[digitalworldtokyo via ubergizmo]