It's been a long time since I've heard anyone reference the old saying "You must chew every mouthful 15 times"...but those memories of childhood arguments with my parents have just come roaring back when I spotted the Kami Kami chew counter. No, seriously: this gizmo really is a counter that you strap to your kids and it counts how often they're chewing. It emits "encouraging" noises after 30 and 1,000 counts, and comes in two sizes from manufacturer Nitto Kagaku, suitable for younger or middle-school aged kids. Both cost about $US110, and are likely Japan-only items. Thank goodness. [JapanToday via Crunchgear]

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Costume National, purveyors of sleek, minimal-yet-glam clothes for people like me, has the perfect argument for not mixing clothes and technology, if you get my drift. A pair of the fuckiest fuck-me booties does not need to come with a stair counter screwed onto the ankle—a smaller (obviously) version of those machines that, I believe, exist in the gym. You do not do stairs in these shoes. You do your man in these shoes—maybe on the stairs, but believe me, no climbing is involved. They'll be out in September. [Fashion and Runway and WWD]

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Here's another spin on that countdown clock idea, but this one takes more of a Hollywood movie star approach. Decide your goal from among the few printed strips of paper included (or go ahead and make your own), slide that goal into the slot on the front of this clock, enter the day and year of your big special occasion, and you're off and counting.

What this has to do with a clapboard is anybody's guess, but maybe this is reserved for those Hollywood starlets who want to give themselves a measured amount of time to get that plum starring role before they leave town, going back to the soda shop whence they came. Beyond all that, it can also just tell you the time of day. [Design Town, via Oh Gizmo]

Here's an idea: Instead of just dropping your spare change into a gigantic bottle and putting off all that tedious counting for another day, why not just screw the Life Bank One coin counter on top of that bottle, and you'll know how much money is in there all along? It gives you a running total in its little odometer-like readout. Only trouble is, it counts Japanese yen at this point, but it's a cool enough gadget that we're hoping someone will convert it to US currency. Then you'll be able to go ahead and manually count out $8 in change and plunk it down for this helpful little doo-dad, saving you the trouble and keeping you informed of your vast riches at the same time. – Charlie White Life Bank One change counter [UberGizmo, via Sci Fi Tech]

Hi, Doggert De Niro here, Gizmodo's resident Method canine, and the latest of Gizmodo's resident pet testers*, with the latest pet-friendly product, the dog fat counter. You may remember my predecessor, Fluffy, better. That bitch (heyyyy, just joking, people, she's a wunnerful mammal and one of the best stunt pets in the business) tested the pet life vest a couple of months back. Terrible what happened to her. Anyways, she's no more, so it's my turn to step up to the plate. And that's just what I've been doing for the past three months, stepping up to a plate of food—three times a day, actually, such is my devotion to my craft. Originally I was cast in the role of Jake LaMutta in the big-screen remake of Raging Dog, but it fell through. Not before I had put on 14 pounds though, quite a lot when you're a mere Poodleweight.

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