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Burger King Has Invented A ‘Hands-Free Burger Holder’, Signalling The End Of Humanity’s Achievements
We had a pretty good run, folks. Humanity invented some pretty awesome stuff. We figured out how to harness electricity, we split the atom and we’re even closer than ever to understanding the origins of the universe. All of that is for nought now, though: Burger King has just called a halt on all scientific achievements from here on out with the invention of the hands-free Whopper holder. Stop the planet. I want to get off.
Exclusive: This DJ Is Potentially The Burger King And Jeep Hacker
It was just going to be another boring day on the internet when along came a hilarious hacker with a taste for McDonald’s, Gucci Mane and caps lock. Is a criminal mastermind behind the @BurgerKing (and likely @Jeep) takeover? Nope — just a guy who plays shows in Rhode Island who left an unfortunate internet paper trail.
If You Order 1050 Slices Of Bacon, Burger King Will Comply
You don’t have to be a doctor to know that eating hundreds of strips of bacon at a time can’t possibly be good for your health. A reporter for Japan’s Rocket News 24 obviously didn’t get that memo; he ordered a burger from Burger King with 1050 slices on top.
Burger King Employees Fired For Printing ‘F— You’ On Receipt
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And here I thought Burger King was the classy fast food establishment! Oh wait that’s Wendy’s. Anywho, two California Burger King employees were fired for printing “FUCK YOU” on a customer’s receipt. Watch local reporters take the matter very seriously.
Upscale Burger Kings Douse Japanese Patrons With "Musical Showers"
I haven’t been to Burger King in a long while, but if the States implemented the “musical shower” heads that the Japanese experience in their “upscale” Burger Kings, I could be enticed back into the glutinous fold one last time.
Windows 7 Burger Hacked And Unlocked
Japan’s Windows 7 Whopper Is Real, And It’s Horrifying
CheapAssGamer took the voyage to a Burger King in Akihabara to try the Windows 7 Burger. $US14 gets you the most desiccating pile of adipose flesh ever to be partially congealed by man. [CheapAssGamer Thanks Ashcraft!]
Japan Welcomes Windows 7 With Seven Layer Whopper Burger

























