Posts by Brendan I. Koerner
Phones
Motorola Insider Blame Game: Engineers Shoved Designers Aside
1:00AM Brendan I. Koerner | These days, most in-the-know folks would sooner eat glass than carry a Motorola phone. The company has shredded its reputation by failing to address basic interface design issues: freeze-prone software, head-scratching menus, keys that demand Herculean strength. It’s baffling that such a venerable company could build such frustrating phones, considering the zillions presumably spent on development. How did Motorola make such a bollocks of its wireless division? Now that the company has annointed new wireless division chief Sanjay Jha, we surveyed former staffers for the inside scoop, as well as their advice on how to right the ship. More »
Gadgets
Now the Gear Will Start: The Gadgetry of World War II
1:59AM Brendan I. Koerner | Granted, there isn’t much in the way of recognisable gadgetry in my new book, Now the Hell Will Start: One Soldier’s Flight from the Greatest Manhunt of World War II. Most of the action takes place in the Indo-Burmese jungle, circa World War II—long before the advent of the integrated circuit. But that doesn’t mean American GIs were entirely without nifty gear, much of which helped spur the development of our beloved modern toys. Read on for a rundown of three vital gadgets that took shape during the epic Allies vs. Axis throwdown, when geeks saved the world and my yarn’s (anti-)hero went on the lam.
Gadgets
Hype Sheet: Dell’s Do-Goodism and the Axe Effect
4:40AM Brendan I. Koerner | The Pitch A Super Bowl debut we somehow overlooked, this Dell spot features a cast of thousands swarming around one lucky laptop owner. With an XPS M1530 tucked beneath his arm, our handsome protagonist goes roaming around the streets of a European metropolis, Mick Jagger’s “Charmed Life” pumping on the soundtrack. The city’s denizens hail his approach with cheers, butt slaps, and at least one passionate kiss, treatment usually reserved for sporting heroes rather than users of mid-range computing hardware. What has this shaggy-haired Everyman done to deserve such adulation? Well, that Dell of his is part of the special-edtion (RED) lineup, so US$50 of his purchase price went to The Global Fund. A noble endeavor, to be sure, but (and excuse the ensuing crassness) will this good-hearted approach really help Dell move product? Read on for an answer, as well as a special “Making of…” clip.
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Hype Sheet: Nokia Welcomes Spendthrifts to the “Next Episode”
4:35AM Brendan I. Koerner | The Pitch Nokia ramps up its N95 8GB campaign with this lyrical-yet-baffling spot, featuring an array of international archetypes absorbing media in ways that may soon be obsolete: sitting in darkened cinemas, listening to battered boomboxes, watching interference-addled TVs. The narrator’s ghostly voice spills forth from the various antiquated devices on display, warning the actors that their worlds are about to be turned upside down—no longer shall they be tethered to the clock radios, opera houses and coin-op games of yore. Thanks to the N95 8GB, the mobile-entertainment future is now—at least for consumers willing to part with US$779. Is Nokia about to give Apple a run for its money in the high-end mobile phone market, something the Finnish giant has been hankering to do for a while? Or has Nokia picked precisely the wrong N95 8GB virtues to tout? More »
Gadgets
Hype Sheet: Apple Goes, Quite Gently, for the Jugular
4:15AM Brendan I. Koerner | The Pitch Apple sticks with the “dance with the one that brung ya” philosophy for the start of ‘08, churning out yet another Mac-versus-PC chestnut. This time, though, the tone’s a notch more acidic than in spots past—John Hodgman’s PC comes off as more flummoxed than usual, readily admitting to Vista’s many faults. (Sound like someone else we know?) Since this ad was designed in part as an intro to Steve Jobs’ Macworld keynote, it also includes a brief laundry list of Apple’s other recent accomplishments—notably last year’s iPhone coup. Does this commercial from the tried-and-true school portend a banner year for Apple, or is the joke (as well as its pull on consumers) finally starting to wear thin? More »
Gadgets
Hype Sheet Special: Blu-ray vs. HD DVD for All the Marbles
4:40AM Brendan I. Koerner | Few things set geek hearts aflutter like a juicy hardware rivalry. Who among us hasn’t thoroughly enjoyed taking sides in such legendary throwdowns as Mac versus PC, PlayStation versus Xbox, or (for the truest of old-timers) Atari versus Intellivision? It’s thus in our nature to pay excessive attention to the raging Blu-ray versus HD DVD imbroglio, which is several shades more entertaining that any other ongoing battle. Enormous vats of digital ink have been spilled in the name of arguing which format is better. But quality doesn’t always guarantee victory—just ask the Betamax. Who, then, is winning the disc-of-tomorrow advertising war? We’ll start with HD DVD’s latest entrant, starring…ex-San Diego Chargers head coach Marty Schottenheimer? What, Rich Kotite wasn’t available? More »
Gadgets
Hype Sheet: Back to the Future With Magnavox
4:15AM Brendan I. Koerner | The Pitch With mere days left before the dawn of 2008, there’s precious little time left to celebrate a geek milestone: the silver anniversary of the incomparable Magnavox Odyssey gaming console. This particular ad, however, aired in early 1973, about nine months after the Odyssey’s debut. The oddly unenthusiastic narrator terms the product “the electronic game of the future” as a Brady-like couple sets up their rig—a surprisingly laborious process involving plastic overlays. Man and wife enjoy a few rounds of Magnavox Hockey, Tennis, and (ugh) Geography on their “closed-circuit electronic playground,” twiddling the knobs on their toaster-sized controllers. The spot ends with an exhortation to visit your Magnavox dealer (”he’s listed in the Yellow Pages,” natch). A hilarious fossil of a commercial, but also an early example of how technology companies deal with marketing crises—especially when they’re in the midst of pushing truly novel products. More »
Gadgets
Hype Sheet: Olympus Sees Your Undies
4:15AM Brendan I. Koerner | The Pitch An intrepid mountaineer summits a snowy peak, raising his arms in the universal symbol of triumph. The celebratory moment is ruined, however, when his flip phone rings—T-Mobile has apparently been installing cell towers in the Himalayas. The message our intrepid hero receives is an important one: His fly is open, an embarrassing oversight that’s quickly corrected. How did the caller know the mountaineer was in danger of hanging brain? Because he’s stationed down below with an Olympus SP-560 Ultra Zoom camera, which features an 18x optical zoom. Okay, so we get the basic gist—hooray for a maximum focal length of 486mm! But what might this spot tell us about the future of Olympus, the world’s fourth-biggest camera maker? More »
Gadgets
Hype Sheet: Pioneer’s Nightmarish Vision
4:15AM Brendan I. Koerner | The Pitch Someone over at TBWA\Chiat\Day has been reading their Sandman back issues, it seems. How else to explain the terrifying image contained within this Pioneer spot, of teeth embedded in eye sockets—seems to be a direct rip from the Corinthian, no? The stuff of nightmares, perhaps, but also a pretty memorable come-on for the new Kuro lineup of best-in-class plasma TVs, which ostensibly provide the deepest, richest blacks this side of reality. Is Pioneer poised to become a serious high-end HDTV player, after a long stretch in the wilderness? Or is the company’s massive effort on behalf of the Kuros too little, too late, what with brands like Samsung and LG already so firmly entrenched in the consumer psyche? More »
Gadgets
