It’s a telescoping pole with a flexible gripper for your phone at the end. Inside, a cable connects the button on the handle with with your phone. Click the button and it takes a picture! From three feet away! People call them selfie sticks, but I’ve never used mine for selfies. I do things that are a lot worse.
OK, I’ll admit it. I did not attempt to acquire a selfie stick on my own. This particular one was sent to me by Syfy Channel, as part of a Sharknado III swag bag. I guess their goal was to include at least one horrifying item in with the shark candies, just to remind you that Sharknado is a monster movie. As I am naturally drawn to the darkness at the heart of life, I was immediately intrigued.
After a night of experimentation, I realised that the world has completely misunderstood these devices. They are not selfie sticks. They are REACHIE STICKS. Here’s how I know.