The First Shot Of World War III Will Be Fired By Russia's Mighty Poop Tank

War is a messy business, and if a Russian inventor has his way, it could be downright disgusting. Taking a 'kill two birds with one stone' approach, Aleksandr Georgievich Semenov proposes that tank personnel turn their waste into projectiles, resulting in both physical and psychological damage to their enemies.

Soldiers can be trapped inside their armoured vehicles for prolonged periods during heated battles, and dealing with the unpleasant human waste that inevitably builds up is definitely an issue. So as the graphic patent illustration details — complete with a Russian soldier dropping his drawers — the waste is simply deposited into a shell and blasted out of the vehicle using its primary weapon. If said waste happens to hit the opposing forces, all the better.

It might seem ridiculous, but if you know what it feels like to have been bombed by a pigeon, you can imagine how demoralising it would feel to be hit by your enemy's crap. [FIPS via Neatorama via The Guardian]


Comments

    they always said war was shit...

    C'mon now you're just talking sh1t

    How can you say we not related to monkeys, when we are going to be flinging poop at each other.

    Back to medieval warfare - "I wave my private parts at your aunties, you second-hand electric donkey bosom biters!"

      Donkey Bottom biters. Not bosom.. On the other hand.. still funny :)

    This is interesting. War with shit. is like saying poo fight!!!!

    So then Russian army is made up of monkeys now!?

    lol, the tank driver have to keep pooping to make it work .

    I wonder if this will spark a "Crap Race" between the US and Russia :P

    actually a good idea! The usual process according to a friend who drove tanks in Israel is to pop a hatch on the bottom of the tank and go out the door, which is unsafe at any time but particularly in NBC situations and weakens the bottom of the tank just where IED might go off . This is very gross for your opposition, love it . God help you if it jams in the loader however :-)

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