Aussie Doctor Says Your Emo Haircut Will Give You A Lazy Eye

Hey you angsty little jerk, listen up! If you can stop rolling your eyes and cut the whole brooding thing for like 10 seconds, I have something very important to tell you: CUT YOUR HAIR. I don't say this as some out-of-touch baby boomer threatened by the slightest tinge of change, but rather someone concerned with preventing a lazy eye epidemic.

Doctors in Australia say that asymmetric hair can block the view of one of your eyes to the point that it stops focusing and effectively atrophies.

Optometrists Association of Tasmania education director Andrew Hogan warned that amblyopia, the medical term for lazy eye, can result from obstructed vision caused by hair.

"If a young emo chap has a fringe covering one eye all the time, that eye won't see a lot of detail," he said. "And if it happens from a young age, that eye can become amblyotic."

And to top it all off, The Mercury also says you spend so much time tilting your head sideways just to see anything that it's totally ruining your posture. You are not a bird. Your body is not meant to do that. Stop it. So unless you want to end up looking like the bastard child of Forrest Whittaker and Quasimodo, I suggest you listen to the nice Tasmanian doctor. [The Mercury via Brendan Koerner]

Image: Shutterstock/Creatista


Comments

    Are emos still a thing and I don't think that chick is an emo... where is her black hair?
    Unless of course it is a boy in which case it's fine.

    I'd say it's a girl. Probably one of those new batch of emos. Just make sure you don't get them wet or feed them after midnight !!

    I wouldn't pay too much attention to anything the Mercury says, it's the Fox News of Tasmania.

    I got a few students at school with cuts like that and they all have a bung eye. It is really really noticeable.

    I don't think it's really EMO if you can stand any other colour than BLACK
    I've been wrong before but that's just way to bright and trendsetting to be a real EMO...

    Don't mention emos and cutting... The may get the wrong idea...

    The title may be a little misleading . Andrew is not a doctor ( e.g not a medical practitioner nor a doctor of philosophy). An optometrist is however an eye care professional ( they assess and provide refractive correction such as glasses and contact lenses) . I just didn't want everyone one to think that aussie doctors are actually promoting this. Although it is true that the visual system can be "plastic" into the late teens and a "lazy eye' ( decreased vision in the eye due to a problem at the brain level) may still be treated in a 15 year old , the chances of success get much lower. We do not have any evidence to suggest that covering an eye some or even most of the time in an otherwise normal teenager could reduce their vision. There is evidence that visual deprivation in the very young can cause problems. Perhaps this is why we don't see any one year old emos around? Relax emos you should not go blind (...from this)

    In case you were wondering, that chick is not emo, and even if she was, to wouldn't be able to tell from a picture. What she actually is, is scene. You guys need to keep up, I havent heard anyone say emo in 1-2 years now.

      You just did. Restart your counter!

      Scene is what emo kids invented to prevent themselves from being called emo. Put them side by side and the only difference is the colors they wear.

    1. There may be a point here
    2. Don't call them that!
    Not everyone who has a side fringe or has hair over their eye IS AN EMO.
    My friend certainly is not emo even though I tease her for it!

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