“Located on the 25th floor, the open air Terrace Lounge represents the height of urban elegance [...] high above the canyons of Wall Street.” Reading the promotional captions of Manhattan’s newest luxury condominium — 20 Pine Street — makes me want to puke.
Watching the photos — a nauseating catalogue of design furniture seemingly designed to place Macbook Airs and iPads with cocaine traces — further increases the sensation. Sure it’s comfortably pretty, sure it’s luxurious, sure there’s fancy indirect lighting everywhere so you can pretend your single-serving neighbours don’t exist, but it has the personality of an Ikea catalogue and Bed, Bath & Beyond wedding list. Combined. Except their furniture looks made with tropical woods and comes already assembled.
The boutique apartments are located in the former Morgan Guaranty Trust building, which later became Chase Manhattan Bank’s headquarters. It’s one of the architectural behemoths of the financial district, a gigantic beehive with the personality of a Soviet shoe, sitting on a place with less life than the Mojave desert flats. It’s Albert Speer’s wet dream with Ibiza chill-out music playing on the speakers instead of Dr. Goebbels’ favourite Wagner pieces. It’s also the place where a bomb exploded in September 16, 1920, killing 33 and injuring 400.
advice dog
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 3:32 PMi dont understand the hate for this place. lol
Drew
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 4:15 PMI have a question to the author of this article.
Jealous much?
RB
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:04 PMlol I was thinking the exact same thing…
Did Giz hire a bunch of Occupy ‘Blah’ protesters recently? Would explain a lot…
Charles
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 8:26 PMI get it – it looks boring. It looks boring. I mean, definitely using pretty strong words here, but it is a very grey and monotone sorta joint.
Uncle Bob
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 3:33 PMWow, that’s a fair does of resentment right there Jesus.
vin
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 3:40 PMyeaaa, that place is fking rad!
to think, at some point, all this was conceptualised in every detail… just to be branded so negatively by Jesus!
Ozoneocean
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 4:22 PMRad to the sort of person whose taste is dictated to them by someone else, yeah.
mike
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 3:42 PMwhy would you need 2 pool tables? I play league twice a week and can’t really think of a reason to have 2. Love the bank vault style door tho.
on another note – i’d happily take the 99%’s resentment if i could live there…
Drew
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 4:16 PMBecause you have 7 friends that want to play 2v2 at the same time?
Drovers
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:22 PMSure that it isnt a BIG mirror there at the pool tables?
Everything looks too symmetrical
Virus__
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 at 1:35 AMWhere’s the reflection of the door then? :P
Tom
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 3:47 PMI’ll gladly take more of Jesus’ political ranting if it means I get to see more architecture and interior design.
Just This Guy ...
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:00 PMThen you’d be better off going to a design site.
http://www.spaced.com.au/
mark b
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 3:49 PMJust because 1% have it; doesn’t mean the other 99% should want it.. i’m with the author on this one, the look is cold & sterile coming from a “C#%t & Uncaring” attitude towards anyone other than themselves.
Simon Reidy
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 4:05 PM+1
Ed
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 11:26 PMDo you know anyone in these industries? Or have you been brainwashed by “the peoples mic” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I62OBlimn9U scary
TSH
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 3:59 PMI can see where the author is coming from, but IMHO the paint and the furnishings do a lot more for the feeling of sterile impersonality than the architecture itself.
Looking at those spaces I was imagining rugs, giant cushions, pot plants and a fish tank. Big ol’ couch, TV, bar fridge, bookshelves and game consoles at one end of the room; big hardwood table with completely mismatched chairs; “lyric of the week” wall; and I bet the kitchen would be pretty sweet as well.
There’s some truth to the idea that home is where the heart is. If your heart is all right-angles and bland, non-conflicting, matching colours, you might decorate it like this. If it were *my* home, it would look decidedly different.
eltial
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 4:03 PMBitter much? I rather like it. Dont worry, it wouldnt stay very sterile once a family moves in.
Simon Reidy
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 4:12 PMCold, sterile, completely without character, warmth or any interesting design features. Other than everything having sharp, hard edges, which not only looks bad, but will probably lead to accidents (look at the edges on the pool tables!)
Just This Guy ...
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:02 PMMy thoughts too.
Looks nice as a photo layout for a hotel maybe, but also looks decidedly uncomfortable to actually live in.
Nice place to visit, wouldn’t want to live there though.
As I’ve always said, money can’t buy taste.
Drew
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:23 PMYou may not want to live there, but others clearly do.
So if it doesn’t tickle your fancy, that’s fine. Don’t go around telling other people that you taste is somehow superior to their taste.
I love Dr Pepper and mushrooms (not together) but my partner hates both, that’s great. More Dr Pepper and mushrooms for me.
Just This Guy ...
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:51 PMWell, I didn’t ask for your opinion about Dr Pepper and Mushrooms, much less state that I thought my taste was any better than anyone else’s.
Just different, and that money cannot buy it.
Antonia
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 8:18 PMOf course money can buy taste. Money owns it. Money creates taste (fashion, style…) or, if it didn’t actually create it, it quickly subsumes it.
As for the space being sterile, I don’t believe that spaces can be in an absolute sense (unless you mean a hospital theatre). Some like clutter and adornment and some prefer a minimalist approach and others a raw, honest approach to design.
Mac
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 at 12:07 PMShutup about your doctor pepper and mushrooms mate. No one wants to hear your twerpy opinions.
Richard
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 11:06 PMMy thoughts also, but then again it’s not my home so who cares.
alex effing
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 4:14 PMYeah – enough with the 1% crap…if you live in Australia, odd’s are that you are in it, or a lot better off than the average person worldwide who makes $800 per year. Thats like a month of living off of the dole here.
RB
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:08 PMAustralia is not America, so therefore American’s don’t care about it… Except for Koala(bears… GRRRR!!!) and Kangaroos… Oh and didn’t Oprah come here too?…
Cheshire Cat
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 at 12:41 AMYeah. The 1% is living in suburbia here. And still whinges about it. http://blogs.crikey.com.au/pollytics/2011/12/08/australian-exceptionalism/
I’ve also heard its about $32,000 a year as a wage. So to push home how wealthy the top is it should be the 0.01% and the people here need to stop crying poor because their likestyle not their lifestyle isn’t perfect.
Ozoneocean
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 4:19 PMLooks pretty dead… good interior design for a modern Pyramid type tomb. Now all we need are some nice looking jars for the occupants organs…
attila
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:12 PMThere have been photos on Giz showing Diaz’s place – I don’t think he should be handing out such scathing interior design critiques….
Drew
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:24 PMLink?
attila
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:44 PMI can’t find them now I admit. But check out his views on this bunker house:
http://www.gizmodo.com.au/2011/06/this-house-is-probably-more-secure-than-most-nuclear-silos/
“retains a beautiful airy spirit” apparently – despite being much more of an Albert Speer wet dream than the NY place featured here.
Nick
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 5:33 PMJust by reading this article, jesus sounds like an uneducated, commy uni student.
Brett
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 9:23 PM+1
Ed
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 11:20 PM+1000, not only that but ripping off Fight Club with his “single serving neighbours” haha, what a dick. It’s basic human psychology to resent those who you wish you were, Jesus, or Hey-Zeus. Unlike the people who thought that they would raise the living standards of their eventual children, those people became engineers, lawyers, doctors, and yes, bankers. Get a grip Jesus and deal with the fact you live in a dump like the rest of us and just write tech stories, not semi intellectual hum drum about your perceived misfortune in a modern capitalist society.
Be thankful you have a computer to write on with an internet connection and wait, a tap that supplies on demand clean water.
Paul
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 6:19 PMI want to be the 1% how do I join?
Maniacal
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 7:04 PMI like it. Colour tones are as per my house which alot of builders seem to be offering now.
As for moving in with that decor? Chances are the ’1%’ will redecorate it with the money they have access to.
And if I was in the ’1%’ bracket, I wouldn’t give a flying toss what the rest thought.
carmykal
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 7:20 PMLove it… not sure about the outside but imho i think its neutral. And thats fine with me.
Ed
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 11:32 PMhttp://www.gotfuturama.com/Multimedia/EpisodeSounds/2ACV02/03.mp3
Ed
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 11:32 PMhttp://www.gotfuturama.com/Multimedia/EpisodeSounds/2ACV02/04.mp3
Ed
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 11:35 PMYep well they didn’t work, great. they were Zapp Brannigan raging on “Neutrals”.
Steve
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 11:01 PMI love how Patrick Bateman this place is.
Ed
Monday, December 19, 2011 at 11:10 PMIf the 99% went to school, worked hard and got a high paying job in say Law or Banking, then they too could afford this. But they think it’s much better to whinge and whine and expect these things to be given to them by communist regimes.
Also not one… but TWO pool tables. I’m pretty sure Bankers and lawyers don’t have 3 friends.
Spock
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 at 5:06 AMDon’t make me laugh, any one of you – especially the author – would live here in a flash and drop dollar bills off the balcony like confetti if you could.
tony
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 at 11:03 AMthis man speaks the truth
olearymo
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 at 10:07 AMYeah, it makes me wanna puke…
WITH DESIRE!
Ash
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 at 10:07 AMAll look like fake computer generated images.
bri_cheese
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 at 11:16 AMSoon… Jesus, giz’ us resident apple fanboy, doesn’t like the minimalist, clean lines and samey design? Is actually funny…
JC
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 at 11:48 AMOh lord. I love New York… any of you guys who haven’t been there then wait for the Occupy Wall St douche bags to leave and go stay in Manhattan for a week. Time of your life.. no matter your age. Really is something for everyone and the place literally does not stop. I was there when they killed Bin Laden and it went off like a frog in a sock!! And if I was staying in this place that the journo hates so much then life would have neen perfect.