Missouri Bans Teachers From Being Facebook Friends With Students

Here’s a primer on what’s illegal in Missouri (some cities): owning a PVC pipe, having oral sex, minors buying lighters, minors buying cap pistols and now student-teacher Facebook friendships. Seriously, that’s banned.

Missouri State Bill 54, which was just signed by Governor Jay Nixon and goes into effect August 28th, says:

Teachers cannot establish, maintain, or use a work-related website unless it is available to school administrators and the child’s legal custodian, physical custodian, or legal guardian. Teachers also cannot have a non work-related website that allows exclusive access with a current or former student.

The new law isn’t specific to Facebook of course, it applies to any social network that can fit under the legal umbrella. You can theoretically still set up Facebook fan pages but the direct access and online communication between students and teachers on Facebook (and any other network) will become illegal.

It’s supposed to protect anything illicit from ever happening because, uh duh, all those improper statutor-ish relationships begin on Facebook. It’s an incubator for rape! It’s hell on the internet! Come on. It’s pretty silly to think that blocking student and teacher “Facebook friendships” could ever stop this from happening when the weirdos and creepers who get into these nasty messes STILL SEE EACH OTHER IRL EVERYDAY. By banning Facebook friendships, it’s almost accusing all teachers of some sort of blanket guilt, like they’re all going to make that mistake one of these days. No like. [KSPR via Mashable via The Atlantic Wire]