It’s a scary world out there. Fires in London. War overseas. Cane toads in Queensland. At the end of the day, you need to keep yourself safe. But how do you do that without drawing too much attention to yourself?
Well, the best offence is a good defence. And with these five tools, you’ll be able to defend yourself in a street fight without looking like an extra from Iron Man.
These Pumas look like they were made for Batman’s feet. And they look formidable at that. They give you two options: You’ll either run like Bane is out to break your back; or you can deliver a mean roundhouse and puncture your enemy’s face.
The Bodyguard is an electro-gauntlet that has it all. It packs a laser pointer, video camera, taser, and armoured plate, all ready to keep you safe when danger rears its ugly head.
It’s easy. If someone comes for you, start recording the incident for the police, frighten your assailant with the laser, and lay the smack down with a taser-ified punch. You can’t go wrong.
Deflexion is a powerful, popular textile that’s flexible enough to wear like anything else, but strong enough to keep your body safe. It hardens on impact, and then instantly goes back to its flexible state. Pack enough of this stuff onto your vital, fleshy bits and you can take on the world.
Well, the world that doesn’t have guns, but still.
The Zap Cane is exactly what it sounds like. Getting hit over the head with a cane is one thing. Getting hit over the head with a cane that’s packing one million volts in bad-guy-stopping power is another.
AND it’s a flashlight! Neat.
Alright, sometimes you just want to go all out. And that’s ok! Be a medieval warrior! Strike fear in the hearts of your enemies! Just… don’t wear this thing around children.
Top Image: Ljupco Smokovski/Shutterstock
Rob
Sunday, August 14, 2011 at 5:35 PMthe 5th one is considered stealth?
Dr_Stef
Sunday, August 14, 2011 at 8:01 PMHow much will that textile armor set u back?
Lebowski
Sunday, August 14, 2011 at 11:23 PM5 tools to turn you into a muppet that gets stabbed
Mike
Monday, August 15, 2011 at 1:24 PMRoundhouse kicks do not use the heel, but the ball of the foot.
I think you meant a hook kick (probably a spinning hook kick if you’re thinking of the fancy ones you see in the movies) – but even then you don’t strike with the heel – you still use the ball of the foot.
The only kick you should use the heel for is a back kick, and that uses the bottom of the heel, not the back.
So – those shoes would not contribute anything if you were to kick someone whilst wearing them.