Super Soaker Hydro Cannon: It’ll Make You Very, Very Wet

The Super Soakers of yore were precision weapons. Small. Thin, accurate squirts. A continuous aquatic laser beam. No more. The Hydro Cannon acts just like it sounds – like a big arse cannon of water. It’s a crude, brutish instrument.

Pluses:
The $US25 Hydro Cannon looks pretty imposing. If you’re in the midst of summertime water warfare, you’ll look like a bruising warrior. As far as people holding toy guns go. It’s got a neat-looking, useless orange “blast shield” that doubles as a neat-looking, useless scope – but it adds to the Water Rambo look. Most importantly, it’ll sling enough water to completely soak a friend or foe. It’s like sloshing a small bucket on someone. If you can corner them with it.

Minuses:
The Hydro Cannon is a pretty unsophisticated water gun. It’s heavy, leaks all over you, takes an exhausting 20 pumps before each shot – and that shot is pretty underwhelming if you’re expecting to nail someone from afar. It doesn’t have a ton of reach (certainly short of its advertised 10m), and it’s not accurate at all.

Overall, the aqua-ordnance the Hydro Cannon produces is pretty lacklustre. I’m fine with brute force – give me a giant mace, and Gizmodo shall unite the clans. But from such a mammoth weapon, I’d expect more than a splish-splash. Especially after an arm-wrenching 20 pumps. [Super Soaker]