Facebook “Revolutionises How Parents Stalk College-Aged Kids”

Actually, I was neither posing as someone (the software here created that name randomly (or so it told me), nor spamming; my company consults on change. The topic was change (says me) and so was my comment.

C'mon; take yerself a little less seriously!

BrandiLagnarok

I have my mom and some other family members. They get on a special list called "Family" though I don't really have anything interesting on my FB. Pictures of LEGO pirate ships and whatnot.

@Homerjay- that's all.: You sir, are my hero.

themellowmarsh

@Redwraithvienna: well what happens if you add your parents on facebook, but are not moved out, and living in the basement, because the other rooms are taken, while going to school.

Its going to be though for parents to stalk there kids on facebook when they need help from said kid just to get on the internet.

ploopsy

@Matthew Rebmann: I was only annoying for 3 days. :)

Facebook? Twitter? Sorry, what are those? I mean, I'm busy with REAL life!

TysonZetes

@Homerjay- that's all.: while you're probably awfully annoying, it really isn't that hard to not spell like your a goddamn moron.

Matthew Rebmann

@G-Ram: Brandi can haz bannhammer?

Matthew Rebmann

@acarr260: And you should have your star revoked for even replying, you should have just ignored it, but now everyone has to see it because you promoted it.

G-Ram

@RobinSure: People often type lol without actually have laughed. I believe they were making that distinction

elzorrodorito

@FritzLaurel: I HATE KITTIES!!!!!!!!

@GitEmSteveDave_WonAForeignLottery!: Patio, fool!

@FritzLaurel: I second this. I love the Onion, and I love Gizmodo, but I go to the Onion for the Onion, and to Gizmodo for Gizmodo.

Kev50027

@Adam: Oh, yeah it's the ones who communicate through a computer to their "freinds." Those are the "cool" kids. My bad.

If I wanted to read The Onion, I'd go to theonion.com, not gizmodo.com. STOP IT!

i make all my adult relatives only able to see my limited account

slyman928

@Software_Goddess: Those don't sound like the cool kids.

@Bokusatsu_Tenshi: Why does your emoticon have balls for a chin?

Greg Lloyd

@Bokusatsu_Tenshi: Seriously. If the news is total horseshit anyway, it might as well be entertaining in a good way, not a scary way.

jcraig

@Jeff Yablon (apparently posting as BrandiLagnarok): Thanks for the spam! Try to use relevant hyperlinks (not just a link to your blog/site), as indicated in the how to comment article of this site. Nobody likes more spam.

@Intelext: Do you frequently only laugh on the internet?

RobinSure

@D.E.P.C.: I want your body.: Get Firefox.

@iancoleTX: I am! Thanks!

Giz: why crop the videos? Can't you scale them to fit in this col?

Ayeco

And that's why I made another facebook account

pwnerjam4.0

@Software_Goddess: you are awesome Mom!!

loveshoney

I think you mean recalcitrant students.

mikegriffin

@Homerjay- that's all.: You must be a riot at parties

@Kaiser-Machead: I have a facebook type account used purely to keep in contact with my family which happens to be spread across the country. I giggle at the type of people who at 30 years old are still carrying on with their high school friends by sending 'secret' messages via facebook.

"I'm horny"
"Tee hee"
"I hope my mom can't read that"

Okay, I'm grumpy.

@ospreyguy: If you are on facebook at 28 years old, and still have stuff to hide from your parents, then perhaps you didn't catch the bus to maturity.

This is somewhat relevant? Eh.

[current.com]

@nekola18: There was actually someone at the office who wouldn't stop asking if anyone else saw Apple's new "MacBook Wheel" that he heard about online..... He had no idea that The Onion is full of tricky humor jokes.

I can't get the onion player to play on my Mac in Safari 4.0.3. It happens with a livestream tv channels too.

@Homerjay- that's all.: You... Can I shake your hand?

@Homerjay- that's all.: I love you, and you may have just made the world a better place through your ideas.

Followed.

Let's be clear, folks: even if it's stalker-like, meant as stalking, or full-out stalking, this is the way the world communicates now. Why NOT get w/ your kids this way?

Change requires changed approaches . . .

Jeff Yablon
President & CEO
Virtual VIP Business Coaching and Virtual Assistant Services

BrandiLagnarok

@dallasmay: When your living room is stuffed to overfilling with teenage bodies; your fridge is being drained of anything containing sugar or caffeine; and the entire neighborhood refers to you as ‘mom’…
Yah, I think their friends think they are pretty cool.

Software_Goddess

@FriarNurgle: Well, it'll be really useful for you when you get out of undergrad.

dallasmay

@Software_Goddess: Hmm, sitting on the couch playing Xbox all day. Are you sure the other kids would consider them cool?

dallasmay

Although I have kids of my own my 12 year old niece is the only kid that I have some authority over that is on Facebook. When she added me I told her that I would correct the spelling in all of her status postings until she learns to spell like a real person.

She stopped typing like shit within about 3 days.

man there's just so many possibilities here.

like if you're worried that your child isn't making friends at school, just post:

"dear jeff, jesus you were a STALLION last night"

or if you are afraid they have *too* many friends of that kind:

"dear jeff, it burns when i pee now"

jedi4life

Onion news is what real news should be... put some chaos in this boring world. >:3

Bokusatsu_Tenshi

@jackburnt: I was simply responding to the adding parents on Facebook part, not actually the whole stalking-your-ass-down-and-adding... you part. Adding a parent/uncle/aunt on Facebook may not always require them hunting you down.

@osprey: That's a pity, but like medication, individual results may vary.

Kaiser-Machead

My kids are too cool for Facebook and Twitter. They have their friends come to them in person. Their social network is usually sitting on my couch playing Xbox and eating my food.

Software_Goddess

Unfortunately, for The Onion sketch to've had any sort of resonance with me, I'd've had to've had some semblance of a social life in the first place.

Instead (I don't know about the rest of you but) this is certainly more apt for me:

AnAphexTwin

@avconsumer2: if you would note the "@Geqxon" attached to my post, you would also notice that my comment was not directed at you, rather at Geqxon. I was simply stating how Geqxon failed to note the sarcasm that is provided oh-so-nicely by the fine folks at The Onion.

@MxPxRobbie: rly?! If so, apologies & sarcasm detector fail.

Facebook still exists?

@Curves: OK, Mom. But don't forget to post the pictures!

DustyButtâ„¢

@Curves: Awesome.

ospreyguy

@Kaiser-Machead: I am 28 years old, married, have 2 kids of my own and I still can't have a beer around my parents... I love 'em but some things are just not worth the fight.

ospreyguy

@Kaiser-Machead: Uh, doesn't matter how much you like your parents. That's them not respecting you. Two separate issues.

LMBO......i was fooled for like the first min. of this video.....its hilarious

nekola18

fml. my mom started searching me on google yesterday. looking at all my tweets etc..

tennisman120

Awesome video. "Rilly f*cking cold in DC..." HAHAHA

The sad reality of the internet today. Can't wait till 30 years from now for when the teenagers and young adults of today are busy stalking their children digitally in whatever social networking service is popular then.

ddhboy

@Geqxon: sarcasm fail.

I know you're on the porch!

@Redwraithvienna: Unless of course, you're one of those people who happen to like their parents.

Kaiser-Machead

@Redwraithvienna: What? They wouldn't trust you when they find out what you really do when you're out of sight?

DustyButtâ„¢

Haha, i laughed in real life at "keep your slut hands off my son."

Intelext

adding parents on facebook is the digital equivalent of not moving out.

PS: If i ever found out that my parents stalked me on facebook with a fake name ... wow ... trust gone from a lot to zero

@Curves: Then it's just a matter of hilarious follow-through if he calls anyway. +1

Kaiser-Machead

@Geqxon: she's undercover genius.

Why not something effective like: "Dear Jeff, I had money ready to send you this weekend, but since you were out drinking with all your friends and didnt call me, you apparently dont need it, so your dad and I are going to the sex toy shop to spend it. Dont call next weekend, we will be busy trying out the new toys".

I lolled at 2:10, I love how mom and son talk to each other.

Yeah, real healthy relationship between those two...

Geqxon

GAAAAH! You got to me; today, you are the subject of my blog:

And yes, I'm including another link, because this is an important subject that truly needs to be examined better:

http://answerguy.com/spam-digg-gawker-media-gizmodo

BrandiLagnarok