Nike’s T90 Ascente Football Ball Has More Engineering Than Most Cars

@kagekiri: Fewer promotions... you're fired. :D

darngooddesign

@Pope John Peeps II: The most manly of all sports is, of course, female mud wrestling, closely followed by wet T-shirt contests. All other sports must be regarded as very unmanly.

ninjaviking

@Con Seannery: If it weren't for the far-reaching and long-lasting legacies of European colonialism and imperialism, there would've been more native entrepreneurs who would have more control of these countries' natural resources and human capitol, and recirculate profits into their own countries, enriching the parents of these children, instead of enriching Nike shareholders.

But instead we have these huge, powerful megacorps that shop around for countries in which they can get away with the most egregious exploitation and human rights abuses. When the local governments raise issue, they just pack up and leave to where they won't be bothered by pesky labor regulations.

asherchang2

@Hello Mister Walrus: The great thing about football is that there are no differences in the rules whether it's world cup finals our two local amateur teams playing. Only the rich leagues could afford to bring in video technology, it would create a two tier system that for me goes against what we love about football.

@Con Seannery: Get off my lawn Con S!!

I'm an American that played soccer for about 35 straight years (and by that I mean YEAR ROUND, high level club, put me through college, semi pro, etc.) and I still have to deal with the numbnuts that say "those guys are wussies!" Thing is I can't even dispute them. With the way these players drop at the easiest touch abhors me. That's a discussion waaaaaaay beyond this one but I've actually come up with another solution. No offsides. Think about it. Any of you that actually KNOW the game. Seriously think about it. Opens it up. Gives the skill players more room. Etc.

This ball though? Awesome! The ball they've been using for last couple of years has already increased scoring. It just floats and moves in ways that they never did before. If this does more than that? Amen brutha!

ninjamurf

@VenomIreland: Look up Mies van der Rohe, it's his phrase. He most certainly was not a fundie.

@Xeno: Little tikes cozy coupe. Best-selling car in the US.

@badhatharry: I literally LOL'ed at the end....Therefore......(wait for it...).........WIN!

@TheSonOfKrypton: Is that really the first time you have heard of that?
My buddy and I thought of a way to change NASCAR and make it more exciting. You put monkeys in the driver's seat, and give them a dummy steering wheel with a big "pass" button in the middle. Then, the cars drive themselves around the oval in single file until a monkey presses the "pass" button. Then the car drops down to the left and passes the car in front of you. And the monkey has to throw his poo at the car he's passing. At the end, I don't know how you tell who's won, but that's not the point. The point is that FUCKING MONKEYS CAN DRIVE IN NASCAR.

badhatharry

This ball looks awesome but it still uses the 32 panel design, I prefer the 16 panel design of the Adidas Teamgeist, that design is much cooler

KyleSF92

@Con Seannery: "Go fast. Turn left." hahahaha dude, that's fucking hilarious. I'm gonna use that one all the NASCAR fanbois I know...

@TheSonOfKrypton: true that! rugby is by far the most brutal sport, and it ought to have a bigger following in america.

@stackedrecords: hehehhehe good one mate!

ashwinaj

@nutbastard: Well then if they aren't wusses, why the hell do they have all sorts of protective gear?? I dont see rugby players wearing any protective gear? So whose the real wuss now? And yes real football(read soccer) players fein injuries, that's just part of the game.Just like all the circus show before during and after an American football game. Sometimes it just looks fake to people because you've never been kicked in the shin while running at full speed.

ashwinaj

@Kaiser-Machead: Yea that's how an American soccer commentator would describe it...god they are so annoying!!!

ashwinaj

This will definitly be my next purchase! I just hope it lasts longer than the 2006 world cup ball.

Faulkner16

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: I agree with your statement fully, but I would take it a step further. The game would benefit from technology immensely. For instance if all the players had RFID tags in their jerseys, the ball itself would have to have a RFID tag on it as well, and there was an electronic representation of the hash marks on the soccer field which would lead to a more accurate interpretation of a player being offsides the game would be brought to a whole new level. No longer would the human element blow a call and many spectacular passes that lead to scoring chances would increase. The implementation of technology in this fashion would have a two fold benefit to the game of soccer. Fans and players would not feel cheated for bad calls made by the linesmen, and the sport would grow in popularity in the States due to more opportunities for goals to be made. Lack of goals is a major reason Americans site as to why they don't enjoy watching soccer .

habenula

@Justinpaulson:

Con Seannery

@TheSonOfKrypton: And Chelsea FC is the best club in the world. :)

@TheSonOfKrypton: No, no, no...the better sport sounds like this...

He takes the snap, backpedals, he's got his man downfield, he passes, complete, he's to the 20, the 10, TOUCHDOWN!

Con Seannery

@VenomIreland: No, I heard it from an evolutionary biologist prof teaching upper-div writing for engineers. Basically, he meant "perfection is in the details." Or basically that sloppy writing with crappy grammar and spelling leads to less promotions, less proper consideration of your work, and a general worse opinion of your abilities in a company, though I think it's more generally applied with the explanation tande04 gave. Never heard of the devil version until now.

kagekiri

Disregard this one...

Con Seannery

@Fuji-kun: A bunch of white guys chasing a black guy? Because THAT'S the PGA, man...

Con Seannery

@VenomIreland: Wait. You just approved him? And he already has a star? There used to be a time when a star meant something. I did not have a star at that time.

EDIT: Whoops, he's been here for at least a few comments, I must have read what you said wrong. Either way, the last sentiment of the above, struck-through section applies.

Con Seannery

@AntonioBrocchus: You take that back. You take that back right now.

Con Seannery

@alexvanduyn: I'm proud to purchase these products and support the children and their families. If it wasn't for the first world purchasing these products, the children would have to work the fields for much less pay, they, and their families, may have their lives saved from disease and starvation by these purchases! So I proudly purchase products made with third world sweatshop labor, and I proudly pay so these children can, just as our children in America, have food to eat and a place to sleep.

Con Seannery

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: Fifa has been thinking of using balls with chips in the next world cup. That way they know when the ball has crossed the goal line.

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: They have already developed this, and I believe they will be implementing it some smaller subdivision leagues to test it next year. It's been around for a while but it is just now being sanctioned by FIFA. It requires no instant replay, but automatically alerts when the entirety of the ball crosses the goal line. I see absolutely no reason why it shouldn't be 100% accurate and implemented in all of football.

Brett Benedict

That is an ephing soccer ball.

wkm001

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: Actually it would seem that most car companies out-source some of their engineering to GM.

BlowfishAvenger

@badhatharry: for Satan finds some mischief still for idle hands to do.

Kevin Mann

@Justinpaulson: lmao! Good point! Even though it's really more of an ellipse...lol

@Pope John Peeps II: Hey man. I concede. Can't even argue with you there. I'm a TKD fighter myself, but in the future, Im mos definitely gonna become more adept at mauy thai/MMA in general.....

@ragingdrunk: That and its right there in the headline: "Nike's T90 Ascente Football Ball Has More Engineering Than Most Cars"

@NurseDave: yes. bastards. they started to bark one time samuel eto (black player from Barcelona) saying he was a dog. he scored a goal up their asses and then left the field. people suck no matter what sport. . . maybe golf :D

@LastVigilante: I think that second ball only went with the word soccer. Read: football. soccer ball.

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: Yes why does soccer never catch on in America....but NASCAR is huge?? I mean how can soccer be more boring than guys driving 500 miles in a circle?? Really?? a CIRCLE???

@Crixxtachi: Yes, but should it be called a "Football Ball" or just a "Football." I've never said, "Hey dad, lets go play catch with the baseball ball!"

@Magic Beans? Sure, I'll Buy Some!!: ROTF LMFAO I'll second that motion!

JP The BAMF

@Hello Mister Walrus: That would completely kill the natural flow that is the spirit of soccer (football) There is nothing I hate more than instant replays and waiting 5-10 minutes to see what is going on. It will NEVER happen in soccer...just like they will never have a clock that counts down or a buzzer. It is not the essence of the game.

@Kaiser-Machead: I cringed when reading their continuation of a perfect quote. Philistines, the lot of them.

@badhatharry: Biggest god damn flopper whiner of his generation. Blech.

@Kaiser-Machead: :D Simpsons writers are geniuses.

@Magic Beans? Sure, I'll Buy Some!!: A visual aid would also work well, perhaps a photo of Kim Jong Il's crotchular area?

"than most cars" really? And they sell it for $140. Exaggerate much? Where do I find a car that costs $120 over the cost of the materials used to produce it?

bustedchain

I wish my balls had that much engineering. Then may be I could do "stuff" faster...or better..or they would just look cooler.

@Pope John Peeps II: oh of course, I was talking about team sports, talking about martial arts opens a whole other ball of wax.

@Mister Ozzie McWhoface: You uncultured swine obviously don't watch the Simpsons.

Kaiser-Machead

Sean might not be interested in football, but at least he called it the right name in the post's title. Good thing.

Kudos for correctly calling it a Football

Crixxtachi

@thePrototype: It's so funny how every person thinks their sport is the manliest and toughest. Well, there's one sport that tops them all.

My sport is Muy Thai. There's nothing more manly. I live in a country of hockey players and I hate hockey. That's always my comeback and it always ends every argument as to which is the toughest sport.

@thePrototype: There is a difference between someone jumping on your back at full speed and someone kicking you in the nuts or taking out your feet at full speed. I've played both soccer and rugby and was injured more playing soccer from people taking out my legs.

BrainDamage

@thePrototype: aussie rules uber alles!!!!

i ain't sayin that just because i am a st kilda fan, either.

http://www.afl.com.au/

@tande04: That's interesting. I just approved of the explanation here, and it automatically extended my approval to all other comments it referred to.

@Kaiser-Machead: Oh, yeah baseball is so much more fun.

@TheSonOfKrypton: Here Here!

@nutbastard: Hey now! When you only get two or three goals in a game, you need to make them count!

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: Hey, don't laugh too hard...Tata owns Jaguar Land Rover. :/

@TheSonOfKrypton: Yeah I definitely knew what you meant, but I figured I'd politely point out the typo before someone tried to hang you by your keyboard cable for it. Also, you can only edit for the first fifteen minutes after you post. After that, your words are immortal.

What new tech has come around to help the goalkeepers? Poor guys. At least give them those bionic feet to jump farther.

klew

Ah some coverage of football round here. Nice!

@Yinzers Are Celebrating the Stanley Cup: Hmm...So I guess I can't edit it afterall. But yea, I looked back on my comment and that's what I meant. Just think about it for a second: NutBastard CAN'T argue that rugby is LESS than football in terms of manliness....But thanks for point it out, regardless.

@nutbastard: This is why I hated Vlade Divak.

badhatharry

@Yinzers Are Celebrating the Stanley Cup: Hey, yea, you're right dude. Thanks. Now to put this newfound editing ability to good use!!

@Nick: No. The devil is in my pants.

badhatharry

@thePrototype:Yes, because the men in soccer aren't 'real men'. They're more like beings in which mullerian inhibiting factor didn't COMPLETELY kick in. Yup. I TOTALLY know what you mean. **rolls eyes**

Real hardcore sports chart:

Rugby = Aussie Rules Football > Lacrosse > Hockey > American Football

Notice Soccer, Baseball, Cricket and Basketball missing from the list

@Xeno: Tata? GM? (low blow)

Purple Monkey Dishwasher

@TheSonOfKrypton: Dahani Jones would disagree with your perception of rugby and football. I think one of his points that was valid was that American football is a much more explosive game where the goal is to get the same power into a much shorter hit.

tande04

@nutbastard: What version of football are you watching? Serious career ending injuries are the order of the day anymore. On the other hand any time a hand is laid on any player they start crying like the prima donnas they are. Not to mention the absolute ugliness in the way most of them act on and off the field anymore. Used to love football. When it turned into the same thugs that dominate the NBA I turned to other sports.

tande04

@thePrototype: Yeah, I was talking about American Football which is much different than rugby. And I like American Football as well (huge PSU fan) but I don't agree with the argument NutBastard made

Purple Monkey Dishwasher

Ahem. It's a Football. Not a Football BALL. Just saying.

mac_kix_windoze

@kagekiri: No, unless you've heard it from some fundie.

As made by kiddy labor in Thailand! Real cost? $14!

@kagekiri: Two different sayings two totally different meanings. One is more literal saying that the proof of god is in the small things the other just means the small stuff in a plan, agreement, etc is what can really screw it up.

tande04

@NurseDave: Hah! Approval for you!

@kagekiri:I thought he was in a cream pie?

NurseDave

@TheSonOfKrypton: Not to be a jerk or anything, but you said "rugby is less than football in terms of manliness" and I'm sure your point was "rugby is greater than football in terms of manliness" or "rugby > football." I know it was just a typo, I'm not hatin', just helping.

@TheSonOfKrypton: thank you for recognizing that! It's always funny to see American football players bragging about this and that, and then my husband chimes in about how he was a rugby player... instant respect is given to him.

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: Rugby players wear the exact same amount of padding as soccer players, unless of course you have had a few concussions, then you wear a little bit of padding on your head.

@Nick: and a Prada skirt

logicalnoise

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: They need to allow soccer (football?) referees to use replays to make hard calls. There have been so many materially blatant errors that are uncovered in videos after matches.

Hello Mister Walrus

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: I've heard rumors of this technology making its way to the NFL. I thing the same would also be useful in hockey...although only when it is helping the Steelers or the Penguins score goals/TDs.

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: And, it comes preloaded with John Tesh's entire music catalog to ensure people kick the thing as hard as humanly possible.

Magic Beans? Sure, I'll Buy Some!!

What kind of cars are you buying that have less engineering than this? Kias?

Xeno

this one guy i knew in high school told me that soccer required NO skill. pfft, if anything it is one of the mainstream sports that require the most! i mean look at all of the sports that make you use your hands versus sports that utilize your feet. learning to control something with your feet is a lot harder than with hands. Fact. anyway, i'm not a big fan of the ball's design but i'm sure that it's pretty sweet. i've played with some high-end balls and they actually make a huge difference. i could definitely feel an ease in energy transfer from ball and foot.

Voohoo

Speaking of balls. This new comment system sucks sweaty pirate balls.

NurseDave

@TheSonOfKrypton: yeah, because it takes real men to play it, unlike soccer.

@thePrototype: I couldn't agree more! Played rugby in highschool, now thats a sport.

@Pope John Peeps II: Well, kinda, yeah. Without the ice.

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: I fully agree, like maybe some sort of transponder in the ball and the goal. I'm as big a US Soccer fan as anyone, but that when we played Brazil, I'm sorry to say, Kaka absolutely scored but the ref didn't catch it. As an American, I'm happy it wasn't counted, but as a fan of soccer, I get upset when things like that happen.

rifdawg

@nutbastard: I'm pretty sure that's only the Mexicans who do that.

Purple Monkey Dishwasher

@Nick: The ones that wear the Swooshtika?

NurseDave

@nutbastard: But Nutbastard, in terms of manliness, the manliest of the manly is none other than rugby. You can't argue that rugby < football in terms of manliness.

@Ehrich Blackhound: So... you have teams of drunken irishmen running on a sheet of ice, with bats in their hand, trying to catch a football in a small net? What the hell kind of sport is this?

Most of Americans' problems with the sport are because they don't really understand it. There is a reason its so popular, and it's not because they don't have the NBA, NFL, NHL and MLB. You certainly have a right to your opinion, but the majority opinion of football is that it is the best sport in the world.

AntonioBrocchus

@TheSonOfKrypton: This is true. If you are a 10 year old girl looking for something to do on a sunday. / i kid // kind of

sick_and_ashamed

@Kaiser-Machead: ...and then punt? Or wait, would that be: Center passes to wing. STOP PLAY. Back to center. TIMEOUT (it's hot under all this padding) Back to wing. Take another breather. Center holds it. Time for a cuddle. Punt it ? (replayed a 1000 times from 100 different cameras in numerous speeds)

stackedrecords

@nutbastard: Soccer players wear very little padding so that's probably why they get hurt easier. Also many of soccer player's injuries are cramps which hurt intensely for a couple of seconds but then subside. You don't get cramps when you play football because you are only physically moving for like 10 seconds at a time. That's why you can be an athlete even though you are 600 lbs. And I wouldn't call baseball and golf contact sports. Baseball you bat, run if you are lucky and then sit down until you get to go again or you stand in the outfield and hope that a ball may come you way. Not very exciting to me.

Purple Monkey Dishwasher

@Kaiser-Machead:
then if someone actually scores, we get the annoying-as-all-hell "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLL...! GOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAALLL!!!!"

@TheSonOfKrypton: Completely agree with you, except that it should be called futbol, not soccer.

I would love to have this soccer ball. It'd make me a kid again.

@iEro-Sennin: lmao. I understand your confusion because its just like mine, except for (American) football.

@TheSonOfKrypton: i'd rather watch foosball to tell you the truth.

@thePrototype: Puhleeezzzz.....Rugby is nice, don't get me wrong. But it's not the most popular sport in the world - for a reason.

@thePrototype: My vote is for Hurling. Combine equal parts Baseball, Hockey, Lacrosse, Soccer and Football. Add angry Irishmen with no padding. Shake. Marvel at what ensues.

@thanq: They should come out with some sort of chip inside the ball that will track where it is on the field.. Oftentimes, the ball will cross the goal line but the ref will not be able to tell. I believe they are working on something similar in the NFL to prove whether or not the football broken the endzone's plane.

Purple Monkey Dishwasher

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: in America, we like contact sports.

when a soccer player trips and acts like a total nancy, holding his shin like it's about to fall off, we all laugh and call him a pussy. we all know he's only employing such juvenile melodrama in order to increase the likelihood of a foul being called. and we don't buy that sort of thing.

with american football, we watch huge guys smash into each other and fall down every 30 seconds for an hour. it's exceedingly rare that any of them get truly hurt. So we’re well aware that falling down doesn’t cause excruciating pain in and of itself, which means that soccer players are wusses, and we don’t really oblige wusses much in this country.

@Nick: I didn't know soccer fans were racist!

tenazrael

@Save me: I could do that, but then the ignorant amongst us would immediately believe (since 'football' referring to 'soccer' violates their concept of the sport) that I am cheering on a sport where you throw pigskin back and forth and attempt to transfer as much of your kinetic energy into internal energy as possible, like fucking idiots.

@Nick: Isn't the saying "God is in the details"?

kagekiri

@TheSonOfKrypton: It undoubtedly is the most popular sport in the world. Best, not so much as "best" is relative. Now you see I cannot stand this sport. It's so bland and stupid it makes me wonder why anyone could watch 20 men run after a ball for over 90 minutes hearing fanboys shout from every corner. To top it all off, many if not most matches end up with at least a few casualties. Why? Can't you just fucking sit on your seats and just enjoy the match? But that's just me.

iEro-Sennin

@Kaiser-Machead: ......shoots.....GGOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLL...!

@Purple Monkey Dishwasher: Sadly, you're likely right. It'll never catch on here. Yet another plus for those born in Brazil....I mean, think about it: They get born into a soccer loving country, with bootyful women everywhere, and sun so many days a year you'd get sick of it! Damn. That would be the life...

@Kaiser-Machead: the devil is in the details

Nick

@Nick: OI OI OI!

Skeetz

@TheSonOfKrypton: spoken by a true sissy, Rugby is the best sport in the world. A rugby jersey is like Kryptonite to a soccer player, the minute a soccer player spots a rugby player, he scrambles under the table he came from.

Now, I'd like a ball that has a bluetooth micro chip that can be tethered with a chip in my soccer cleat. This way, only I could get the longer kick, greater accuracy, and better speed. Now, THAT will be a technological improvement. Why would I want to pay $140 for a ball that makes it easy for EVERYONE to get longer and more accurate kicks, not just me?

thanq

@TheSonOfKrypton: Center passes to wing. Back to center. Back to wing, center holds it. Holds it! HOLDS IT!

Kaiser-Machead

@thePrototype: Details, details.

Kaiser-Machead

@TheSonOfKrypton: I was born and raised in the Netherlands and have been living in the U.S. for quite a while now so I grew up loving soccer. I never quite got that soccer didn't become more popular in the US. I don't know if it will ever catch on.

Purple Monkey Dishwasher

@TheSonOfKrypton: If that is your stance, then you shall refer to it as football.

That is all.

@Kaiser-Machead: Wasn't Wilson a volleyball?

I wonder what the goalies of those leagues are thinking. I guess this is still a better solution than making the goals bigger or removing off-sides rules to increase scoring.

kagekiri

@TheSonOfKrypton: Flopping is the best sport in the world?

Sushiwriter

now if they can focus their efforts on gettin' all those racist bastards out of the stands

Nick

I really wish soccer was more popular in the United States. Then I may care a bit more about it. This seems like one hardcore ball, though.

Tom Hanks would've thought twice before slapping this with his bloody hand.

Kaiser-Machead

Soccer = best sport in the world. End of discussion. Just thought I'd throw that in there... ;)

Best Soccer Team.... CHELSEA FC

Babatunde Salako

so long as wolves stick it in the net, i don't care.

mzo

@AntonioBrocchus:
It could also be because the sport is old, and people are reluctant to change, and North America is new and therefor has new sports that it finds more entertaining, and simply put, soccer/football didn't quite cut it :p

HyperDrunk

@AntonioBrocchus: Judging by the tremendous response the NFL game in London gets every year, I'm going to go ahead and say that it IS because they don't have anything better than a bunch of fakers rolling around on the ground claiming they're hurt.

@Xeno: ford? pretty much any american car

minibeardeath