How The F$&k Did We Get Here?

@MF350z: That unexplainable picture is waaaaay too easy to explain.

Kid was doing the walk of shame after prom. Stumbled across a UPS truck that had lost control/a broken parking break and rolled back across the sidewalk while doing morning deliveries. The back had opened up and he jacked whatever that is in his hand.

This kind of stuff happens every day in New York.

@Signore Pinko-Panko! realizes his little joke...: As long as they can get it back down without the hull being smashed against the rocks...

@EarlHope: Someone dropped the tide to go.

psychiccheese

Gloabl warming? Rising seas? Yeah....whatever....

squishyalt

@Con Seannery:
Shenannigans say ye?
That cannot be!
For this boat, clear as day
is simply looking to go out and play

It's position is impossibly balanced
While the boat was impossibly finanaced
For in these times, in this recession
One can only hope for a shooping session

Now how it got there, I can't tell
but when the wind blows, it won't bode well
being stuck between a rock and a hard place
the captain should do an about face

leave the boat high and dry
until tomorrow, when he'll cry
about all the years he spent with her
sailing the high seas, in a blur

Though my rhymes may be weak
and my rythym looks bleak
they'll be preserved forever more
awaiting a super special encore

psychiccheese

@Lite: is on a boat.: I am constantly amazed at so-called developers that implement "solutions" to non-existent problems without asking the USERS what THEY actually want. Wow! In fact, stupidity like this irks me so much that I almost got fired from my job as a Senior Applications Engineer for firing too many idiots.

squishyalt

ye ol' squid monster.

@Xterm11_is Rhyming:
While your lines were long,
And your rhythm was sure,
And it read like a song,
And your intent was pure;
Here you've crafted a poem,
A true work of art;
Make yourself feel at home,
For this schooling may smart;

This boat's on the rocks,
This rugged wooden box;
Designed to sail fast and true,
She's surely the envy of many a crew,
And of her men, she's the pride,
Even while trapped by the tide!

Fear not, fellow Gizmodians,
'Tis one of Poseidon's shenanigans!
For as sure as two and one make three,
The coming tide will set her free!
Godspeed, take heart, adventure forth!
But next time you see the rocks, head a little north!

Con Seannery

@Lite: is on a boat.: needs a sage function, i agree

ninjajazza

@Mactacular: I'm trying to stop laughing, but its been 15 minutes and I still have a massive grin on my face. Thank you for that, thank you.

prabh1602

@Jesse in Japan: How could you bring up the numbers?! How could you?

The docking fees must be a bitch.

wolfsingleton

Photoshop, its an easy answer... just probably not the right one.

obbie

next step after the canting keel, the rolling keel. Tired of land getting in your way on a nice tack? Tire no longer, simply install a rolling keel and ride that wind up and over whatever land is in your way. Clearly these guys did not spring for the off-road tires, and their puny, inferior tires got caught in the rock.

Stitchopoulis

The lamest glitch ever!

jakster4u

sailboat for sale

realsnickers

@Bill Nye's Secret Male Lover: Then he should've said:
I have three words for you: WHAT THE FUCK?
I had to hit shift+CAPS lock there, Billy Mays scared the shit out of me.

@Xterm11_is Rhyming: There was supposed to be a break after the question mark. The rest was just an off topic comment.

So the lighthouse..-doesn't- work? Imagine waking up the morning after and just taking a nice dive into the..rocks.

Obviously the work of Godzilla

prunetracy

saaaayyy... this isn't Captain Hazlewood's personal boat, is it?

BongoFury

Well? I gotta know!! The vids were so awesome!!! Do tell!!

World iS Mi iPhone!!

@Lite: is on a boat.: :: pees on your star ::

NurseDave

Guess when Bob said "You know where you can stick you and your stupid boat,..." he didn't think Steve would actually go through with it (and get bragging rights in the process).

@ShawnYawn: groan

NurseDave

This is what happens when you follow a distress signal that just keeps repeating, "4 8 15 16 23 42."

Jesse in Japan

Yeah, good way to get me to stop commenting.

@Lite: is on a boat.:
I am guessing that you're right, "Lite is on a boat",
I really must agree with your every single note.
Your evidence clear, and conjectures are quite true,
That is why I really must, quite agree with you.

Except there is a discrepancy that I must object,
for, this boat is not small, this I must correct.
I must say, that this boat, is not so large in scale,
though I think that it deserves more credit in this tale.

As it was tossed or dropped, upon the rocky shore,
It didn't fall to pieces though it weighs a ton or more.
It's keel was strong, it's hull was firm, it didn't budge at all,
But, most importantly, the big boat didn't fall.

Xterm11_is Rhyming

Damn.. the sea feels pretty rocky today...

ShawnYawn

I think Ben moved the island again.

brahmachari99

@Xterm11: Agreed!

@The Lab: Trust me, it's painful for us as well.

@92BuickLeSabre: Bah, feature THIS!

hmm that's funny and ironic considering i was eating a pop sickle and the stick had this joke on it

@Bill Nye's Secret Male Lover: That was way more than 3 words

Xterm11_is Rhyming

@AldisSimpson: SCREW THE PREVIEW BUTTON! We need a sarcasm button.

Xterm11_is Rhyming

@Lite: is on a boat.: It's not a bug. It's a feature.

But I feel your pain.

In Soviet Russia, boat is on you!

TonyRockyHorror

I'm not entirely sure, but I think it involves Ben Linus, a pocket of exotic matter, and twenty 55 gallon drums of sawmill gravy.

dingus

@Ricano: It's not intuitive at all.

The side-effect of this new commenting system is that I cannot reply to a troll or even a person who is overreacting without bringing undeserved attention to their post now.

I really wish we could respond and select NOT to promote their comment. But that's just me.

And this is the last time I let Hancock help a beached whale.

The tide?

Nick Brownfield

I am really not enjoying reading greyed out comments and waiting for the anointed starred commentators to grace us with their presence.

it was only a 3 hour tour!!! But we lost the coconut GPS :(

JackMatt

Sailbad the Sinner strikes again!

@AldisSimpson: I don't know if you're being fecitious or not...

@Xterm11: kids....this is what meth does to you! lol...

mstolfe

Just sit right back & you’ll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip
That started from this tropic port aboard this tiny ship.
The mate was a mighty sailing man, The skipper brave & sure.
Five passengers set sail that day for a three hour tour,
A three hour tour

The weather started getting rough, the tiny ship was tossed,
If not for the courage of the fearless crew
The Minnow would be lost, The Minnow would be lost. Now that we have that out of the way... I imagine they got hung up and the tide level dropped. The water marks on the buoy are just slightly below the boat itself. So, I'm guessing waves pushed it up on the rocks?

The view is great and the moorage fees aren't that bad.

Bad place to anchor at high tide eh?

@Xterm11: Frucci belts the aesthetic soap above the crossword. Frucci kicks Jesus Diaz opposite the foam. Frucci rushes a threatened arc. The collective condones the joy behind a described fortune. How does Frucci scratch Jesus Diaz? Frucci disadvantages the fossil before the courtesy. How does Frucci export Jesus Diaz? The seen heresy partitions Frucci above the located snag. Why can't Frucci mix Jesus Diaz? Can Frucci freeze without Jesus Diaz? How will Frucci listen beneath Jesus Diaz? The rave attaches to Jesus Diaz. Frucci resists Jesus Diaz. A sensible plaster fails Frucci under an initiative. Near Frucci surfaces Jesus Diaz. Jesus Diaz argues outside an orchestral dance. Frucci creams Jesus Diaz around the running battle. The indefensible oil cooperates near a crawling peanut. I made these with a random paragraph generator

Xterm11_is Rhyming

@chonner82: easily the funniest movie i have ever seen haha

mstolfe

@Xterm11: I'd hate to see the unedited version.... ;-p

@Xterm11: I have three words for you: WHAT THE FUCK? I had to hit shift+CAPS lock there, Billy Mays scared the shit out of me.

@AldisSimpson: What? Really?

That's what happens when you don't have enough scope and the anchor drags.

Thangka

"dude.. what happened last night..? i blacked-out, man........"

chonner82

Stop with the gratuitous expletives. That is totally inappropriate for this website and will drive many of us-- and our families-- away from Gizmodo. You owe us an apology.

AldisSimpson

The guys who make keels clearly have had waaaay too much time on their hands

I hate the new comment system...

Noah sent forth a dove from him, to see if the waters were abated from off the face of the ground

TheShredder

Actually, it has always been there. The rock and water formed around it. True story.

Digo

Ok, here goes "any stupid thing I want to say": Gizmodo prosecutes in sailing. Sailing indulges with Gizmodo. Will sailing jump before whatever lethal percentage? Gizmodo poses. Its left tangent balls sailing. The movie missions a feat. Gizmodo fellows a coordinate. An obstruction towers around a chap. Sailing turns the passionate bathroom against the muck. Sailing rewards Gizmodo. Gizmodo opposes sailing. Sailing alleges the correlate newsletter throughout the scattered silicon. When will Gizmodo produce sailing? Sailing finishes around Gizmodo. Sailing experiments within Gizmodo. A drowned world gasps in Gizmodo. Sailing despairs throughout an autumn trace. A calculating fog splits a panic. Your faced graduate inhabits the big dogma. Gizmodo glows within sailing. Will sailing plague the bench?

Xterm11_is Rhyming

I'm just impressed the keel managed to find a place that managed to keep it relatively upright, rather than cracked against the rocks. It'll be (relatively) cheaper to fix that way, at least.

the loch ness monster

Wilky_McBadass

@jerNELS: shoot. i was only the second person to figure it out. oh well. cool and funny picture though! Although I like the title the best.

I think that's Billy Joel's boat.

I knew I should have taken that left at Albuquerque.

tide comes in, park the boat. tide goes out, boat is stuck on a rock.... bummer.

Black magic is clearly to blame. As evidenced by the obelisk of Despair and Taxes to the starboard side.

@EarlHope: I prefer Gain...

Con Seannery

Khan: I've done far worse than kill you, Admiral. I've hurt you. And I wish to go on hurting you. I shall leave you as you left me, as you left her; marooned for all eternity in the center of a dead planet... buried alive! Buried alive...! Kirk: KHAAANNNN! [echo] Kirk: KHAAANNNN!

That takes a serious amount of skill right there. Way harder than parallel parking.

Xterm11_is Rhyming

So... We can fucking talk about any fucking thing we fucking fuck want to? This is fucking cool.

I would imagine that the rock was under water when the tide was in. The ship got high centered on the rock then the tide went out. The water line on the warning beacon behind it (and the fact that there is a warning beacon behind it) seem to support that theory.

tande04

its gotta be the tide

EarlHope

"whosoever can remove this boat from the stone shall be king of camelot!!"

Mactacular

haha wow

John Evans

It's low tide. Really, really low tide.

MePerson

what's with the stars & hearts?

doofusgumby

@Con Seannery:
Comment system fails
To accent the fine details
of commenting tales

It needs work, you claim
the old puts the new to shame
The new system? LAME

Thread offtopic, cheers!
How the Fuck Did We Get Here?
now we persevere

rhyming haikus -> Tough
Current comment system -> Rough
Think I've had enough.


Edit: line breaks suck
Automate them now, you schmuck
Delivery truck.

psychiccheese

@Geisrud:
I will try haiku
For my Gizmodo comments
From now on. Thank you.

psychiccheese

@Geisrud: That aid to navigation on the starboard side of the vessel means that there's safe water to the south ... he's obviously on the north!

redpoint

@MF350z:[IMG]http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b148/PhredG/TBBS_special/unexplainable.jpg[/IMG]

@Geisrud: Not so, sir! I have employed limericks, plenty of free verse poetry, and at some point you may see a sonnet!

Con Seannery

Quickly! Drop the anchor before we drift off on these rocks!

SkippyTheMarine

@psychiccheese:
But alas, this new comment system,
Almost insured that I missed 'em!
Gawker, I beg, I implore of thee,
Bring back the old system to set us free!
Page two is a risky endeavor,
That may trap your comments forever,
As sure as that boat is up on a rocks,
And as sure as your comment disappears from the box,
Gizmodians must rise up, must say "Nay!"
Reject this new system, not here, not today!

Con Seannery

@ShawnYawn: I think... a small part of me... just died...

He did the Free Willy thing ... fail

Carlo Gaudreault

@NurseDave: You know you're just refueling his urea powered star, right?

m4ximusprim3

Ok, drunk boating is never a good idea! Just leave the boat keys at the bar sir!

@DayWeSpilledThePaint_GitEmSteveDave: Indeed, there is no way something that size can be useful for anything other than undergarments. Would probably explode if one attempted something like a Nite Owl costume.

Bermuda Triangle.

@92BuickLeSabre: Best developer catch phrase ever!

I've seen this after 3 hurricanes. The water level goes up 10 feet, that boat draws something 4 or 5 feet then the water drops again and you are left with a funny picture.

fastm3driver

I'm on a boat, I'm on a boat, I'm on a motherfu*(ing boat!! It's on the rocks, It's on the rocks, the boat is on the motherf*(ing rocks!!! - you get the idea!!

Jorge Bandrich

@Lite: is on a boat.: There there. *hands tissue*

MisterWho Cares

Its called running aground at high tide (see the water marks on the concrete column)...then the tide rolls out. Why it is still standing straight up is a mystery. The keel which is very strong and weighs as much as the rest of the boat must really be wedged into those rocks.

SurupaGabynoodle

Simple: James Bond asked for a Martini on the Rocks, but the bartender was partly deaf and delivered him a Dingy instead. Regarding: "The rest of use are allowed to say any stupid thing we want." -- From the Careful What You Ask For Department.

bustedchain

@Lite: is on a boat.: A negative reply button is an interesting idea, but something tells me they don't want to give us that much power.

That's an anchored vessel that was set up shop at high tide. Now it's at low tide. It's pretty amazing that the keel can take that weight though!

silyman1

Geisrud is closer to right than the rest. If you look at the algae line on the 'aid to navigation' (the concrete thing with a light on it), you will note that it is quite high. This tells us that the boat sailed there when the tide was high, and then when the tide fell, the boat was left "on the hard". But, given the fact that fenders are set on the port side, it's possible that the boat was moored or anchored, and came loose during a storm, and then came to rest there after the storm was over and the tide had fallen.

@citizen024: Yes, looks like a mini-singer. Pussy kids today. Back in my day, we used to carry around the old metal Singers!

@Geisrud: sorry, I need some formatting help

@Con Seannery: I don't know what kind of fancy, new fangled rhyming you guys are doing up there, but Gizmodo is strictly a haiku venue:

The rocks came up fast Cartography really sucks I'll wait it out here

Seems clear to me that they let out too much rope when they dropped anchor

@92BuickLeSabre: the thing in his hand looks like (and probably is) a sewing machine.

Welcome to the Pearl.

The best part is that they put the bumpers out. Excuse me Captain but it's not the port side that's got a problem... No, not starboard either.

thelastnamehere