10 Ways To Make Your Keyboard Slightly Less Disgusting

Two words: Windex Wipes. Amazing product. (throw a pack in your laptop case), great for grimy wires too.

JakeSlatnesky

@alphanumeric1971:

Yep. Works best for coffee/soda spills.

If you have a keyboard with LCDs, then you are probably screwed.

@OMG! Ponies!: wow...thats all i have to say. i'll admit that's pretty rockin though.

Joseph_Shaw_520

@mikeness: Maybe they've all been tested?

NurseDave

@Curves: Don't worry, I'm pretty sure it's your stuff.

**remember** If it's wet and it's not yours, don't touch it.

NurseDave

@Curves: I usually hold mine above my head and look up while I try to shake everything out.

@Noobs-R-Us:

here ya go folks...the original Daddy Big Bucks...

fastharry

@OMG! Ponies!: It's always great to recycle. :P

GundamX67

I use a silicone keyboard cover. Had the old G4 Mac keyboard with a clear body and black keys... I've seen some that look like an Ebola breeding ground on the inside. With the cover, mine is still spotless. I got one for my aluminum thin keyboard for the MacPros, and couldn't be happier. Wash it off once a week and I'm good, plus it dampens the sound of typing late at nite.

motionmonk

@alphanumeric1971:
Try it! :D

Aneurism

Bang it out. Then hit it with 409 or some kind of spray on cleaner. Wipe vigorously with a dry paintbrush followed by a wipe-down with a paper towel. Good as new.

Can you really do the old "dishwasher" thing anymore? especially with keyboards that have LCD's etc in them?

alphanumeric1971

The older white Mac keyboards with the clear sides are th WORST for getting crap stuck under the keys, since you can see everything. But all you need is a small flathead screwdriver and you can pop the keys off, then take some compressed air and get the rest of the crap out.

I know there are a few companies selling silicone covers for Mac keyboards for about $20-25...

@yungjerry703: I would bring a keyboard condom to work with me if I ever had to share with multiple people.

here's a remedy to keep your keyboard looking sweet: quit playing wow. all that strafing has caught up to you, good sir.

worst. giz commenter. ever.

my work keyboard is being used by someone 24 hours a day. breakfast lunch and dinner are eaten over it. its so fucking filthy! i put hand sanitizer on my hands like 10 times a day.

@dsh: Duh. You don't BUY a new one.

Whenever someone quits, the next morning, you go into their office/cubicle and scrounge. It's how I got a steel Swingline stapler, a matching set of in/out trays, and a sand-weighted Scotch-brand tape dispenser with spindle.

It's the Circle of Life.

@Noobs-R-Us: Geez, what kind of multi-billion dollar megacorp do you work at that you can afford to replace a perfectly good $11 keyboard every 2 years?!

I bang mine out every week. I then take the little white flakes and put them into a container.

Every few months, I use it to build a little ski slope at me desk and make my Lando Calrissian action figure do ski jumps on it.

@Curves: Sometimes I also flip mine around and smack it on the desk until stuff comes out. I even do it with my keyboard sometimes too.

@Curves: Might not want to try that with a laptop ;)

That's easy, just replace it every 2-3 years. There, problem solved!

Noobs-R-Us

@Curves: I believe the technical term is "keyboard chow".

dingus

Why not just get a washable keyboard?

I hate my office keyboard. The damn thing is filthy, and no matter how many times I upend-and-whack it, the amount of hair falling never seems to decrease.

USB_Humping_Dog

At least once a week, I flip mine over and bang it on the edge of the desk to get "stuff" out. I dont know what the stuff that comes out of there is, nor do I really want to know.

@SupaPhly: This should be the picture of the post, DAMN

@atlasfugged: GodDAMMIT.

@OMG! Ponies!: Um...I...uh...I believe you have my stapler.

@Noobs-R-Us: Or you could simply buy an IBM model M keyboard and throw it in the dishwasher.

mGARANDEUR1

@SupaPhly: For the love of god. Was that found in a North Carolina sewer?

atlasfugged

@OMG! Ponies!: I believe you have my stapler.

atlasfugged

@32ndnote: lol

FEAST YOUR EYES!
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If there's a film building up, some gentle work with a vinyl eraser will take it off and not leave a more visible film like rubbing alcohol.

@alphanumeric1971: No LCD on mine, but I do occasionally take the squirty hose thing from the sink and give the keyboard a good hosin with hot water. After that, I put it in front of this high power blowy thing I acquired somewhere for 1/2 an hour and good as new. Been doing it for 6 years now.

Magic Eraser works wonders on my laptops and keyboards. But you need a slim keyboard to do it, it makes it look like new again!

jerNELS

I took care of that dirty problem by buying the new Mac keyboard (the slim metal one). The keys are so tightly put on the board that there's no way in hell you can accumulate shit in there. There's no more 4 inch high keys with 2 inch space in-between where you could snack on if you whack it on your desk. It works flawlessly with a PC and if you need to remap some keys, just use SharpKeys.

Cleaning it is only a matter of spraying Windex on a lint-free towel and wipe the shit off. Good as new !

@mfokp: Throw in some tomato and egg whites and you have yourself a nice little consommé.

@skeksis: i don't even wait for them to be "dead".. i just wait till they have that listless uncaring look and slowly weaken there defenses by "borrowing" their calculator and pens....

hoffmanbike

@nikonratm: yup - or a store brand knock off.

The single best thing to ever happen to keyboard cleaning is the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser... it will change your life. Trust.

nikonratm

@Noobs-R-Us: pubs = pubes. LOL

Noobs-R-Us

@skeksis: You clearly don't understand how office life works. You pilfer from the dead and then sterilize using the supplies in the kitchenette. Plus, every receptionist has Windex and Clorox Wipes.

You don't think that offices actually buy new handset cords, do you? Everyone just cannibalizes old parts. Need a bulletin board? Take it from the dearly departed. Need white-out or Sharpies? Check the desk. Post-its and flags? Desk drawer organizers? This is how offices work.

We're all vultures.

@skeksis: Speaking of someone else's keyboard, let me tell you about the time I became the replacement for some beautiful blond woman who was fired for spending too much time planning her wedding. I found blond pubs on her keyboard! I didn't know if I should haven been excited or disgusted at the time.

Noobs-R-Us

anyone know how to take off the shiny of the keyboard? my macbook's keys if i remember correctly weren't shiny but now they are o.o

LinkinPain

@OMG! Ponies!: Meanwhile, your co-workers do the same thing, and sprinkle it at crimes scenes. Sadly, they didn't realize Gataca was a movie, in the loosest definition of the world.

@alphanumeric1971: I tried that once with a plain keyboard, just rinsing it off under the tap. It was still never the same after that.

Or just send them to me! :D I make a living refurbishing to a like-new condition all sorts of keyboards, including the old IBM Model M keyboards (and the green screen terminals that go with them).

If I can't take all the caps off to wash them in the sink, then I use a spray-bottle of really diluted mild detergent, a stiff nylon brush, a toothbrush, rags, Q-tips, and ton of compressed air. Then it's just a matter of scrubbing and detailing. And a ton of compressed air.

Warning: Disgusting Ahead

After cleaning a bujillion keyboards, I've seen just about everything: the standard soda and coffee baths of course, fingernails and toenails, boogers, snails and slugs, mice droppings and dead mice, hairballs the size of a small moon, several flavors of vomit, frying grease, motor oil, cooked hamburger beef complete with trimmings, rotten raw hamburger (but no maggots thankfully)... there really is no need to continue, is there?

mfokp

@OMG! Ponies!: Ew, so then you have to deal with someone else's disgusting keyboard? No thanks.

I saw a really cool foldable portable rubber USB keyboard for like $15 at a store and it seemed like it worked really good.

TurboTexas

@mikeness: I C what you did there.

TurboTexas