It almost looks like the NES Power Glove

se7a7n7

I take offense to the words "Gauntlet" and "Printer"

odnet

wow a cumming printer - this has gone too far!

reactionsok

@spider2544: Who?

qbrad

@spider2544: So I wasn't the only one that read it like that. Good...

waveman216

nsfw title

tsvb

that package in the back of the picture is my zombie extermination ray

enchantedgoose

if its that kind of printer, we will see a fetish video with paris hilton in a couple months im sure.

spider2544

that sir is no pipboy 3000

thechansen

Why, oh why is it "wearable"?

newgalactic

@newgalactic: Why, oh why did it take this long?

Every step we get closer to a full on Varia suit, the better.

Kharnellius

@Kakkoister: but a chance a burned out paper
oh wait... that's ash (ketchum from pallet town)

TBM-Fan

@Kakkoister: And how do you power said laser for very long?

bagellord

@Kakkoister: eXtreme!!!!

UofITom

Why not make it a laser based system?

Save a hell of a lot of money without needing ink. And you'll be burning the information onto the packages with extreme precision.

Kakkoister

@toaste: Well lah-dee-dah. Looks like someone's been watchin' the Learnin' Channel.

jk

se7a7n7

The ignorance has gone far enough:

Cum, is from the Latin meaning "with." In English it usually indicates a thing that's been repurposed or modified to give it some non-traditional use. Here our "Gauntlet-cum-printer" is a gauntlet-with-printer, or a gauntlet transformed into a printer.

Quit surfing porn and read something, people.

toaste

@MBPro: that just gave me a good 5min laugh

segamanxero

OK, so if I understand it correctly... UPS cums on the packages now?

MBPro

@GreyHammer: college boy? more like stuck-up snob.

MBPro

@GreyHammer:

LOL!

:D

GrantH

@Kakkoister: Yeah... It would burn through it. Unless you're shipping apples. I've seen laser burned apples.

RevolutionMaster

@toaste: What? Who said porn?

jfreel

@toaste: looks like we gots a college boy

GreyHammer

@thechansen: So, I guess you never did the quest that upgraded your Pipboy in the ruins, eh, thechansen?

hhumbert

@MBPro: more like people should learn some vocabulary.

Mr.DuckSauce

@MagnoliaBoy: Thanks, just choked on my coffee...

USB_Humping_Dog

Seriously, hook that up to a hot Asian chick, stat! ...Googling 'Hot Asian Cum Printer' now...

MagnoliaBoy

@Mr.DuckSauce: please. it's a joke. this is gizmodo. to call it ignorance is really sad.

MBPro

I'm actually impressed. I thought it would be a silly gimmick, but judging by this demo video, it looks to be solid and prints quickly on pretty much any surface. I can see how this would be extremely useful for the likes of UPS/FedEx, etc.

I actually want one for myself.. damn I wish I had a reason to get one.

[h30423.www3.hp.com]

Evodico

ill, cum.

nuggetz

And I just had a job interview at UPS too. :)

Hintzyboy

@MagnoliaBoy: It's funnier to apply the actual meaning to that, and imagine how someone managed to turn an Asian into a printer...

macserv

@MBPro: I lol'd. Alot.

bemused0

@MBPro: Now?

macserv

@toaste: Actually, in this sense, it's being used to denote a second (unexpected) description of the object which didn't apply before.

E.g.: Say someone drove lost control of their car and it veered into oncoming traffic. It would be pandemonium as drivers veered to avoid the sedan-cum-projectile-weapon.

macserv

not really related, but yesterday i checked the status of a package i sent via UPS and it said it had experienced an exception. The current official status said "TRAIN DERAILMENT"

shorty6049

Now we just need to send things to a person and not a street address. Introducing the permanent, virtual address:

+ Watch video

William

rather than teleporting the PACKAGE wouldn't it be more GREEN to teleport the item?

detach

@Hintzyboy: Did they ask you to practice their new procedure?

MBPro

@newgalactic: I guess you've never worked UPS. These are wearable cause the guys loading the boxes in the semi trailers (aka Feeders) stack the boxes so they don't shift their weight and bust open the sides of the trailer on a turn. So as the packages (aka soon to be squished victims) are pushed into the truck via conveyor... you don't have time to run to the back of the truck to scan the box and then to front and stack it. If you think this was bad you should see the ones they used to use.

These are also lighter, I'm sure, and will keep fatigue to a minimum.

Hopefully it can withstand the ridiculous summer heat, all 130+ degrees of it (and sweat too).

timbuckto

First off. Everbody knows what the latin 'Cum' means. As in 'Magna Cum Laude'. That's not the issue here. The real issue is this: Where do they get all that cum from?!?

Shai

um, I rather not, say; a what printer, I my, who ever thought about this contraption might have been in a lube vent with some mamalita before gasping for some releif or something for a wearable printer and all, I don't know, it's like making love to a box but with a mobile thing attached to you like your escorting it while it's frying hot in and baking like a lap danse or something. lol.

StealthNinja

@se7a7n7: It's so bad.

Spartan1308™

Next please: Decent drivers, showing up on time, and not completely destroying your package (especially when labeled fragile).

darthsaber10

@Shai: I understood it to mean that it only printed the word CUM, this could revolutionize juvenile defacement of property!

Chameleon7

@hhumbert: You can upgrade your pipboy!? Awesome. *Goes to google*

-Core-

That is great UPS found away to get rid of paper in the labeling system but you need to understand that a 40,000-box sample with zero errors is small potatoes in the total amount of total packages they ship in a day. I should know I am an ex-driver who was told to leave boxes at houses unscanned and days late from when they should have been delivered. They also lie about how many errors they get when it comes down to keeping the customers happy. To top things off most employees that handle packages (non-drivers) are young kids and ex-cons who do not care about the packages. I have seen employee play kickball with boxes. The best boxes to do that were marked fragile. That is why I try not to ship anything through UPS or buy items shipped with them.

CourtneyCepheus

What they don't tell you is after those first 40,000 error free prints is that the next 20,000 were screwed up. It is HP after all...

ikiru71

I used to work for a major shipping provider and let me tell you wearing that scanner on your arm is a huge step in protecting the family jewels.

I read a warning label on the scanner one day warning that it emitted radiation. I stopped wearing that on my hip from then on. Now I know a lot of things emit radiation but you rarely see any warning labels on the devices.

Mikestan

What no ink spewing video?

Tacomstng

@hhumbert: Wait. Seriously?

Numerous

@thechansen: oh you clever, wiley troublemaker. there's no quest to upgrade your pipboy in some ruins!

stre

UPS Boss: "Hey Gadge, where you goin', it's not break time yet!"

GadgetPlay: "I'll be back in a minute, I need to refill my Cum-Printer."

Boss: "I hope your aim's better than last time!"

Comrade GadgetPlay, Fellow Traveler

@toaste: STFU.@StealthNinja: Gibber much?

Comrade GadgetPlay, Fellow Traveler

@toaste: Excuse me while I go change my sheets...I got "with" all over them!

FiveLiters

@spider2544: And if you thought sourceing the replacement cartridge for an ink-jet was messy...

FiveLiters

I work in a library and I wonder how this might streamline several of our procedures. With this, perhaps we could truly decentralize the check-out process, while simplifying the return and inter-branch transfer processes.

The only issue I have (and this applies only to our situation here) is the printing. We've stopped stamping the return dates on the books and now print a single receipt, so we would have to consider going back to that in some manner.

hnkelley

@toaste: Oh don't do that, you'll just make them mad.

Killjoy