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10 Gadgets to Help You Survive the Oncoming Depression-Caused Apocalypse

Posted by Adam Frucci at 4:00 AM on October 3, 2008

Well, things aren't looking too great economy-wise. We might just be headed for a depression, which means you'll need to start changing your lifestyle. While you may start out by changing your lifestyle in subtle ways, you need to be mentally prepared for the fact that more, well, drastic measures may be necessary in the not-too-distant future. Luckily, I've hand-picked 10 gadgets that may be necessary in our frightening, Lehman-Brothersless future.


10. The first thing you're gonna want to do is start saving money. This Tomy RPG Piggy Bank makes saving money fun by featuring a simple game on the front that utilises the money you insert into it. Make saving a game, you'll be more apt to do it! [Link]

9. A good way to save money is to stop using so much electricity. This energy saving remote lets you cut the power to all of your home theatre electronics that suck up juice even when they're off. This should save you precious dollars every month. [Link]

8. Not everyone will be as responsible as you, and they may get desperate and try to steal your precious financial documents. Keep them locked up in this really intense hard drive/safe combo. It's fireproof and waterproof, so you can be sure nothing will happen to your data. [Link]

Sequiam%20BioLock.jpg7. It's not just your digital property that you need to protect, its your physical property as well. This lock uses your fingerprint to allow access, so only you and your family will be able to get into your house when the looting and rioting begin. [Link]

6. OK, so they've cut the power to your home and you've barricaded yourself inside. You obviously can't go to the grocery store for food as all of the stores have been overtaken by roving bands of weapons-wielding former stock brokers, so you should ensure you've got plenty of non-perishable food to last you through the financial crisis. [Link]


5. So they set your house on fire, forcing you to flee into the woods. What you'll need is a tent that's quick to set up and quick to pack up when you hear the sounds of the bloodthirsty brokers crashing through the underbrush. This self-pitching tent sets itself up in the air as you throw it, allowing you to set up camp quickly and easily. [Link]

VE0622.jpg4. You'll want to be able to know the weather and charge your phone while you're on the run, and this is the device to do it for you. Assuming the national weather services haven't been overrun and destroyed, you'll be able to check on the forecast while charging your gadgets with this. [Link]

rhino.jpg image3. You need to escape the city, where all the former bankers are based, and since cars are susceptible to bombs and rocket launchers, you'll need something a bit more tough. The Rhino can withstand just about anything that's thrown at it and keep you and whatever is left of your family safe inside. [Link]

2. OK, so you needed to get out of the Rhino and dole out some punishment man-to-man. This recoilless auto shotgun can fire off 300 rounds per minute, making quick work of anyone with a blue shirt with white cuffs flecked with human blood around. Just make sure to pick up plenty of extra ammo while you're at it. [Link]

digital_tombstone.jpg1. So you didn't make it. That's disappointing! You can at least leave a lasting memorial to yourself with your last near-worthless American dollars by purchasing this digital tombstone with your dying breath. It can display videos on its LCD monitor of you in happier times, buying gasoline for less than $US150 a gallon and owning a house that actually has some value. Maybe in heaven things will be like that again. For your sake, I hope so. [Link] [Top image via Pink Tentacle]

Tags: economy | feature | gadgets | lists | meltdown | panic | top

 

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