@Sixxtwo: are you referring to Hanes and Fruit of the Loom? :P

jk but i totally agree... trust me I spelled their name "micro$oft" for years. And perhaps after google comes out on top, it'll do the same thing apple is doing. Dont know, but i hope not.

Shub-Niggurath

@OMG! Ponies!: Man, you are really stuck on this NYT app? I still use safari and with your endorsement I shall continue.

Forge on NYT!

(How could David Pogue let NYT's app be such a failure?)

Late_Night

@lldsandsll: my calculus professors name is Dr. Gang Wang. I lol irl every day.

Blinklink11

@logicalnoise: Great. So then the every iteration of FAIL in the NYTimes App will lead to another iteration of FAIL. It's like a nautilus of garbage.

OMG! Ponies!

@Shub-Niggurath: I remember some company like that. They were big, and blue.... Then this little company came along, with a cute fruit logo.

hmmmm

Sixxtwo

God damn Flowcharts

pinball21

Why do they keep Apps with flatulence sounds out of the App Store?

joandrade

@Joseph: wow that pretty much sums up fundies as well.

logicalnoise

FUD

paja

@OMG! Ponies!: maybe a mandlebrot set graph is in order?

logicalnoise

lame

Neone

lol, they said wang

lldsandsll

This is a core issue with apple, they will never let go of the money train and allow 3rd party developers to write applications without being taxed and filtered.

keepr

Apple reminds me of some of my bothers MIT classmates. Really smart, but horrible communication skills. They make great products but it seems like they don't want to actually give the customer what they want. They want you to see it how they see it and do it how they want you to do it. Anything out of line is sub par.

Joseph

*cough*cough*ANDROID!!!*cough*

seriously though, i just got a shuffle, which requires itunes, which required me to register for some bullshit "iStore" or something JUST to download album art for my library.

How does this comment relate to this post? Simple, I hate what apple has become. A nickle-and-diming secretive mega-corp.

Shub-Niggurath

I think this is the article they were trying to link to. [bits.blogs.nytimes.com]

Abnormal

This Diagram looks like a version of a "Bejeweled" type of game. LOL

Faslane66

It's less funny when it's trufax. :(

Substance_D

Where's the decision box for "Can we file off the serial numbers and sell it ourselves?"

AmishJohn

you are winner...ha ha ha

discounteggroll

That would suck to put time and effort into your application only to find that Apple deems it unworthy for placement in the AppStore. I'm not sure what this Podcasting app does, but I'm not sure how it competes with the iTunes podcasting section, unless the Podcasting app allows you to get podcasts from a source other than iTunes...

anti-hello-kitty

Is that apple's secret algorithm for programming? because that looks more complicated than what i had to learn in C or C++, even assembly. =\

aznguy1011

Lol thats great :D

Jon B.

It left out this part:

"Is it still bug-ridden after two months"->Yes->"Is it made by a major corporation"->Yes

And so the NYTimes App was born.

That's okay, NYTimes. I didn't want to actually read your political coverage. I just want to press the button to get your political coverage.

The blank screen makes an excellent flashlight.

OMG! Ponies!

Spot on.

DarkHavoc99

Yeah, the whole podcaster thing SUCKS! I've been waiting for that app for a while now. Used to have something like that when i jailbroke my 1.1.4 phone! That's messed up apple... rotten apple!

grem28

Your John Gruber link is busted.

Franklin Comes Alive!

I sort of imagine that the real chart is just a big spiral of arrows that goes towards the center, with Steve's face in it. Like a sunflower...of rejection.

Kaiser-Machead on the Edge

Hahah, is it a Flashlight? Hilarious.

IKEACAR

This is awesome

ALT

@SkoGoody:
Lol Steve Doesnt care that you hate apple, you already own or owned an iPhone. That was the mission. Rest is unimportant.

vgart

@SkoGoody:

Yes, because Jobs is up in his big office in Cupertino just laughing and being evil as he reads your post on his MacBook tablet with 128gig SSD running a 4ghz chip that would only cost $1,000 to make.

Right.

jwm1314

YES YES YES !!!! LOLing on the floorz

vgart

I think this is one of those shitty things Apple will regret doing and later reverse their decision. They do do that, on occasion ;-p

@Shub-Niggurath:

You bought an iPod not knowing it requires iTunes? And no, you don't need to have an iTMS account (which doesn't cost anything, btw) to just use it. If you want the unbelievable convenience of being able to automatically download cover art for your ripped and downloaded CDs, then yes, you need an account. Which, again, is free. And you're complaining about that, and on top of it, use that as the proof that Apple is evil? Wow.

Dearhaw

[blog.dreamhost.com]

delmuerte

Hilarious and true. Although, there are several apps that I do love, that DO work, and ARE useful. But the even more useful apps lie out of my reach due to Apple's strict rules...

Seinosuke

I have an iPhone and I can honestly say that I HATE Apple and Steve Jobs!

I'm so sick of their arrogance, their smugness, their lockdown of all that is innovative. Apple has turned into everything it used to despise. Now they are the ones trying to control, "what people want and what people like." Steve Jobs is a modern day technology Nazi... destroying all innovation that he does not deem important enough or good enough for his almighty race of Macs and iPhone/iPods.

To that, I say FUCK YOU APPLE. I will continue to jailbreak my phone where I have the ability to take full advantage of the tech my iPhone has to offer. And make it as fully useable and customizable as possible.

I absolutely can not wait until Android comes along on a phone comparable to the iPhone and Curb Stomps Apple into oblivion.

SkoGoody

This is actually REALLY important. For the first time I'm really worried that I should've waited for Android.

2.1 update really fixed all of my issues but the future doesn't look too good if this shit continues.

future-proof

@Late_Night: I just want to read the Political column on the PATH train. It shouldn't be this hard.

OMG! Ponies!

They forgot "Is it a tip calculator?" If yes, then approve. If no, continue on the chart.

bitgod

@Franklin Comes Alive!: Thanks, fixed.

matt buchanan

Welcome fanboys to your little filtered fruit shaped world. :)

I knew the bottom would fall out at some point.

keepr

@vgart: The rest is important. I don't think you believe Apple's single mission was to hope people would buy the first iPhone and that's it. Everything else is un-important...

Oh contraries my good friend. The rest is the most important of all. Being a Windows guy my entire life, I never really cared for anything Apple was really doing. However, the iPhone, it was Apple's biggest innovation ever that revolutionized the cellphone. So much in fact, that it had Windows users investigating and even switching to the Apple side to see what Apple was really all about.

Even more, once you got an iPhone... guess what, you needed to get iTunes too(to activate it). iTunes, a program I always despised... but learned to like now that I "had" to use it. Apple was on the right path... It had me thinking that maybe Windows was on its way out... Maybe Apple was as cool as all those "hipsters" made it seem.

EH! WRONG! Apple has shown its true colors since this phone has came out and I will never, ever think of buying another Apple product again. I'm sure, that, my friend, was the real goal of Apple... They had their chance to turn me and they FAILed, miserably.

SkoGoody

@trendspotter: How 'chill' would you be if you be if you just invested 8 weeks of company time, employees and money coding something that doesn't get accepted? Even though you followed all of the Apple stipulations.

Then the chilling out continues when it does get approved and sells like hotcakes, but then Big Fruity says 'we provide the same function anyway' and pulls your app(podcaster). Now you have to re-adjust your entire account practices and company outlook due to the new gaping hole in your stream of revenue.

Ohh ya chill....Mr. cool ice chilled....

/endrant
//all in fun

Sixxtwo

hilarious!

nEmmY

@Dearhaw: Yes. I like winamp. Is that so bad? I BOUGHT the damn iPod so that I could use it as I wished.

Shub-Niggurath

Wow, lots of hate going on in this thread. Chill out people. Seriously.

I'm getting a little impatient, however, because it seems the app approval process is a real bottleneck. I've been waiting for a week for an update to "Divide ToDo," (great potential here, btw) which is supposedly in queue for Apple's approval. I like the app, but I'm really excited for the upcoming features; so it's like waiting for Christmas, but not knowing when it will happen. grr.

trendspotter

Made my day a little brighter :D Thanks Giz!

jlindenbaum

@Abnormal: Hey thanks, hadn't seen it since I've not been on planet earth for the last couple days (you'll see why soon). Weird that we both used the word "capricious." Coincidence?

matt buchanan

Seems like a fair description of Appl€'s control schema. IMO Goog£e isn't nearly as evil. Perhaps that's what makes them dangerous.

misterwho

The 3 flashlight apps I have always seem to never be touched, speaking of which I'm just going to delete them now.

TehPath

I love the list... Maybe we should just make this our iphone backgrounds and whenever we go to the Apple store the employee's won't be able to say anything. Maybe that will give them the message... or not.

Sam_Zebian

The real question is: Do you have this chart as an iPhone app?

Bokusatsu_Tenshi

@Sixxtwo: It does say in apples developer guidelines:

"
3.3.3 Without Apple's prior written approval, an Application may not provide, unlock or enable additional features or functionality through distribution mechanisms other than the iTunes Store.
"

Which is the category that this technically falls into. Why they want such a lock on the distribution is beyond me, but i guess that's where they are #1, whereas hardware they strive to innovate because they aren't.

tarzan69

@Shub-Niggurath:

No, it's not bad that you like Winamp. I used to use Winamp on my PC. I used to use the Mac clone of Winamp -- Macamp -- when it was pretty much the only MP3 player that ran on Macs.

Just saying, if I picked up a Zune and bitched here about how it can't be used with iTunes (my music library of choice now), and moreover, that I can't even use it with my Mac, and not only that, used that as basis for calling Microsoft "evil", then... well, you know what people would say, don't you?

Dearhaw

This is why I switched back to Palm. Can't wait for the Treo 690!

okeribok

I have an iPhone but I will give it up the second another product comes along that doesn't play "big brother" over what I choose to load onto it, even if it's a bit harder to use. I'm plain sick of Apple's hardware lockdown that only lets me load files from only one of my Macs and threatens to erase all my media if I so much as try to load a jpeg from my second laptop while travelling. I don't like the WiFi sharing limitations Apple is trying to usher in with the MacBook Air nor the optical drive lockdown. I can't stand the fact they keep updating iTunes with marketing schemes vainly disguised as features without allowing me to turn those features completely off. I will never buy an iPod, AppleTV, or buy a single media file from iTunes until these BS policies are stopped.

I am really hoping the Google phone will be as open as they say.

Brau

@Dearhaw:An iTunes account might not cost anything... except your credit card info. You cant start an account without one!

Blakamin

where is the random number generator that determines how many days they wait before spending 10 minutes deciding on whether to approve it or not? as far as i can tell it has a lower bounds of 5 days and no upper bounds.

IMFletcher

@tarzan69: Thats easy, they will probably start charging a cost for over-wifi syncing, rather than having to dock it. That app just beat them to it. So it had to go! =D

Sixxtwo

@Blakamin:

That's true, and yes, that is one thing you have to give up to get the convenience of automatic downloading of cover art. With iTMS being the size it is, it makes it a very compelling service.

However, you can always opt out... or rather, choose not to opt in. After all, there are plenty of ways to get album art (go to Amazon.com, or download one of the dozens of apps out there that automatically downloads album art for you).

So again, why does that make Apple evil?

I'm not saying Apple is NOT evil (in the sense that all corporations are pretty much evil); just that what he's complaining about is not a good basis to make that judgment.

Dearhaw

So True

TF2Soldier914

This is why Android will, eventually at least, be the superior phone. Because its not made by Apple.

wills916