Hey! This reminds me of an old DOS game called "Sim Ant" that I used to play!

Josh_Geyer

we had a similar problem with an old HP Office Jet (the first one) After my dad killed a few ants and they made a huge mess, he found out that they were, for some reason, living off of the ink in the ink cartridges!

danmandle

Wow that is a high tech ant farm.
An enterprising company could sell something like this hehe.

zed0

Coud be worse...a spider could've laid eggs in there...

Nykwil

@noodles90: I believe the exact expression for just this sort of situation good sir is: KILL IT WITH FIRE

@DeadWriter: +1 UHF reference.

Vastad

@shorty63136:

Dude, bugs is bad enough... but bugs running around carrying bulbous white eggs... yeeeeeech! Bleeeech!

Serolf Divad

Those are huge ants. Huge. I would just... move out of the house. Can't stand the thought of them being in everything.

pearl

I thought, oh, it's just ants. Ants are ok bugs.

But no. That's freaking gross.

justhesh

That video gave me the Jibblies. Those ants are huge!

"Ahh! Someone's tapping the glass! Scatter the colony!"

judacris

yeah ive heard of Roaches living inside an CRT monitor..this just happens that with insects because they enjoy warm dry crevices.Also some insects are attracted to electric static current thus this could be the result.

wilkart

I guess it goes to show how much the average household scanner actually gets used.

Hardcore1

Sell it on EBAY, buy new scanner printer. Plenty geeks would love a high-tech ant farm. Simply stick it in a terrarium, seal the edges, drop a piece of bread in there daily...

Ghede

Wonder if this is near Houston. In addition to evil fireants, they apparently have an issue with crazy ants that enjoy eating electronics as well.

[www.huffingtonpost.com]

NightElfMohawk

I'd place a garbage bag around the whole damn mess and throw it in the trash. I don't use a printer or scanner anyway. That's what work is for.

IndustrialJones

@Curves: The thing with that is, some insects just go into a sort of suspended animation when they get that cold. Warm 'em back up and they're rarin' to go!

FredicvsMaximvs

@Joseph: psst - try this one, from the movie Stand By Me:

+ Watch video

FredicvsMaximvs

Sorry for the last YouTube link. I meant this:

+ Watch video

Bokusatsu_Tenshi

Place printer in plastic bag. Place bag in freezer. Retrive next day. Vac dead ants out.
(Right after you run screaming in terror from finding that mess.)

Curves

Considering it seems a pretty expensive HP combo printer, here's what I would do:

+ Watch video

Bokusatsu_Tenshi

Crazy!
If 'twere cold outside, I think I'd just set the unit out on the deck or something for a few days. The ants would likely move their burgeoning colony to a more warm and hospitable place, like underground.

That might also work with it being really hot outside, but I don't really know how ants think.

I do know they don't like being exposed, having once found a big colony like this in my parents' mailbox. So in that case, I'd take the thing outside on a lovely day and remove every cover, lid, etc. that it's possible to remove. If yu take away all the "walls" of their "house," they'll move out and find a better one.

My thinking is that by encouraging them to move out on their own, you won't be left with a printer that's all gakked up with dead ants and larvae and bug spray.

FredicvsMaximvs

@Matthew Hughes: Same here.

I WANTED SCANNED ANTS DAMNIT!

Dakota Courtois

Keep Printing...

ziggieboi

OOps..forgot the terminator bug....[www.propellercode.com]

BiZarRroBALlmeR

clearly you need a terminator bug to go in there and mercilessly shoot those ants with automatic weapons.

BiZarRroBALlmeR

He should get a monkey with a stick.

DG

@Hiphopopotamus: Nice nice... I was going to see your barf-o-rama and raise you the SNL - Rookie Cop Skit, but it appears YouTube has removed all of the SNL skits :(. I fold :).

Joseph

find an opening to reach behind the glass, grab a can of duster and open fire with the can upside-down

xeijix

*wheels into the other room to check his HP Photosmart 2570 AIO*

alin0steglinski

a friends mother had this exact thing happen to her scanner/fax/printer combo thingo...
they love the always-on and warm components

took us about 90 minutes to clean out (mostly) and, would you believe it, it worked like a charm afterwords.
maybe squished ant bodies provide and excellent low-friction lubricant as I believe it was also quieter after ant-removal procedures were carried out

HoboSapien

@Hiphopopotamus: OK, I will raise you a Mr. Creosote.
[www.youtube.com]

bms

First I'd scan...

Then I'd probably scan some more... Maybe upside down so they are all sitting on the glass instead of being mushed by the scan bar...

Then I'd probably gas the ants and clean it out..... I imagine it would still work :/

JuiceDaddy

I see the tile and the ants, and I think it's one of those non-geeks who put their computer in the kitchen. "It's just a tool, I just use it to check my email and print directions..."

Just a tool indeed.

markarian

Well, one day I left a small bottle of honey in a plastic bag on the same desk where my laptop was. Then in the next day, I noticed some ants were around the bottle inside the bag but didn't care at all. I just removed the insects, cleaned everything and put the bottle in the kitchen.

Few minutes later I decided to watch a movie so I took my laptop and when I opened its lid I had a HUGE surprise. A LOT of ants were inside the laptop. I just couldn't believe it. I've never seem something like that.

I had to turn my laptop upside down and shook it many times in order to remove all those ants. Surprisingly, it worked fine when I removed them but I could still find some of them a week later.

Tiago Sartor

ebay it...

Mqmq4190

Is that covered by he warranty?

bms

I'd take it outside, plug it in, pour flameable liquid on/in it it, light it, then hit the "copy" button.

Josh_Geyer

@Joseph: I'll see your Family Guy and raise you one piece of good media:

+ Watch video

Hiphopopotamus

03:14, restate my assumptions:
1. Mathematics is the language of nature.
2. Everything around us can be represented and understood through numbers.
3. If you graph these numbers, patterns emerge.
Therefore: There are patterns everywhere in nature.

DeadWriter

completely disgusting... who hangs their red velvet curtains in the same room where they use the green tiled-top table as a double-headed computer station?

i'm going to have nightmares now.

LedburyLongshot

What the CRAP?!?!

I'm with 92BuickLeSabre - I'd be losing my lunch.

I
DON'T
DO
BUGS!

Not INSIDE the house, at least. Outside? Sure - that's where they belong. But INSIDE? Nope. Y'all don't pay rent!

shorty63136

Let this be a lesson to you, yuppy families with cutesy face-to-face computer setups!

Hiphopopotamus

@92BuickLeSabre:

I'm with ya man... I don't know if I'd be able to hold my lunch after opening up the lid and seeing that... geeze.

I'm gonna check my AIO when I get home from work now... oh god.

BurntToast

gives a whole new meaning to the expression 'debugging the printer'

yogibimbi

Welcome to Raul's Wild Kingdom!
This is my ant farm. These little guys can lift fifty times their own weight. They also spend weeks digging these little tunnels. And hey, they really hate it when you do this.

...Oh look. They're really mad now.

DeadWriter

@Bweetza: hehe

yogibimbi

-go outside
-seal the scanner area except for a straw as an opening.
-fire raid through opening
-watch them die
-if they begin to escape...burn them.

man, I should have been born 3000 years ago.

redkamel

@92BuickLeSabre: HAHAHA

+ Watch video

Joseph

Throw a mirror into the scanner bed. That should fry em'.

Joetimek

I'd be running the scanner....see if I could cook em....or at least move them to the one end of the AIO.

Joseph_Shaw_520

Who else just checked their scanner bed for ants?

Substance_D

@sdsviet: Nah. They'd probably get revved up like a deuce, another runner in the night.

Bweetza

i wonder what would happen if he'd turn the scanner and scan some stuff? would they be blinded by the light? hehe

sdsviet

buy a new printer, then take the old one out and set one ant on fire and watch what happens next

revolution-inc

Throw it away? NO.
He only has one option and on option only...flamethrower

noodles90

What would I do...what would I do? Oh, I know!

I'd vomit.

And then I'd vomit again.

And then from the sight of all those ants and my vomit, I'd fall onto the floor and start dry-heaving for about 15 minutes.

Then I'd start crying from the pain and beg, please, please for a glass of water. And then as I started to slowly catch my breath again, I'd slowly stand up, rubbing my head and wiping away the sweat with my sole clean shirt-cuff.

As I was almost upright, I'd reach for a paper towel to clean my face, and upon catching that scene out of the corner of my eye, I would lurch forward and the entire process would repeat itself indefinitely.

And after about 2-3 hours, I'm guessing I would likely be dead.

92BuickLeSabre

What! I was hoping that he was actually going to scan them.

Matthew Hughes

So THAT's what HP all-in-ones are good for. I knew there had to be something...

TurboFool

Made me itch just watching that video.

Obsidian

@Bweetza:

omg...so much win.

buyj3llo

all you really need is one big magnifying glass and a little sunshine...

when all else fails... think of what children would do... rotten little... oh... sorry...

lauwersp

SCAN SOMETHING!!! and make a video of that!!!

urbanturban666

It might be fun to try taking this in to the repair shop--even more so if you filmed the result. Kind of like the "Will it return?" video on Will it Blend.

Petezah

I'd recommend taking it outside, place it on a table and buy/use some Terro. It's a syrupy goop that ants gobble down and return to their nests, killing the whole nest in hours.

You may also do this on your desk to make sure you wipe out any other nests.

Then once dead, use a vacuum cleaner to suck up the mess or a gas station tire pump to blow them out.

FrankReality

I know what I would do...
Press 'Scan'!

marksman7328

I would so press SCAN and film them all being smashed into ant much. Then I would take it and burn it.

Quicksilver4648

This happened to me once. It turns out, my lamp was never turning off, and the ants seemed to like living in there with the lamp on. I took the thing apart, piece by piece, and cleaned every last ant out. I modified my settings so that the lamp wouldnt stay on unless I was using the scanner - and I never had that problem again.

chumitz

@TurboFool: yeah besides stumping dell owners when there pc takes 7 years to boot...

urbanturban666

Man, that's just nasty...

Though it does lead into the next piece of great technology art, thanks to Arthur Watley:

Ant Farm Keyboard!

Platypus Man

I'd get a powerful "LASER" and shoot them with it. Or get a magnifying glass.

Namster

+ Watch video

love that vid.
its not a rick roll, i promise.

makeseven

mmm mmmm mmm on the hurling note::

+ Watch video

Charging_Mooses

@DeadWriter: lol

And yes first thought would be to scan them.

Next thought:
I'm in plaid...I made this in High School a while ago...so destructive...

Office Space Remake 2

doobiebros2two

bring it to best buy, tell them you need it sent to service.

Hamspiced

Get them with some ANTI-FREEZE! Sorry.

nincompoop

@Bweetza: You sir, win the humorous quote of the day award.

Zencyde

@92BuickLeSabre:

+ Watch video

zero G Puke!!

Ariel_Wollinger

I had this problem once in a mickey and Donald Nintendo Game-watch!!! I had to disassemble the whole thing. It worked!!

Ariel_Wollinger

@shorty63136: lol

my solution is simple..

RAID.

dandaman247

I meant the last vid. sorry.

Ariel_Wollinger

+ Watch video

LOL!

Ariel_Wollinger

Nuke it from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.

Crazymonkey

@rasmusjp: ANT BORGS!

Ariel_Wollinger

the final solution

+ Watch video

Ariel_Wollinger

Doesn't anyone see what these ants are really doing? They're assimilating the scanner! Its technological distinctiveness will be added to their own. Resistance is futile.

rasmusjp

Happened to me too.
It sucks. Ants are so fucking annoying.
And here in the area i live everyone has ants at house.
more like ANTS have humans living around.

pulyx

@Hamspiced: Brilliant. I bet you'd get it back with twice as many ants and all the ink cartridges missing.

Zomg I hate ant hordes, ever since an infestation at my old house (in my clothes closet). One or two are okay, but a whole colonies worth? *shudder*

ionerox

@92BuickLeSabre: I love it!

hagrun

@TurboFool:

It's an all-in-one. Therefore, unless the manufacturers want to be sued for false advertising, they have to include ants, anteaters, spears for hunting said anteaters, grills, charcoal, lighter fluid, sauce, and a recipe book. They also have to include Life, the universe, and everything.

My recipe of choice would be sealing up all the cracks, inserting the hose of a CO@ fire extinguisher [a la Theodore Gray] and freezing four different kinds of honeydew outta those suckers. Then I'd dip them in chocolate and give them to some unsuspecting passerby.

42

kanon

Scan a can of raid.
Scan a picture of an anteater.
Scan a picture of a size 13 boot.
(just kidding)

I'd get a large plastic tub, take it outside, put the mopier inside it, and open up the lid (unscrew) and either fog the tub (covered up) or use a good ant spray.

Either way, those mopiers are cheap and I would just destroy it (chems in Ant spray might be reactive to the internals after time...I doubt it will be healthy).

SigmundTheSeaMonster

@bilups: Ok, AWFUL mind picture! AAAAAHHHH!! DO NOT WANT!

RE-L

If that's what his printer's like, imagine what his WALLS are like.

bilups

I would buy a can of foam spray insulation and fill up the printer cavity see what the ants do with that. lol

dsenier

Turn it into Best Buys recycling program.

some_stupid_nut

I wonder what HP support would do if he sent it in. Better yet, bring it to Geek Squad with a hidden video cam.

mwwilk

- Protect the Queen!
- Which one's the Queen?
- I'm the Queen.
- No you're not.

atomx

I'd go down to the local zoo and fee it to the Aardvark.

Noobs-R-Us

Not sure if anyone mentioned this but alot of ants are attracted to electrical currents, thats my guess why they are there. In the south west they crawl inside traffic lights and traffic controllers all sorts of gadgets with currents running trough them

DarwinCB

Just get an aerosol can and a match...

bobx3

I would probably move out of my apartment and leave the printer there.

pikafumanchu

wow i'm surprised this isn't more common. i've had a colony or two in my hp printer (hmm check out their factory :P) also and not just that; my usb soundcard had to be hosed down and my desk littered with dead ants. i put out those raid ant traps but they annexed that to build another community. somehow they cleared themselves up but ants do still come in through the kitchen electric outlets.

freddyg

toss it. printers are disposably cheap these days anyways. . .

moonphrogg

A friend of mine spilled a cherry-syrupy drink into his bass amp once. He unplugged it before it could short anything, but inside was a red, sticky mess. He set it outside in his shed, and of course, ants came. He was going to kill them, except hat he noticed that half of the mess was gone. When he checked it the next day, the ants had moved on, and his amp was clean and working perfectly.

macserv

Speaking of ants i love this video

+ Watch video

Thanatos

Name each and every one of the ants. Build relationships with them. Then take the unit into geek squad to get fixed. When your new friends all wind up dead, sue the pants off of geek squad for mental suffering.

"There was no warning in the service agreement that Geek Squad might kill my beloved pets! I think of them more like family now, and I don't know how I will ever go on. What's that? $500,000 settlement you say? what were we talking about again?"

tek_nic

heh... talk about a computer bug.

My dad just takes white syrup, puts it in an upside down cd container, and leaves it at the side of our driveway, right near the pavement.

Within a week, there are so many ants and bugs stuck in there, you can't tell what it is anymore.

fierfek99

Yeah, running the scanner outside sounds far too tempting to do before simply chucking it. I mean, if you're _already_ going to throw it out, it's not like it'll hurt anything to do it once or several dozen times. Either that or start permanently displaying your new do-it-yourself ant farm next to the aquarium you made out of your old Apple computer.

Anyways, we had something sorta similar to this happen at my last job. We had a large laser printer that started printing a couple blotches of ink, always the same shape, but they'd move up and down the pages. The tech guy they brought in to fix it informed us that a mouse had gotten inside, peed on the print roller, and that the acid content in its pee had actually etched the surface of the roller.

@NightElfMohawk:
I know a guy in Michigan who had ants chew up the electronics in a toy that he was storing in a free-standing shed.

Purple Dave

@yogibimbi: Well, actually, it gives the original meaning to 'debugging'. ;-)

Printers/scanners are so cheap these days that I'd trash it without thinking twice. No sense keeping something infested like that around.

MegaZone

@Matthew Hughes: I am pretty disappointed right now. :(

tex1ntux

@DeadWriter:

Ok, quoting Pi doesn't make it funny. Even if there were ants in the movie.

moviscop

@noodles90: I'm with this guy!
So here is what I would do.. (Just like cops, if you make em work to catch you, your going to get a beating)

For those little fucking ants that were damaging my high tech piece of equipment... making me take it apart to get to them... OH! they would of so have it coming to them once I got em out.. into a metal container so they couldn't run all over the place.

Then I would roast there ass..

-Core-

"What would I do?" is a hypothetical question because I wouldn't own HP products as a matter of principle. Call HP tech support, maybe they will invoke the DMCA to have the ants banned just like they did for 3rd party ink cartridges because only HP is allowed to create bugs in HP products.

WB

I'd sneak it into Best Buy and leave on a shelf.

And then sit back and wait for the headlines to make the news. bwahahaha!

PigVenus