Software
Jesus Tries to Save Your Soul But Windows Stops Him
Posted by Jesus Diaz at 10:50 AM on August 29, 2008
And I heard, as it were, the noise of thunder: One of the four beasts saying: "Come and see." And I saw. And behold, there was the other Jesus, the Bible character, calling me from a big screen saying "Jesus is the Reason for The--V-Sign this program-and will be shu-whaaa?" Clearly, Jesus is good with all this saving Humanity and making water into wine tricks, but I'm afraid he's no match for Windows errors. [Fail]

Comments (AU Comments · US Comments)
Alikka
Posted August 30, 2008 3:39 PM
Love it.
Hahaha.
Paradise
Posted 11:25 AM 29/8/08
@robpruitt: seeing as her comment was insulting and on top of it not funny and your comment was just plain hateful I think he has ever reason to be upset.
@Nintenboy01: i can't wait to ask you the same question (except with your faith or lack thereof) someday.
Paradise
Crash Override 777
Posted 11:23 AM 29/8/08
I think you guys like saying Muslim a lot just for the sake of it, I'm considered a liberal to my people so I quite frankly don't give a flying fuck on what you think I'm you just like bringing up Muslims since you think its a fun thing to do and I don't like it very much.
Crash Override 777
Junginator
Posted 11:23 AM 29/8/08
You mean Jesus isn't imaginary? Hmm...
Junginator
homerjay
Posted 11:19 AM 29/8/08
@Crash Override 777: So umm... What part of either of your statements illustrates the peace-loving nature of the Muslim religion?
homerjay
Crash Override 777
Posted 11:19 AM 29/8/08
@Nintenboy01: Judge people on who they are not their religion, so quit trying to pile people into one group.
Crash Override 777
Nintenboy01
Posted 11:11 AM 29/8/08
@Crash Override 777: You just insulted a pretty lady. Is this how Muslims treat other strangers?
Nintenboy01
Nykwil
Posted 11:11 AM 29/8/08
Clearly Jesus was a mac guy
Nykwil
Crash Override 777
Posted 11:10 AM 29/8/08
STFU
Crash Override 777
robpruitt
Posted 11:08 AM 29/8/08
@Crash Override 777: OMG A muslim overreacting? I never thought I'd see the day.
robpruitt
Crash Override 777
Posted 11:06 AM 29/8/08
@CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR: I'm Muslim you asshole and you capitalize it Muslim don't be a fuck wad.
Crash Override 777
MagnoliaBoy
Posted 11:03 AM 29/8/08
What would BSOD Jesus do?
MagnoliaBoy
MagnoliaBoy
Posted 11:02 AM 29/8/08
It's an Omen! Behold!
MagnoliaBoy
hammertime1994
Posted 11:01 AM 29/8/08
@BiZarRroBALlmeR: God?
hammertime1994
Griffehpoo
Posted 11:00 AM 29/8/08
He helps those who help thems-V-Sign this program-and will be shu.
On a side note, I don't think there's any internet meme more ubiquitous and annoying than the word "fail" in all caps. Personally, I think it beats out the faux-inspirational posters in terms of sheer annoyance. At least those are occasionally clever.
Griffehpoo
robpruitt
Posted 10:59 AM 29/8/08
Also.. Screw you mac guys.
Amen
robpruitt
robpruitt
Posted 10:59 AM 29/8/08
Judging from the look of that error button that was Windows 2000. Judging from the look of the building, it was last cleaned when Windows 2000 was current.
robpruitt
albokay
Posted 10:58 AM 29/8/08
Pray the rosary to end windows errors.
albokay
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Posted 10:56 AM 29/8/08
You know that muslim in the middle thought this was Microsoft coming over to the Allah side.
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Vivara
Posted 10:56 AM 29/8/08
...and wept, until the sky er...the screen turned blue. He started weeping again.
Vivara
BiZarRroBALlmeR
Posted 10:55 AM 29/8/08
raising the dead? no problem. heal the sick? Done. Blue screen of death? son of a.....
BiZarRroBALlmeR
takashimiike Ultimate
Posted 10:55 AM 29/8/08
Cheer up Jesus, we're not worth saving anyway.
takashimiike Ultimate
scarbrtj
Posted 10:52 AM 29/8/08
Jesus wept.
scarbrtj
robpruitt
Posted 11:50 AM 29/8/08
@Paradise: I just took a gander at all the comments you have made and want to congratulate you on your recent post above. This seems to be the first comment you have made not addressing other posters spelling or wondering why other posters haven't been banned.
I can see now that you put as much effort into being Politically correct as Grammatically correct. GG
robpruitt
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Posted 11:50 AM 29/8/08
You all should stfu. You guys can make fun of christianity and blah blah but I say ONE thing about a MUSLIM and you go nuts? Yeah don't be hyprocites. STFU.
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
DustyButt
Posted 11:46 AM 29/8/08
Hope they didn't lose any data!
BWA! Of course they didn't, because Jesus saves!
DustyButt
godwhacker
Posted 11:43 AM 29/8/08
in my dealings with people, i find it useful to hold all to one test. do they act like asshats? if so, i limit my contact with them. if not, i am cool with them, unless they prove me wrong.
and i am secure enough with myself that one remark,(even if ill-advised) does not mean i have to freak.
i'm just sayin.......
godwhacker
roflwaffles
Posted 11:35 AM 29/8/08
@Crash Override 777:
lol internet.
roflwaffles
Weihovah
Posted 11:33 AM 29/8/08
bill gates = antichrist?
Weihovah
Crash Override 777
Posted 11:32 AM 29/8/08
*you
Crash Override 777
Crash Override 777
Posted 11:29 AM 29/8/08
@Paradise: I'm grateful that look at someone beyond their faith and see them as a person and not a poster child of their religion.
Crash Override 777
Paradise
Posted 11:27 AM 29/8/08
@homerjay: ditto for you as well.
Paradise
mowog74
Posted 12:10 PM 29/8/08
It's not a Windows error, it's a V-Sign (whatever that is) error.
mowog74
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Posted 12:01 PM 29/8/08
Yeah so whoever banned me, NOT COOL. I can see that there is someone on this page that doesn't have a problem banning someone who wasn't TRYING to insult any muslim, but they don't ban the people who insult christianity.
There isn't a religious war going on here, whoever TRIED to ban me, you should be ashamed of how stupid you are :)
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Some_F-in-ShiT_Ass
Posted 11:58 AM 29/8/08
Jules Winnfield: Ezekiel 25:17. 'The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyrannies of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepards the weak through the valley of darkness. For he is truly his brothers' keeper and finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the lord when I lay my vengeance upon you. Blam, Blam, Blam Blam, Blam Blam Blam!
FTW
Some_F-in-ShiT_Ass
Some_F-in-ShiT_Ass
Posted 11:56 AM 29/8/08
@robpruitt:
LOL, BUT, I'm a Mac Guy so Burn in Hell!!!! ;-) J/K
Some_F-in-ShiT_Ass
godwhacker
Posted 11:54 AM 29/8/08
@DustyButt:
ha!!!
but does he restore?
godwhacker
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Posted 12:32 PM 29/8/08
@robpruitt: Thank you, I'm glad there are people here that understand that it's not about respecting someone who didn't show you respect in the first place.
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Posted 12:31 PM 29/8/08
@Crash Override 777: UH i'm not trying to show respect to you. You called me a fuck wad for saying something harmless. I have Muslim friends who I respect, not you. Maybe you shouldn't go freaking out on people for harmless comments. I also didn't capitalize christianity, maybe that should show you that I'm not trying to show respect on here like you're my elder or something. GET OVER IT.
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
cowpop
Posted 12:29 PM 29/8/08
Don't you know? APPLES ARE EVIL. God forbids them.
cowpop
Hyman Decent
Posted 12:29 PM 29/8/08
Hyman Decent
robpruitt
Posted 12:29 PM 29/8/08
@Crash Override 777: When are you ..guys going to learn that you gather more with Honey than an AK47? You insulted her and want her to bend to your will? Read Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" man.
robpruitt
Crash Override 777
Posted 12:24 PM 29/8/08
@CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR: Yet you insist on typing Muslim in lowercase cause you clearly don't have anything against us, I find it offensive that people do the same with typing Christian since you are using that why of typing objectively its like me typing someone's name like bob and steve or even typing god you use a uppercase maybe thats just me.
Crash Override 777
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Posted 12:19 PM 29/8/08
@takashimiike Ultimate: Well sorry I don't take to bullshit well. I think silencing someone when they haven't done anything is also a sign of ignorance.
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
takashimiike Ultimate
Posted 12:17 PM 29/8/08
@CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR: Don't be a meanie.
takashimiike Ultimate
Crash Override 777
Posted 1:04 PM 29/8/08
That last part I wasn't talking to Hyman Decent.
Crash Override 777
Crash Override 777
Posted 1:03 PM 29/8/08
@CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR: Well I don't feel like fighting over this cause nothing is gonna get accomplished so I say we call a truce if your willing to. At least you didn't go over board and post this. @Hyman Decent: Soo your cool in my book even tho I know you probably don't give two shits otherwise.
Crash Override 777
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Posted 1:02 PM 29/8/08
@andyo: Thank you! THANK YOU THANK YOU.
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
SneakerFiend
Posted 12:59 PM 29/8/08
LMFAO! Its amazing how all of the photos of the system errors are caught. If i would've saw that i would've taken a picture i wont lie. Hilarious.
SneakerFiend
andyo
Posted 12:54 PM 29/8/08
When people start getting upset and (worse) self-righteous because someone didn't capitalize some fucking word, and others defend that, we are in bad shape. christians, muslims, chill out. If you wanna get offended, what about your religions treating you as blind stupid followers? Now that's an ACTUAL reason to get offended.
And Crash Override 777, you say don't put people into the same group, but that's exactly what organized religion does. They're all mutually exclusive, and put TOTALLY ARBITRARY differences and barriers between peoples in order to tribalize them. Take christians (like I was) being proud of being called "sheep".
andyo
Human Bomb
Posted 12:46 PM 29/8/08
@CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR: That is the point right? "Who is my neighbor?"
Human Bomb
JuiceDaddy
Posted 1:27 PM 29/8/08
who?
JuiceDaddy
andyo
Posted 1:27 PM 29/8/08
@robpruitt: Nope, never said I was enlightened, but then again maybe I am a little more now than when I was religious (though I never was terribly so, I was a lame catholic).
Thing is I don't pretend to know stuff about the world that doesn't even make sense, if I don't know something I just say so.
And you thoroughly misunderstood my "sheep" comment, but that's probably more my fault, I didn't make it clear, I added the previous sentence just before posting. I'm saying anyone being proud of being called a sheep has had some squeaky-clean brainwashing there. I was a christian, but I was never too into being called a sheep. Probably what took me out of it too.
AND, I'm the last person that you'll see taking ALL sides. I am very against statemets of truth by faith. The religious would call me a staunch atheist, but I don't call myself that, in exactly the same way unicornists would call me an a-unicornist, but I don't, and fairyists would call me an a-fairyist, but I don-t. I am TOTALLY against faith as a form of knowledge being called a VIRTUE. It is a freaking intellectual weakness. That's my side. I like reality because I live in it.
And forgot to mention to Jesus (the Gizmodo character) "th other Jesus, the Bible character", that was great.
andyo
Crash Override 777
Posted 1:25 PM 29/8/08
@Crash Override 777: lol Also your a fellow stoner soo I can't really be pissed at you, I haven't been smoking in awhile so I'm getting antsy if you know what I mean.
Crash Override 777
Crash Override 777
Posted 1:22 PM 29/8/08
@CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR: I thought you were being racists and now realize that your not, so I apologize for the comments I made before that were directed towards you.
Crash Override 777
Junginator
Posted 1:20 PM 29/8/08
Religion is for the feeble-minded. Cavemen believed in such things, but there is no reason for modern people to do so. Where is your god? *patiently waits*
Anywho...back on topic: Windows got an error? Seriously?
Junginator
Bokusatsu_Tenshi
Posted 1:19 PM 29/8/08
Yes, Jesus is the reason for the Windows bugs.
Bokusatsu_Tenshi
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Posted 1:17 PM 29/8/08
@Crash Override 777: When you don't call me a fuck wad for no reason, sure no problem about being cool. I won't hold grudges. Remember, everyone is entitled to their own opinions and views despite how much it offends you.
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Weihovah
Posted 1:17 PM 29/8/08
what's wrong w/ all you people? this is a tech blog. can we stick to the windows vs osx debates?
Weihovah
rimshot515
Posted 1:08 PM 29/8/08
Atheism ftw!
rimshot515
robpruitt
Posted 1:06 PM 29/8/08
@andyo: So now all organized religion is bad and you are the enlightened one? I say your a coward trying to take no side and be all things to all people. No wonder your proud of being called a sheep.
It is sad how there is so much anger in this topic that one little un-capitalized word can start so much crap. All this saber rattling for what?
robpruitt
Crash Override 777
Posted 1:55 PM 29/8/08
i guess i learn new stuff everyday
Crash Override 777
scarbrtj
Posted 1:47 PM 29/8/08
@Crash Override 777:
not an ee cummings fan, i see...
scarbrtj
HellTempest
Posted 2:07 PM 29/8/08
Wtf, it seems it's that time of the month for EVERYBODY, jesus, stop fucking arguing like a bunch of ten years olds and take the penis out of your ass.
HellTempest
godwhacker
Posted 2:07 PM 29/8/08
@scarbrtj:
ha!!!!!!
you win +5!!!!!
godwhacker
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Posted 1:58 PM 29/8/08
@Crash Override 777: Fellow stoners unite![www.flickr.com]
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Posted 3:24 PM 29/8/08
@HellTempest: Why don't you stfu. People are allowed to talk about what they please. Plus no one is fighting anymore. People apologized and people calmed down. psycho.
CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR
Mith
Posted 3:55 PM 29/8/08
right.. well.. the ERROR, which happens to be the main topic of discussion is HILARIOUS!!! Oh my.. Windows 2000 just SUCKED waay back when didn't it!?
Jesus trying to deliver an all important message but is totally SCHOOLED by "V-ERROR"... good going Microsoft.. way to show Jesus who's boss!!!
.. not there this is ANYTHING WRONG with Jesus or anything.. like hes all totally cool right? Jesus is my homeboy.. or so they say
Allah is too! Wouldn't wanna leave him out.. or anything..
Neither is Krishna, or Confucius, or Steve Jobbs!
Just covering all my bases here folks.. wouldn't wanna offend anyone.
Mith
doobiebros2two
Posted 3:45 PM 29/8/08
Perhaps, Jesus [thats Diaz], the sign was in fact trying to tell YOU something, not tell you about the almighty Jesus. Geez...get some perspective here...
doobiebros2two
Crash Override 777
Posted 4:16 PM 29/8/08
Steve Jobs is holy and Apple is my savior. :D
Crash Override 777
codemagic
Posted 4:41 PM 29/8/08
Can there be any doubt now that Bill Gates is the anti-christ? Here we see him deliberately intervening in God's divine message.
Or maybe it's his cousin Jebus again. That Jebus is a real wiseacre!
codemagic
Crash Override 777
Posted 4:51 PM 29/8/08
lol jebus is the funniest thing next to rock me sexy jesus.
Crash Override 777
GadgetPlay
Posted 5:49 PM 29/8/08
@Griffehpoo: "any internet meme more ubiquitous and annoying than the word "fail" in all caps."
It is incredibly annoying. Is that game speak, or just idiocy?
@Crash Override 777: "so quit trying to pile people into one group."
It would seem that you piled yourself into that group.
@homerjay: "the peace-loving nature of the Muslim religion?"
Huh? It had to be something between the stonings and the beheadings, but I blinked and missed it.
@CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR: Gd grl.
@Crash Override 777: "its like me typing someone's name like bob and steve or even typing god you use a uppercase maybe thats just me."
Wow, no, we never type in all lower case here on the internetubes!
@Hyman Decent: Hard to disemvowel a pic!
@SneakerFiend: "Its amazing how all of the photos of the system errors are caught."
What's that have to do with this obviously muslim vs. christian post?
@Weihovah: "can we stick to the windows vs osx debates?"
Apparently not.
@Junginator: "Religion is for the feeble-minded."
So you're a Methodist?
@Mith: "Just covering all my bases here folks.. wouldn't wanna offend anyone."
You left out the most important, the most omnipotent, the most omnicient of all...THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER! (His noodley, al dente appendendges be praised!)
GadgetPlay
jimbut
Posted 9:14 PM 29/8/08
pwned
jimbut
ddtx2
Posted 10:14 PM 29/8/08
The application was the one who have the failure, not Windows, this is not a Blue screen.
ddtx2
mricyfire
Posted 10:37 PM 29/8/08
I dont think any of these are real...it just so happens that antime a movie is being played it just so happens to crash and Giz is always there to take a picture...
My windows since 95, 98,2000, ME, Xp and Vista..yes I have had all have NEVER crashed playing a video or a powerpoint.
mricyfire
Curves
Posted 10:17 PM 29/8/08
I used to wonder how wars start, then I read Giz and it all became crystal clear.....
Curves
HJTravels
Posted 10:40 PM 29/8/08
@scarbrtj: Ding Ding Ding Ding Ding Ding DING, BONUS
HJTravels
BigViper
Posted 11:06 PM 29/8/08
@CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR: he he he who wants to play muslim in the middle :)
BigViper
stradric
Posted 11:50 PM 29/8/08
Don't blame Windows. That's a program error.
stradric
Curves
Posted 11:36 PM 29/8/08
I searched and searched this picture looking for a some violent looking Muslim and then I finally see some poor woman in a scarf, minding her own business, pushing a baby carriage. THATS what this is about? Some poor mother not bothering anyone? Geez, way to over-react people.
Live and let live. Its called Peace.
Curves
s8ist
Posted 12:11 AM 30/8/08
Don't blame the program. Blame the Jesus.
It's obvious. Jesus is the reason for the V-Sign.
s8ist
shenanigans
Posted 12:43 AM 30/8/08
@CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR: Mad props for you standing your ground Carmen.
shenanigans
shenanigans
Posted 12:42 AM 30/8/08
Nice one Jesus. CarmenLovesHerNewCanonDSLR makes a point how anybody can make fun of Christianity, but when it comes to Muslims, be careful, it's eggshells for everybody. Your disemvoweling her just showed everybody where you stand. HAHA.
shenanigans
ps61318
Posted 12:37 AM 30/8/08
I just wanted to tell you all, good luck, we're all counting on you.
HEEEEEEEEEEEEEhehehehehehehehehehe.
This is why I read Gizmodo, boys and girls. Just as when Yogi and BooBoo found the picnic basket full of black bean dip and hot pepper salsa, it bears repeating (get it, "bears repeating"?): I read the comments for much the same reason as people watch NASCAR, for the crashes and things bursting into flame.
Great stuff. Kind of a bummer that Carmen and Crash Override have started singing Kumbaya. Thank G-d that the Atheists are here to keep things humming.
ps61318
Jesus Diaz
Posted 1:00 AM 30/8/08
@shenanigans: I did because I'm tired of her shouting and bitching. That and I wanted to try it for the first time. But not because of my religious views.
Jesus Diaz
mildretard
Posted 2:21 AM 30/8/08
"My God says you're a dickhead."
"My God says YOU'RE a dickhead"
For once I'm going to agree with God on this one.
mildretard
banmojo
Posted 2:08 AM 30/8/08
I really wish you'd stop referring to yourself in the 3rd person, Jesus!
Geezus!!
hahaha
banmojo
Chromeo
Posted 3:00 AM 30/8/08
Wow...this thread derailed quiiiiite nicely, I would say.
We have atheists insulting everyone who believes in a religion.
We have Muslims fighting Christians.
But we have obviously overlooked one major minority here (would that count as an oxymoron?).
We have overlooked the CLEARLY offended Brunette in the Billabong sweater...just LOOK at the anguish on her face! She's obviously quite upset that Jesus has been silenced by programming Atheists AGAIN!
Chromeo
Con Seannery
Posted 3:58 AM 30/8/08
Man, someone is gonna get CRUCIFIED over this, I would HATE to be in that office...
Con Seannery
venomous_duck41
Posted 4:25 AM 30/8/08
LETS ALL GET OFFENDED BECAUSE OF CAPITALS. im not yelling, really
damn you microsoft errors look at what you started!
venomous_duck41
marc_wtih_a_c
Posted 8:55 AM 30/8/08
I do remember seeing this happen at a rave when it turned midnight on new years.. ah good old windows pop ups, ruining my porn and cool displays everywhere!!
and BTW...If the zombies need a starting point for brain eating they should start with some names on this thread...
marc_wtih_a_c
DJTripleRRR
Posted 9:18 AM 30/8/08
Hmm so windows is tied with the Devils evil plans...
DJTripleRRR
robpruitt
Posted 10:54 AM 30/8/08
@Curves: Please feel to read threads before your soap box lectures in the future. kthx
robpruitt
heylookitscook
Posted 3:19 PM 30/8/08
That made me rofl so bad.
heylookitscook
shawnmos
Posted 4:11 PM 1/9/08
People still use Windows 98???
shawnmos
mattj99
Posted 11:34 PM 29/8/08
That sign is like that all the time.
It's in Cardiff, Wales on the main shopping street. The photo must be a couple of years old because the store behind is now a mobile phone store. But it had the exactly same v-sign message on it this morning - I think they must employ some spotty 16 year old whose sole job is to reboot it 3 times daily.
mattj99
dontstoprestart
Posted 12:43 PM 29/8/08
Jesus causes errors
dontstoprestart
HeL0
Posted 8:16 AM 30/8/08
@venomous_duck41:
Quite honestly, I'm offended that no one is capitalizing "stoner". It should be Stoner, dammit. It is, after all, my religion. :-P
HeL0