They should just put 3d money all over the ground, even if they know its fake, people in philly will try and spend it

HawkSkater0

y'know, when things suddenly pop up in front of me, I either hit my brakes (if I have no where to go) or I swerve to avoid them. After my accident is over with, I would feel stupid that I tried to avoid a totally fictional road obstruction.

This doesn't seem like the brightest idea in the world to be honest. Sounds like a waste of money.

-Core-

"While I can see this plan working initially, what happens when the locals grow accustomed to the decals? If they know the bumps are fake, what is to prevent them from speeding? It just doesn't seem logical in the long term."

But then it gives the local government there an oppurtunity to do what all governments are excellent at; wasting gobs and gobs of YOUR MONEY on something absolutely STUPID.

sdgmcdon

@92BuickLeSabre:
Nice.

The Sword Master

@HawkSkater0:

Best idea yet! : )

That actually reminds me of something in that same vein that was actually tried. The British (who came up with angled decks, steam catapults and fresnel lens landing systems for aircraft carriers), tried an experiment to reduce aircraft weight. They built an inflatable rubber flight deck and removed (or maybe just didn't extend) the landing gear to see how it all worked. The landings were so violent that the pilot's helmet had to be latched to the ejection seat headrest to prevent whiplash.

MyPetFly

If I saw those arrow-shaped objects in front of me, my first thought would be to brace myself for some wild and crazy speed boost action -- ala RC Pro-AM.

mpjohnst

They should make real speed bumps and put 3d roads over them, that way there will be no cars left to speed with.

HawkSkater0

It'll be fun to see what pedestrians do when they first see them.

@HawkSkater0:

Or 3D trenches...

MyPetFly

@Raven77: I'm sure it'll only take the first car to pass over them for everyone else behind them to realize that they aren't really speed bumps.

I'm with EdgarCatilina about putting real speed bumps in after about a week... really piss of those drivers that think they know it all, haha.

ttech10

They should make fake 3d walls, that would be interesting

HawkSkater0

When everyone gets used to it they won't slow down for soccer balls and little kids anymore.

sxr7171

It sounds more like it'll cause more accidents than slowing drivers down.

outie

I can see some lil ol lady stopping traffic because she's scared to go over that shit.

At best it will only undermine real speed bumps and people will begin to ignore those.

FritzLaurel

In other news, gold- and silver- plated speed bumps sharp enough to puncture tyres and slice your chassis in two are being installed at other carefully chosen locations around philadelphia . . .

tarzan69

@jiveabillion: You mean that fake 3d car we put in the parking spot? Visitors think the spots are empty, so they park further away, leaving all the good spaces for the locals.

No, if you wanted to slow down traffic, just park an ambulance and some dummies in various positions like there's been an accident... rubbernecking is hard to overcome.

morcheeba

"Drive CarePhilly"??? How about you just change the city's name to Loserdelphia?

bobdobbs' MBA misses LindsayJoy's MBP

@jiveabillion: HAHAHaH that made my day, sir.

Vonn64

So what is this going to cost tax payers? Cause if it's really that important, I dunno, maybe you could,... put in REAL speed bumps?

MagnoliaBoy

If they were going to put fake objects in the middle of the road to make people slow down, why wouldn't they draw in actual speed bumps instead of these strangely colored angular deals?

homerjay

Wait til they get my 3D lawsuit when I swerve into a parked car when I try to miss those.

jiveabillion

Will there be arrows that make you go faster if you drive over them?

GeekyNerdGuy

Well if I saw bumps like those in the road, I would turn around the other way. They look like they'd seriously eff some stuff up.

skittlzncombos

uhm, or the senior citizens swerve into oncoming traffic to avoid them. IDIOTS!

Face_523

I would bet there is A LOT of traffic in philly. 50 outsiders for every local every hour will surely slow down traffic!
:)

Raven77

it's a decoy to catch all the stoners & drunks that actually react to those things.

losermike

I feel sorry for the poor old lady that slams on her brakes in fright, and everyone behind her slams into the back of her car.

Yea, really smart there guys. (Dumbasses!)

spectator101

After people get used to seeing these thins, the obvious next step is for some concerned citizen to replace the decals with actual bumps.

EdgarCatilina

But still likely to be more successful than the sister program in Leslie, Michigan.

92BuickLeSabre

The obvious solution is to team these with real, portable speedbumps. Once every couple of days, the road crews go out and switch these things up. You'll never know if they're real or not until you roll over them.

Wireless Joe

@ Sean Fallon:
"While I can see this plan working initially, what happens when the locals grow accustomed to the decals? If they know the bumps are fake, what is to prevent them from speeding? It just doesn't seem logical in the long term."

are you kidding? that's when they put real speedbumps in their place. That's when it REALLY gets good

discounteggroll

They should make a 3d decal on the road that says TURN AROUND when you come up to the city limits. Thats what will really save lives.

albokay

I hope the city's prepared for an increase in fender benders, which seem much more dangerous than someone driving 5 over the speed limit.

UniComp

Oh wait, already said...

um... What about huge monsters? Like Hulk? Hulk Smash speeding cars!

Jasontrainer

@morcheeba: Duuuude great idea!

Why not 3D pictures of kids playing in the street?

Jasontrainer

@sxr7171:

When everyone gets used to it they won't slow down for soccer balls and little kids anymore.

Yep. Training people to ignore obstacles in the road isn't exactly the brightest idea I've seen.

geoelectric

Being a Philly native, I just figured that some of these potholes won't get fixed very quickly due to officials wanting us to drive slower.

Would be redundantly pointless to even consider making these things on one of the bumpier streets like say... Germantown Ave which is a street covered with bricks for several miles.

DaSmoothNerd

let them speed up for sometime with the fake ones, them change for real ones!
don't forget the camera at the spots!

AndersonBMX

@Jasontrainer:
It should be a happy family having lunch on a picinic blanket.

mcknn

If they know the bumps are fake, what is to prevent them from speeding?

The potholes?

twoeightnine

Didnt work here either - fast forward to 2:14 and again at 3:33

+ Watch video

Wile E. Coyote - SUPER GENIUS!

Snorbalp

Let just remove all the roads, problem solved, this way we dont have to install speed bumps, there wont be any roads to install them on. We can save 10's of millions (microsoft xbox joke). Pilly should pay me for my great ideas...

HawkSkater0

How about we just install a 3D pungee pit? With spikes and death in wait for those who dare speed or say drive over them, there's no way anyone would do five over.

dave_1138

I had a friend killed last week as she crossed a road. The driver hit her and all he could say was he didn't notice her. If drivers ignore 2d signs and real 3d objects, what evidence shows that a 3d painting is going to slow people down.

DeadWriter

I bet stoners always go on blunt rides over those cause im a stoner (not to brag) and I would definetly do that all the time. This is kind of a stupid comment but whatever. Im baked now. Oh yea listen to the FLEET FOXES trust me im not even kidding they are soooooooo good. seriously

SmokeDemKBizzles

Ah Philly, you make it too easy sometimes...

karmaghost

When I design my next bathroom, I'm gonna include something like this into the floor in front of the toilet, but it's going to look like a pit.

Git Em SteveDave wants to go Tranny watching w/Lindsay

Philly reprezentin'! Seriously we'll fall for anything, as long as a cheesesteak is involved.

P3nnst8r

They just have to randomly replace some bumps into real ones every now and then for people to slow down at all of them.

ToyHammer

I don't imagine these will be a problem for me, as I generally stick to the wrong side of the road, or sidewalks.

mhlaxp

@Snorbalp:

Ah, that sh*t never gets old.. good times.

PlasmaMachine

South Philly won't even blink at this shit.

tamoko

Next step, fake children in the road....now slow yourself

doobiebros22

@92BuickLeSabre: Wow, that went right over everyone's heads. Well done.

schwnj

@Snorbalp: aw man i love you in the most heterosexual way for reminding me of how amazing REAL cartoons are
now I must go and watch as much Tom n Jerry and Roadrunner as I can find out there

THANK YOU

ThisIsSharksTerriroty

I see a few potential problems with this: Either people overreact and cause accidents after they jam on their brakes (or they just completely stop traffic all together), or one day someone will actually put similarly colored blocks there and the people who are used to the things will crash...

Blah8

@92BuickLeSabre: You, sir, are a star. That took me a while to understand, but it was a classy one. All the way :)

jigsawfallingintoplace

Do what NY is doing - up the fines and allow more than just police officers to issue citations.

Bloomberg just announced that he will introduce a bill in Albany to allow other members of the NYPD to be able to issue citations - only traffic officers and full NYPD officers can do that now.

The Incredible OMG! Ponies!

@The Incredible OMG! Ponies!: Thank god there is Jimmy Justice to show up those "officers".

+ Watch video

Git Em SteveDave wants to go Tranny watching w/Lindsay

ACME's had these in their catalog for years.

gadgetplay

I can tell you from personal experience with these optical bumps here in Phoenix that they actually do work. Every time I drive down that street I slow for them and I drive it 4 days a week. For me they seem to do a better job than the real bumps. Real bumps i usually drive over much to quickly but these bumps always get me to slow down.

pozdvl

And they are going to keep up the paint job too? When most districts cannot even keep the yellow lines visible.

Theophilus P. Wildebeeste

These look like they were made to rip out your oil pan. (If they weren't decals that is)

Trevorblanco

@twoeightnine: You've hit on the solution - 3D potholes... just like those cheesy bullet hole decals for your car...

Fall-Apart

in other news, 8-bit isometric characters are being repeatedly being run over, with drivers carrying on without a second glance

mr_bigglesworth

@The Incredible OMG! Ponies!: Corollary: I told my "friend" it is illegal, but comforted him by saying that the guy would have to prove that he was being more than just careless and that as far as getting sued is concerned, the guy has to find him first. This could be difficult as the guy was too busy with scooping up his laptop off the floor to see who knocked it down.

Funny thing, those crowded rush hour trains.

The Incredible OMG! Ponies!

@Git Em SteveDave wants to go Tranny watching w/Lindsay: Looks like our fair city has no shortage of douchebags in desperate need of rabbit-punches.

On another law enforcement front, I have another ethical question regarding my "friend":

Let's say some asshole is taking up two seats on the subway during the evening rush hour so he can do "work" on his 17" MacBook Pro. Is it morally wrong to be just a little careless with one's backpack, thereby knocking the MBP onto the ground, breaking the screen and the hinge?

The Incredible OMG! Ponies!

Just slap some fake titties on the decals, and you've got a legitimate reason for motorists to slow down.

TeraFlopper

@Kaiser-Machead's got LindsayJoy's cookies on the SuperDrive: Here in Michigan the salt EATS the damn road during the winter...you think that possibly ever 5 years or so we could fix most of the bigger pot holes...no we have some pot holes that are about a foot wide in diameter. I hate when local governments use tax dollars for stupid shit like this.

Carmen HATES shit talkers :)

Talk about a desperate attempt to avoid paying for the extra tar to make a real speed bump?

Kaiser-Machead's got LindsayJoy's cookies on the SuperDrive

They've been using similar bumps in The Netherlands for decades now. Effective when you first encounter but once you know where they are, you drive over them without thinking twice. The irritating thing is that they do look flat from for and you think somebody painted something on the road but once you get closer the 3D profile becomes apparent and you slam the breaks thinking there's a bump in the road when there isn't.

saykoshey

It may create more problems than the intended result... people may start banging onto actual bumps thinking that it's fake!!

saiko

We've had these in a spot in my town for 2 years now, and since the day they were implemented i wondered "Why did they paint yellow white and blue angular shapes on the street?" Now i finally know they are used to attempt speed control... laughable to any idiots who slowed down, i didn't as much as know what those things were until now! haha

I'm from Squamish B.C. (1 hour north of Vancouver, 1 hour South of Whistler.)

ikick9000

now that's a waste of taxpayer dollars.

and how will this take care of the real problems in philadelphia of armed robberies and drive-by shootings?

rb4dv

This is either the most brilliant undertaking in our city's distinguished history, or the most embarrassing.

I'm not sure which.

I wish they'd push this money towards a solution to the incredible traffic congestion we have on the main throughways. But fancy illusions are also nice...I guess.

Kanyamagufa

@Kanyamagufa: Intelligent traffic routing billboards would be alright, but sorry, they can't even synchronize traffic lights.

It's so mind bending to imagine that traveling a few blocks could take half an hour, and then all of a sudden everyone get to go 30+.

skulldriveshaft

@rb4dv: well considering that armed robberies and drive-by shootings will be more common now because of these things.

armed robberies will increase because people will be slowing down, or stopping, for nothing, making car jacking easier.

"drive-by shootings" will increase because, well actually, the driver gets shot because someone thought they were gonna be a victim of a drive-by and acted in self defense.

skulldriveshaft

" It just doesn't seem logical in the long term. "

Welcome to civic planning in Philadelphia. Sigh...

Spero

they should put a fake 3d guy laying in the road bleeding- that would be way more awesome- or how about a fake 3d dead skunk

entropyman

@doobiebros22: Hahah

Pyao lyang shen

I would get a backhoe and scrap those bumps off the road!

pj737

How about 3D frogs? Oh wait...

Xenobiologista

@ToyHammer - I was thinking exactly the same thing. Have 1 out of 4 randomly be real and painted just like the fake ones. That'll save the city money while still making drivers go, I better slow down, I don't know if it's real or not.

Nyle

What type of horrible idea is this?!?!

people will eventually get used to it unless they move them around to other intersections ever so often.

Unless they look this weird you'll be able to identify them

If they look like a real speed bump then some people will drive over REAL bumps at 50mph's, you know that's going to be an expensive visit to the mechanic

the next thing you know they'll be putting fake cars and people on the street....

i thought that's why they hired cops with their trigger happy speed guns....

ceez

uhhhhh..... on my motorcycle- I'd swerve to miss something like that at high speeds, and probably get myself killed. Oh, well- I never wanted to go to philly anyways!

MasterYong

The person who came up with this ridiculous idea probably DOESN'T live in Philly, or decided to dream of another city where they actually actually stop when they come to a stop light. Living here for close to 30 years I can tell you this only works on paper, with cartoon like stick figures riding up and down them. Cause if the speed limits, cameras, police, intersection changes, and the addition of more stop lights aren't gonna stop these people, there isn't anyway these child like chalk drawings are gonna work.

BookbagNinja

that could make for some really trippy space cruisin'..

VENAT0R

This is the dumbest idea ever. Yeah it will work for the first time or 2 but then people are going to become desensitized to crap in the road because they are going to think everything at intersections in the road is just one of these stupid a$$ drawings. Next thing you know there actually is something in the road and people will not react to it.

Needless to say once again, how our countries common sense is not present in goverment officials.

How about doing something beneficial and take away stupid people's licenses? Or better yet how about getting rid of the stupid goverment officials that think up this crap.

Whoever thought of this idea should be fired.

Are all drawings going to be like the one above? Seriously if I saw something like this in the road, I wouldn't be slowing down to drive over it. I would swerve to prevent from hitting it. Unless I'm driving around a tank or Jeep no vehicle would be able to take something like this on without serious damage.

I can tell you right now that some pranksters will evetually create some concrete replicas of these 3D drawings and then put them in the intersection at night to really screw those people who got accustom to the fake 3D drawings. Then we'll really see what type of damage something like this is going to do to your vehicle.

This idea gets the 5 star idiot rating.

ChemEng